


Take Me Home

by masc_malfunction



Series: Home [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: BAMF Umino Iruka, Biker AU, Biker Kakashi, College Student Iruka, Fluff, Iruka takes no shit, Kakashi's super into it, M/M, Mentions of past abuse, Mild Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mizuki is only mentioned, POV switch, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-07
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-03-28 08:42:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 44,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13900410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/masc_malfunction/pseuds/masc_malfunction
Summary: Ask around, and anyone would tell you the same: Kakashi Hatake is bad news. He's cocky, he's brazen, and his gang is infamous for being impossible to take down. Rumors are always flying around town, about his age, his looks, his more unsavory behaviors...frequently, about if there was anyone who could be a match for him.Nobody would have guessed his match would be an unassuming, loveable education student from the local community college.





	1. Chapter 1

Kakashi Hatake was not, by anyone standards, a ‘clean-cut’ man. He knew it, everyone knew it, people had given up on him changing. At age 24 he was an orphan, a high school dropout, leader of a biker gang, and all-around misfit. He and his crowd tore around on their bikes at all hours of the night; drinking, fighting, flirting, basically doing whatever they pleased. The scars that littered his weathered leather jacket rivaled the scar that bisected his left eye, only visible when he pushed his unruly shock of silver hair away from his forehead. His missing left eye was notoriously depicted by the stylized red eye that was painted across his blind spot on his helmet visor. He kept the rest of his face covered by a black bandana, worn mostly for comfort under his helmet, but left on more often than not out of laziness. He could be identified from a mile away, and this frequently lead to Kakashi’s advantage. On the rare instance it didn’t lead to people giving him a wide breadth, it lead to altercations that Kakashi and his group could almost always handle.

Tonight seemed to be the former of the two options, much to Kakashi’s silent relief. His gang, particularly Gai, had been antsy for trouble for the past few days, but Kakashi himself had been feeling sluggish. He wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but the usual antics had been boring him as of late. His bike was parked in an alley, Kakashi himself leaned up against the brick wall of the local dive bar that ran the ‘bad part’ of town. He’d bummed a cigarette from that one regular with the beard, and he watched the smoke curl up into the night air as he tuned out the light bickering between his groupmates.

Kakashi sighed out a cloud of smoke, groaning softly and letting his head rest against the bricks. He ran with his best fucking friends, but he was sick of listening to Gai whine about being bored. He was certain Tenzo was too, but that man had seemingly endless patience and would never just tell Bowl Cut to shut his damn mouth. He was almost tempted to cut out early, just go home for the night and crash, when a sudden flurry of sound and motion caught his eye.

He heard the approach before he saw it. A shockingly loud voice rang out through the empty streets, growing closer by the second.

 _“Anko, I’ve told you already, I don’t want to be here! I’m not going in_ there _with you—stop!”_

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, his interest piqued before the two bodies even rounded the corner. Once they did, his eyebrow rose appraisingly. Maybe tonight didn’t have to be a waste.

The woman was familiar, he could only assume her name was Anko. She didn’t really interest Kakashi. However, the victim she was dragging down the street definitely did. Tall, tan skin, dark hair held up in a ponytail, thick scar bisecting his nose. Kakashi had never seen him before. He was absolutely certain he’d remember if he had. He wasn’t drop-dead gorgeous by most people’s standards, but from what Kakashi had seen he had a fiery temper and a voice Kakashi definitely wouldn’t mind making scream a little more.

“Irukaaaa,” Anko whined, tugging a little harder on her friend’s hand. “Please, you don’t have to drink or dance or anything! Just come inside with me,” she begged.

The man (Iruka, Kakashi guessed) rolled his eyes, managing to tug his hand out of Anko’s grip. “No drinking, no dancing, no going in. I. Don’t. Want. To. Be. Here.” He growled, huffing out a short breath. “I’ll…wait for you out here. Go.”

Anko groaned loudly, before realizing that’d probably be the best she was going to get that night. She gave Iruka a quick, tight hug, before disappearing into the bar. Iruka sighed heavily, leaning up against the wall by the entrance.

Kakashi smirked to himself, making a show out of slowly arching his back off the wall and standing. He dropped his cigarette, stomping it out loudly before taking a step closer to the wall where Iruka stood. Tenzo picked up on his movement and frowned, cutting Gai off mid-complaint.

“Yo, Kakashi, what’s up?”

Kakashi waved him off nonchalantly, slipping his hands into his pockets and taking a few more steps towards Iruka.

“So, I get that she wasn’t your type, but could I convince you to have a little fun with me?” Kakashi called, licking his lips under his bandana.

Iruka looked up with a start, making eye contact with Kakashi before his shoulders visibly tensed. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me,” Kakashi answered, close enough now to lean his forearm up against the wall, leaning into Iruka’s personal space and tugging his bandana down slightly. “Hate to see a pretty thing like you waiting out here by yourself. I could keep you company,”

Iruka scowled, his eyebrows knitting together as he looked defiantly into Kakashi’s eye.

“Get the fuck away from me,” he spat.

Kakashi’s eye widened, but he didn’t make any moves. “Hey now—”

“Get the fuck _away_ from me!” Iruka yelled then, pushing Kakashi’s shoulders with both hands, hard. Kakashi stumbled slightly, mostly from shock, and he held both hands up in a gesture of surrender.

Tenzo and Gai moved to his back within the second.

“Hey, hey, relax,” Kakashi's words were calm and placating, but the edge in his voice was noticeable. “I just wanted to show you a good time, damn. Point fucking taken,”

This wasn’t the first time Kakashi had been rejected. But damn if it didn’t sting every time. No, correction, this time didn’t sting. But it might end up bruising. This kid didn’t fuck around with the shoving.

“Hit me up if you change your mind, Princess. Offer stands,” he smirked, shoving his hands back into his pockets after pulling his bandana back on. “Let’s go, boys.”

Kakashi turned then, Tenzo and Gai at his back, to head into the bar to lick his wounds. It had been a while since he’d been so thoroughly shut down, he didn’t think he’d forget that anytime soon. And even if he did, Tenzo definitely wouldn’t. The bastard loved to rub his failures in his face.

He sunk into a barstool and ordered himself a round, ready to settle in for a long night. Maybe if he drank enough, he could at least forget until morning.

He never got the chance, though.

___

Iruka was absolutely furious. Not angry, he’d been angry before. No, this was different. This was clenched fists, flushed cheeks, burning, fuming, _rage_. At Anko, for ignoring all his protests and dragging him out to some seedy bar. At Kakashi _fucking_ Hatake, for trying to pick him up like he was turning tricks on the corner. And a little at himself, really, for letting both of those situations lead to this.

Iruka recognized Kakashi as soon as he stomped out his cigarette. Everybody would have, you couldn’t spit in this damn town without hitting someone who was eager to talk about Kakashi Hatake in hushed, secretive tones. About how “ _Kakashi is dangerous”_ or “ _Kakashi's no good,”_ or _“Kakashi takes whatever he wants from whoever he wants, if you know what’s good for you you’ll stay away”_. Iruka, frankly, was sick of hearing about it. He didn’t understand how one man so effectively brought a town to its knees. The rumors, honestly, did the man too many favors. Sure, he was tall, but he was built like a twig. And his fearsome “gang” was two of the most unintimidating, goofy looking men Iruka had ever laid eyes on.  

 _“And he had the_ nerve _to talk to me like that! Just strut his ass over here and get all in my personal fucking space, make his voice all low—”_ Iruka groaned to himself, dragging his hands down his face hard. He’d _never_ admit it aloud, but he had been curious. For months, all he’d done was hear about Kakashi, but he’d never seen the man for himself. He’d be lying if he said he _hadn’t_ let his mind wander into more…interesting imaginings about the feel of silver hair or worn leather. But only once, and he’d never thought he’d go through with it.

Until today. When he strut his _perfect_ ass over to him, and leaned his fucking _gorgeous_ face down and practically _purred_ —

And Iruka had told him no. Violently. With shoving.

Iruka bristled a little at the memory. He didn’t think he could be blamed for his reaction. His pride was at stake here, he wasn’t about to be caught dead _swooning_ into the arms of Kakashi Hatake. No, the bastard wasn’t gonna find an easy thrill from Iruka. _“Princess”_ , he called him. The nickname made Iruka’s blood boil.

Before Iruka could truly come to his senses, he pushed himself off the wall. Adrenaline was coursing through him, and it made him bold, despite the slight tremor in his hands. He pushed the bar door open hard, shouldering past who he assumed was a bouncer as he scanned the room for silver.

He found his target with his back to him, at a corner barstool with his two stupid friends. A sitting duck.

He stormed through the crowded bar like a tornado, stopping directly behind the three men, arms folded across his chest.

“Hey!”

Kakashi turned slowly, and when a single grey gaze met burning dark brown, he visibly stiffened. He opened his mouth to speak, but Iruka didn’t give him the chance.

“Well? Are you gonna fucking take me home, or what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys...I'm so excited to write this story. I have at least three chapters written so far, and so far it's just pouring out of my brain I can barely write fast enough (knock on wood). Let me know if you're enjoying it!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm so glad people are liking this. I've been planning the rest of this story out, trying to get a read on how many chapters it'll end up being. But for now, I'll probably just keep posting as chapters are ready.

Kakashi thought he knew what to expect when people shouted at him at bars. So when it happened tonight, he reacted accordingly. He sighed, downed the last of his drink, and turned around slowly. He really hoped that it wouldn’t take long. Gai might have been itching for trouble, but Kakashi just wanted a goddamn break.

He really, truly, wasn’t expecting to lock gazes with the same deep, fiery brown eyes he’d met outside the bar. He froze, his eye widening and his jaw going slack. Was he offended? Kakashi really didn’t peg him for a straight guy who’d try to come kick his ass after getting hit on. But he’d been wrong before.

And then he stood there, arms folded against his chest and hip jutted out defiantly, and demanded Kakashi take him home.

Kakashi was starting to believe he’d gotten knocked silly. This had to be a fever dream.

Kakashi must have stayed in stunned silence for too long for Iruka’s taste, because his eyebrows knit closer together and he huffed out an impatient breath.

Kakashi let out a startled noise that, to his ears, sounded a lot like _“Bwuh?”_ He was still frozen on the barstool, his uncovered mouth gaping in a way that surely was ruining his carefully crafted cool-and-unflappable façade.

His mind was working overtime. The man he just (unsuccessfully) tried to pick up, who had previously been refusing to set foot into the bar, had followed him inside the very same bar to ask him for a ride home.

What, exactly, was he waiting for?

“Well, are you?” Iruka asked again. Kakashi was either dreaming, or his cheeks flushed pink.

Kakashi shook his head quickly, trying desperately to ignore the fact that his cheeks and ears were burning, and that both Gai and Tenzo were watching the exchange unblinkingly.

“Uh, yeah. _Fuck_ yeah, I am.” Kakashi finally managed to get out, his mouth feeling inexplicably dry despite just having downed a drink. He pushed himself off the barstool with considerably less grace than usual, holding out an arm to keep Gai on his stool. This, he was handling alone.

Kakashi paused, standing face-to-face with Iruka in silence for a few seconds. Kakashi beat him in height by a good couple of inches, but it clearly did him no favors in whatever power struggle they seemed to be having. He was still being stared down fearlessly, and it kind of made him want to shrink. He squared his shoulders as confidently as he could, raising an eyebrow.

“Good,” The shorter man huffed out a sigh. Was Kakashi imagining it, or did he seem surprised? “Let’s go,”

“After you,” Kakashi murmured, starting to regain some of his composure. He gestured toward the door, sparing a glance back at a befuddled Tenzo and Gai before turning and following the sight of a bobbing brown ponytail out the door.

___

Silence really wasn’t the response Iruka was expecting when he confronted Kakashi at the bar. Based on his behavior outside, (not to mention in all the fucking rumors about him, to boot), he expected a smooth reply, or maybe a biting retort. Horrified, shocked silence was the last thing Iruka thought to get in return.

Shit. Maybe he really fucked this up.

He told him the offer stood if he changed his mind. Maybe he didn’t mean it. Maybe he was trying to save face in front of his friends. Maybe he wasn’t even gay, he was just trying to make Iruka uncomfortable. It wouldn’t be the first time that happened to him. Shit, did he just call Kakashi Hatake on a bluff? Loudly, in front of a bar full of patrons? Well, there was no fucking backing out of this one.

“Well, are you?” He repeated, hoping his voice came out just as strong. Shit. He was definitely blushing now, he could feel it. He hoped he could pass it off as anger, not as the awkward embarrassment he was truly feeling. So far, the only response he’d gotten out of Kakashi was a strangled sounding _“Bwuh?”_ and a lot of surprised staring. Not exactly the desired response when propositioning someone.

But then, Kakashi seemed to shake himself out of it. He stood, still looking rather like a deer in headlights, and answered.

“Uh, yeah. _Fuck_ yeah, I am.”

Iruka felt relief flood his system, but he didn’t let it show in his body. He stared defiantly up at Kakashi as they stood facing one another, not missing the subtle slump of the taller man’s shoulders, or the red dusting Kakashi’s ears and cheeks. He felt a smirk tugging at his lips. One point for Iruka.

“Good,” He said curtly, silently thinking his lucky stars that he wasn’t rejected in a similar manner. “Let’s go.”

He heard Kakashi murmur “After you,”, hints of his earlier suave façade threatening to return. Oh, hell no. If Kakashi thought this was going to be smooth sailing from this point forward, he was about to have another think coming.

He lead the pair of them outside, stopping just outside the bar to turn his gaze back on Kakashi again.

“For the record, my name’s Iruka. Not _Princess_ ,” he sneered, almost daring Kakashi to use the nickname again. “I live in the shitty apartment block on 7th. You’re not guaranteed an invite in.”

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, holding Iruka’s gaze as he walked over to his bike in the alley. “Fair enough,” he shrugged, grabbing his helmet and throwing it to Iruka.

Iruka caught the helmet on reflex, looking at it quizzically. “What’s this for?”

Kakashi smirked, before pulling his bandana back up over his nose. “I only got the one. Put it on. You’re the precious cargo here, Princess,”

Iruka bristled at the nickname yet again, but shoved the helmet over his head. If nothing else, it concealed the hot blush that creeped over his face. He approached Kakashi’s bike with some trepidation, biting his lip and slinging his leg up to straddle Kakashi’s back. After a second’s hesitation, he wrapped his arms around Kakashi’s midsection.

The position meant he felt Kakashi’s low chuckle more than heard it. But then the engine kicked on, and his arms tightened around Kakashi instinctually. He was glad they did, too, because that was his only warning before Kakashi closed the kickstand and peeled out of the alleyway with a roar of the engine.


	3. Chapter 3

It wasn’t often that Kakashi rode without his helmet. Rarer still was riding in the city without his helmet. When he took people home on his bike, they either provided their own helmet or they sucked it up. But something about Iruka…something about him turned Kakashi’s entire world upside down. He was aggressive, and demanding, and yet holding so tightly around Kakashi’s chest that he clearly had never done anything like this before. The thought made Kakashi’s head spin in a funny way, so he tried not to think about it too hard. Instead, he focused on the wind in his hair and the warmth pressed against his back.

He took the back roads and shortcuts he knew, and they arrived at 7th pretty quickly. Kakashi, not being used to doing things entirely on the up-and-up, stopped his bike in a dim alleyway a few buildings down from Iruka’s so-called shitty apartment block.

Iruka’s arms didn’t loosen until the hum of the engine cut out entirely and Kakashi knocked the kickstand down, and he sat up as he relaxed.

“First bike ride?” Kakashi murmured, smirking even as he mourned the loss of the contact.

“So what if it was?”

The retort was muffled by Kakashi’s helmet, which Kakashi twisted around in time to watch Iruka pull off. His ponytail looked a little worse for wear, several strands of hair having fallen out to frame Iruka’s face messily.

Kakashi shrugged, turning himself around so he sat with his back to the handlebars, facing Iruka. He wasn’t sure if it was intentional or not, but Iruka had placed Kakashi’s helmet between his legs, effectively keeping them separate.

“I was just curious. You gonna bite my head off for everything, Princess?”

Iruka growled softly, glaring at Kakashi. “My name is _Iruka_ ,” he insisted.

Kakashi laughed softly, tugging his bandana down and shaking his head gently. “Proving my point though, right?” he teased. “Fine, _Iruka_ , I was just curious. You make a habit of beating a guy then demanding rides home?”

Kakashi grinned as Iruka’s cheeks flushed and he finally dropped his gaze.

“No,” he muttered. “You made me angry.”

Kakashi laughed aloud at that, leaning closer to rest his elbows on the helmet between them. “So angry, you wanted to take me home? Hell, whatever works,”

Iruka groaned in frustration, knocking Kakashi’s helmet out from underneath his arms, causing him to curse as he fell forward suddenly.

“God, do you ever stop talking out of your ass?”

Kakashi’s eyes widened as Iruka’s hands fisted in the lapels of his worn leather jacket, roughly pulling him close and crashing their lips together. It was hard, and aggressive, and Kakashi definitely tasted blood. He let out a muffled noise in surprise, but pressed closer all the same. He brought his hands up to frame Iruka’s face, tangling his fingers in the fallen pieces of Iruka’s hair, trying to gain back some control of the kiss.

After the initial frantic clash of mouths, Iruka’s kisses were needy, hungry, bordering on desperate. But damn, if he didn’t know how to fucking kiss. The kiss pulled a low moan from Kakashi’s throat, and he parted his lips eagerly to slide his tongue against Iruka’s. It had been a while since he had to fight for control, and the challenge of it sent a thrill through his gut.

Kakashi heard Iruka whimper gently against his lips, feeling him tug insistently at his jacket, trying to get closer, prevented from doing so by the position of their knees against each other. Kakashi stilled, pulling back slowly, shivering at the frustrated whine that pulled from Iruka.

“Wait,” Kakashi murmured, willing his breath to even out. He should not be so affected by this so fast. He slid his hands down Iruka’s shoulders, smoothing over his sides before resting on Iruka’s hips. “Lift up,”

Iruka’s eyes widened a little, but he allowed Kakashi to guide his hips up over his legs so he was straddling Kakashi on the bike. Kakashi smirked, smoothing his hands around to grip Iruka’s ass and give a teasing squeeze.

“That better, Princess?” 

Iruka snorted, wrapping his arms around Kakashi’s neck and leaning close to bite at his lower lip. That earned a low growl from Kakashi, which turned into a moan as Iruka slowly tugged off his lip, never breaking eye contact.

“Where did a pretty thing like you learn to kiss like that?” Kakashi breathed, his fingers running over Iruka’s hips teasingly.

That earned him a devious smirk from Iruka, who leaned in to nibble at Kakashi’s earlobe and whisper.

“You haven’t even scratched the surface of what I know how to do,”

Kakashi could have sworn he felt his brain short-circuit as he felt Iruka’s breath ghost across the shell of his ear. He shivered, nuzzling his nose into the crook of Iruka’s neck and smirking.

“I can’t fucking wait to find out.”

___

If you had told Iruka mere hours ago that he would end the night in a dirty alley, his hair down, straddling and sucking face with Kakashi Hatake on the back of his motorbike, he would have laughed in your face. Laughed, and possibly hit you for even suggesting it.

Yet here he was, Kakashi’s fingers tangled in his loose hair, hickies and bite marks littering his neck and collarbones, Kakashi’s other hand down his back jeans pocket, rutting lazily against Kakashi’s hip as they kissed deep and slow.

Their initial meeting was frantic and desperate, but once they started touching they slid easily into an unhurried rhythm. Iruka completely lost track of how long they had been there, kissing and touching and teasing and grinding together.

Iruka was surprised at how responsive Kakashi truly was. He had always been told, himself, that he was loud in bed. Too loud, sometimes, by the men he slept with in the past. Kakashi matched him in volume easily, and it was an unexpected but completely welcome turn on.

Iruka pulled back slightly, his breathing heavy as his eyes raked over Kakashi hungrily. His leather jacket was hanging off one shoulder, and his bandana was untied and hanging loose to expose his neck, which Iruka had marked as good as he’d gotten himself. His cheeks were flushed, his shirt was rucked up, and the button of his jeans was undone (When did that happen? Iruka couldn’t remember). He looked completely strung-out and utterly _filthy_ , and Iruka couldn’t fucking get enough.

Iruka rolled his hips, slow and purposeful, watching intently as Kakashi’s eye fluttered shut and he let out a long groan. He slid his hands up Iruka’s inner thighs, stopping teasingly close, drawing a frustrated noise from Iruka.

“God you’re a tease, Hatake,” Iruka groaned, threading his fingers through Kakashi’s hair and tugging sharply to look him in the eye.

Kakashi grunted softly, smirking up at him.

“I like to give as good as I get,”

Iruka raised an eyebrow, leaning closer to brush his lips across Kakashi’s. The contact was brief and feather-light, and Iruka smirked when Kakashi tried to follow the contact, held back by Iruka’s hands in his hair.

“Is that a promise?” Iruka whispered, tugging Kakashi’s head to the side to suck a mark below his ear.

Kakashi shivered, squeezing Iruka’s thighs and squirming underneath him.

“Fuck, Princess…it’s whatever you want,”

Iruka growled, biting down on Kakashi’s neck and relishing in the soft moan it earned him. He dragged a hand down Kakashi’s chest and stomach, pausing just above the waistband of his jeans. Kakashi full-out whined at that, long and loud, squirming his hips under Iruka’s weight to no avail.

“God, Iruka, _please_ ,”

Iruka moaned, pressing his palm against the obvious bulge in Kakashi’s jeans and squeezing gently.

“I knew I could get you to use my name,” he breathed, meeting Kakashi’s gaze with a wicked smile. Kakashi’s visible eye darkened and he licked his lips, letting Iruka pull him close by the hair and connect their lips in a searing kiss.

There was a renewed fire to their kissing now, hands wandering and groping with purpose. Iruka pulled back, locking eyes with Kakashi as he slowly dragged down the zipper of his jeans. Kakashi’s eyes flickered from Iruka’s face to his hands, watching as tanned fingers worked their way inside tight jeans with a soft groan.

Iruka’s triumphant smirk wavered when he felt hands on his own waistband, tugging his jeans open roughly. Kakashi wasted no time sliding his hand past the waist of Iruka’s boxers, stroking Iruka’s length and drawing out a strangled whine.

“Fuck,” Iruka panted, his hips pushing up against Kakashi’s hand. After how long they had spent teasing and working each other up, he was going to be embarrassingly quick. He leaned down to catch Kakashi’s lips in his own again, when both men froze.

A shrill, electronic ringtone rang out, much too loud in the tiny space the shared, causing Iruka to squeak from the accompanying vibration in his front pocket. Who the fuck would be calling him _now?_ He took his hand off Kakashi, despite the small noise of protest, and fished his phone out of his pocket. He had every intention of cancelling the call, turning off his phone, and getting right back to business. The name on the screen stopped him.

“Shit,” he whispered, running a hand through his hair distractedly. “Fuck!”

“What? Who is it?” Kakashi murmured, his eyebrows knitting together.

“Anko,” Iruka muttered, shaking his head. “I went out tonight with her, I told her I’d wait and then I just…ran off with you, she must think…”

He didn’t wanna know what she might think. Probably not that he was in an alley beside his apartment, with Kakashi Hatake’s hand on his dick.

“Can’t you ignore her?” The plea in Kakashi’s question didn’t go unnoticed.

Iruka laughed weakly, looking down at Kakashi regretfully.

“You don’t know Anko. If I don’t answer her now, she’ll just keep calling. Or worse, she’ll come looking for me.” He sighed, slowly moving off Kakashi to stand.

Kakashi frowned, moving like he was going to try and keep Iruka there. He seemed to think better of it.

Iruka sighed again, shooting Kakashi a small smile.

“I’m sorry. I really...really am. But maybe it’s for the best, anyway, she might need someone to come get her and I have class in the morning tomorrow, and--” he zipped his pants back up quickly, hesitating a moment. His phone hadn’t stopped ringing, but that wasn’t what cut him off.

Kakashi stood, moving so they were standing face-to-face like they had at the bar.

“Iruka,” Kakashi began, his hand reaching out to Iruka’s elbow. Iruka’s hairtie was around his wrist. “I wanna see you again.”

Iruka paused, looking up into Kakashi’s visible eye. If he said he hadn’t been thinking the same, he’d be lying. But what could Kakashi really want from him? Was this just because they were interrupted? Once they actually had sex, would they see each other ever again?

Iruka supposed there was only one way to find out.

He licked his lips quickly, shoving a hand into his pocket and pulling out a pen. He shoved Kakashi’s jacket sleeve up his arm, scribbling his phone number across the inside of a pale forearm before shooting Kakashi a grin. He hesitated a moment, before reaching up and swiping Kakashi’s bandana off his shoulder, shoving it into his back pocket.

“There. Now we both have a souvenir,” he teased, stepping backwards toward his apartment. “Call me,”

He turned and practically skipped out of the alley, finally unlocking his phone to answer Anko’s call. They had a lot to talk about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a super fun chapter to write, I'm so happy people are liking this story! Leave a comment if you are so inclined, I love reading them!


	4. Chapter 4

Kakashi watched Iruka retreat in a daze, the image of his bandana hanging out of Iruka’s back pocket as he walked away burning itself into his memory. Nobody Kakashi had ever been with before—scratch that, nobody Kakashi had ever _met_ before would ever have thought about doing anything like that. Even fewer people still would actually have gone through with it.

He stood frozen in that alleyway until Iruka disappeared from view, his jaw slightly slack and his clothing disheveled. He looked down at the ink hastily scribbled on his arm, just below the hairtie on his wrist, blinking rapidly in an attempt to clear his head. He’d been given numbers before, of course. Both before and after hooking up with people. He’d never used them before, never even thought about it.

He pulled his phone out of his back pocket, snapping a photo of the number on his arm.

Kakashi ran a hand through his hair distractedly, slowly starting to pull his clothes back on to some semblance of decency. Iruka…what the hell did he see in Iruka? The kid punched him in the shoulders and then shouted at him in the middle of the bar until he got a ride home.

And blushed when Kakashi teased him. And felt so warm on his back of Kakashi’s bike. And kissed so dirty Kakashi’s knees were threatening to go weak at the memory alone.

Goddammit if he wasn’t very, _very_ into Iruka.

It had been a very long time, since he met Tenzo, really, that someone had been able to match him blow-by-blow so easily. And even then, it wasn’t nearly as disarming. People tended to look at Kakashi now with a strange mix of fear, awe, and either lust or hatred. There really hadn’t been a lot of in-between in recent memory. Iruka’s eyes didn’t really have any of that. Well, there was lust. But not at first. Most importantly, he was never afraid, and he never put Kakashi on a stupid pedestal. He wasn’t just here to try and bed the infamous Hatake, or whatever it was people did. At least…he didn’t seem like he was. Kakashi hoped that he wasn’t.

There was something captivating about the man in the ponytail who stole Kakashi’s bandana and then left him in the cold because he had class in the morning. And Kakashi found him irresistible.

Tenzo really wasn’t ever gonna let him hear the end of this.

___

Iruka answered the phone call from Anko as he slipped into the lobby of his building. Well, technically, this was the second phone call, the first had gone to voicemail while he was still talking to Kakashi.

“Hi, Anko,” he answered, bracing himself for the storm. He was the one that ditched, he kind of deserved this.

 _“Iruka! Where the hell are you? Are you dead? Did you ditch me?”_ Anko’s voice rang out loudly through the phone, causing Iruka to wince slightly and move the phone a few inches away from his ear.

“I’m sorry, Anko,” Iruka sighed. “I kind of…left in a hurry. Do you need me to come back for you?”

_“…Oh, Iruka….in a hurry?”_

Iruka groaned, immediately recognizing the smirk in her voice. Her go-to was lewd, and this time she was actually right. She wasn’t going to believe him.

_“Who did you go home with in a ‘hurry’, huh? Was he cute enough to ditch me for?”_

“Clearly, he was,” Iruka muttered, unlocking his front door, knowing he was blushing. At least Anko couldn’t see. “And you wouldn’t believe me even if I told you.”

_“I’m gonna be there in ten minutes. There better be wine. You’re telling me everything.”_

“Anko, I have class tomorrow,” he whined, knowing it wouldn’t make any difference. Anko was stubborn, and already tipsy. There was no stopping her.

_“If you were planning on fucking on a school night, you can plan on gossiping on a school night!”_

“Oh, my god,” Iruka laughed, shaking his head. “Fine, you win. I’m hanging up now.”

Iruka threw his phone onto his couch, running his fingers through his hair absentmindedly. It was then that he remembered that his hair was down. His hair was down, and Kakashi had stolen his hairtie. He dug around in his bedside drawers while he waited for Anko, managing to find another hairtie and throw his hair up in a messy bun. He didn’t have much time after that before he heard a loud knock at his door, rolling his eyes as Anko began to yell for him.

“Anko, Jesus Christ, it’s after midnight. I have neighbors,” Iruka chided her as she brushed past him, flopping down on his couch and putting her feet on his coffee table.

“All your neighbors are students, they’re awake,” she rolled her eyes, patting the spot on the couch next to her. “Spill. Who’d you leave with? Did you get any? Is he still here?” She looked around at that, as if she expected to find him hiding behind the furniture.

“No, no one’s here,” Iruka felt the blush creeping up his face again. “What makes you so sure I even left with anyone?”

Anko fixed him with a hard stare.

“Iruka, honey, I’m not stupid. You’re the most reliable man in this whole town. If you said you were gonna wait for me, it’d take hell or high water for you to ditch,” she smirked. “Or someone _really_ hot. Tell me everything, spare no detail, I’m so proud of you for finally getting laid!”

“Anko,” Iruka protested as she flung herself on him in a hug, squirming to try and get out of her grip. “I didn’t even get laid, _Someone’s_ insistent phone calls made sure of that,”

Anko did, at least, have the decency to look sheepish.

“I’m only a little mad at you, it was really fucking hot,” Iruka teased, grinning. It was pretty rare for Anko to look guilty, and he was planning on milking it for all its worth.

“I’m sorry ‘Ruka,” Anko whined, pouting at him. “Forgive me,”

Iruka laughed, shaking his head a little. “I’m not really mad. But shit, Anko…it really was hot,” he admitted, hoping she wouldn’t notice him blush. Or at least, not call him out on it.

Anko full on leered, leaning in close. “Okay, so spill, ‘Ruka,” she purred. “I need it all. What’s his name? How tall was he? What did he look like? How big was his—”

“Oh my god, Anko!” Iruka groaned, burying his face in his hands. “I mean…god, he was really hot,” he murmured, muffled against his hands. He peeked through his fingers, catching Anko’s eyes.

“Anko…I hooked up with Kakashi Hatake,”

Anko’s eyes widened as she took in what Iruka said. Her entire face lit up slowly, and she practically screamed.

“Iruka! Holy shit, you’re fucking shitting me!” she cried, bouncing in her seat. “You goddamn liar, no fucking _way_ ,”

“I told you you wouldn’t believe me,” Iruka rolled his eyes. “I’m not lying. I…stole his bandana when I left,” he admitted, pulling it out of his pocket and offering it to Anko.

If his neighbors didn’t know he had a guest over, they definitely did now. Anko shrieked wordlessly, grabbing the bandana out of Iruka’s hands.

“Holy _shit_ Iruka! I need details. I need _so_ many details, we’re gonna be here all damn night,”

Iruka groaned, hiding his face again. He knew it was pointless to try and resist, though. He told her about Kakashi hitting on him outside the bar, and how he’d snapped and pushed him away. He told her about how angry he was afterwards, and how he’d stormed inside and demanded that Kakashi take him home (he’d needed to take a break then, to give Anko enough time to finish absolutely howling with mirth). He told her about _“Princess”_ , about the bike helmet, and about how hard he’d clung to Kakashi on the ride here.  It was only when he got to Kakashi parking in the alleyway that he paused. He paused just long enough to catch the knowing gleam in Anko’s eyes before he pulled his knees to his chest and hid his face in them.

“ _So_ ,” Anko purred, scooting closer. “Kakashi Hatake himself has give you a ride home, let you _wear_ _his helmet_ , and you parked with him in an alley? My my, ‘Ruka, I didn’t know you had such a dirty side,”

“Shut up,” Iruka groaned, refusing to look her in the eye.

“And? Go on, I know damn well that isn’t the end of the story,”

“You’re right, it isn’t,” Iruka squeaked, his arms tightening around his knees. There was no way he could look Anko in the eyes while talking about this. He was certain his face was bright red.

Anko laughed gleefully, poking Iruka in his sides until he squeaked, finally coming out of hiding to try and bat her hands away.

“Tell me! Did you invite him in? Did you suck his dick? Tell meeee,”

“I didn’t suck his dick,” Iruka huffed, averting his eyes but giving up on hiding his crimson face. “And I didn’t invite him in. I…we… _Istraddledhimandwemadeoutonhisbike_ ,”

Anko shrieked yet again, throwing a pillow at Iruka which he promptly buried his face in. Maybe if he just suffocated himself right now, he’d never have to face Anko again.

“Oh my _God,_ ‘Ruka!” Anko exclaimed. “You didn’t tell me I interrupted you in the middle of the reenactment of a fucking _wet dream_ , holy fuck!”

“Don’t remind me,” Iruka lamented, looking up at her again. Embarrassment be damned. “Anko…when you called, he literally had a hand on my dick.”

“Shut the _fuck_ up, Iruka!” Anko’s jaw went slack, and she stared at him for a solid thirty seconds in horrified silence. “Honey, I’m so sorry. I owe you an immeasurable debt,”

“It’s okay,” Iruka muttered, shaking his head slowly.

“No, it’s not! I blew it for you, and you’ve had a crush on Hatake for months,”

Iruka blanched, hitting Anko with his pillow gently. “I did not have a _crush_ on Kakashi,” he objected. “I…had a _fantasy_ about the idea of him. I didn’t know anything about him for real,”

“Don’t quibble semantics with me,” Anko huffed. “The point is, I ruined your chance to…to…”

Iruka raised an eyebrow. “To come in my pants in front of Kakashi Hatake? I think I’ll live,” He paused, looking down at his hands. “He also said he wanted to see me again, so,”

“What!” Anko exclaimed. “You didn’t mention that part! Holy shit, Iruka, you vixen,” she teased, grinning. “You gonna see him again?”

Iruka shrugged, smiling a little in spite of himself. “I dunno…I gave him my number. And stole his bandana, so…if he wants it back…”

Anko cackled, shoving Iruka playfully. “Look at you, all blushy and smiley,” she shook her head slowly. “You _so_ have a crush.”

“I do not,” Iruka muttered, rolling his eyes. “But…I wouldn’t _not_ wanna see him again…if he asked.”

“Suuure,” Anko snorted, reaching over and ruffling Iruka’s hair as much as she could before he smacked her hands away.  “Good luck with your hot new biker boyfriend. Hook me up with someone in his gang,”

Iruka laughed, wrinkling his nose. “God, Anko, the guys in his gang aren’t your type,” he snorted. “Now get outta here, I told you everything. I have class tomorrow,”

“Yeah, yeah,” Anko huffed, standing up from the couch. She paused at Iruka’s door, turning back to grin at him “You better keep me updated. I want my vicarious smooches!”

She slammed the door behind her just as Iruka threw his pillow.

___

For lack of anything better to do, Kakashi made his way back to the bar. It wasn’t too late yet, and honestly, Kakashi still wanted a drink or two to clear his head. He wasn’t used to having so many…thoughts surrounding a hookup. To be fair, he’d never had a hookup like Iruka. He’d never felt the urge to see any of them ever again. Actively avoided it, sometimes. But something about Iruka drew him in in a way he couldn’t describe, and he knew it was going to drive him nuts unless he figured out why.

As it turned out, Tenzo and Gai were still at the bar when Kakashi returned. He had a brief moment where he considered turning right back around and leaving, but Tenzo caught his eye before he could. Damn it.

He made his way over to the bar, ordering a new drink before settling down beside his friends. All three of them were silent for several long minutes, before Tenzo finally broke.

“Well? A successful night after all, Kakashi?” he asked, staring pointedly at his marked-up neck. “What’d you do, leave your bandana off for bragging rights?”

He definitely wouldn’t miss the way Kakashi’s cheeks and ears flushed at that statement, but Kakashi could dream.

“I, uh. No, that’s not it.” He muttered, downing his drink and flagging the bartender for another.

Tenzo cocked an eyebrow, blinking at Kakashi disbelievingly.

“Okay, Hatake. Your poker face is shit without your stupid mask. Tell me what’s up.”

“It is not!” Kakashi protested, but he wouldn’t meet Tenzo’s eyes. “I…I lost it,” he muttered, chancing a glance at his teammate. One look at Tenzo’s knowing smirk, and he wished he hadn’t looked.

“You lost it,” Tenzo deadpanned, shaking his head. “Kakashi, you’re a shit liar on a good day…”

Kakashi sighed heavily, well aware that both Tenzo and Gai were going to give him their full attention until they got answers.

“He…he took it,” Kakashi muttered, downing drink number two. “When we were…finished. Said we should both get a souvenir,”

Both Tenzo and Gai were struck speechless for a good ten seconds. Kakashi savored it.

“You let him take a _souvenir?_ ” Tenzo shook his head quickly, like he couldn’t believe his ears. “Wait, both of you should have one? What’s yours, a million hickies?”

Kakashi glared, tugging his jacket up higher around his neck. After a moment’s pause, he pulled up his sleeve, showing them both the last few digits of Iruka’s number.

Tenzo let out a low whistle.

“It’s not like you to keep a phone number,”

“Tenzo is right!” Gai finally chipped in, clearly much drunker than Kakashi and Tenzo combined. “Could it be that this mysterious and fiery young man has gotten you to grow soft?”

“Just the opposite, I’d say,” Tenzo teased, grinning at the way Kakashi groaned and fell forward, his head hitting the bar.

“Shut up,” Kakashi begged. He really should have just gone home.

“Fat chance,” Tenzo snorted. “You gonna text him, then? It’s not every day someone picks _you_ up, yeah?”

Kakashi shrugged, his shoulders slumping a little. He’d be lying if he told Tenzo he didn’t want to text Iruka. But honestly…he didn’t know how to. Tenzo wasn’t wrong, it was unlike him to keep a number he’d been given. Even less likely for him to use it. He hadn’t ever really wanted to…flirt? Is that what he wanted to do with Iruka? They hadn’t really spent a lot of time talking tonight. The few times they did, though, they had an enjoyable kind of banter. But what if that didn’t last past the thrill of the hookup? What if it didn’t translate over text? Kakashi’s social skills were rusty at best. What if they couldn’t connect like they did tonight?

More importantly, why was Kakashi so fucking worried about it?

“Yo, earth to Kakashi,” Tenzo’s voice cut through his contemplation. Kakashi scowled.

“We’re going. I gotta take this drunken oaf and his bike home,” Tenzo rolled his eyes, gesturing toward the slumped and rambling figure of Gai that he was supporting on his back. “Ride with me? Take me back to my bike afterwards?”

Eager for the distraction, Kakashi agreed. Iruka’s number would still be there tomorrow for him to contemplate, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being three little sections instead of two, and probably the longest one yet. But it was so much fun to write. Kakashi and Iruka both have great friends who love to embarrass them, because that's what friends are for.


	5. Chapter 5

Iruka had a very difficult time getting dressed the next morning. He hadn’t realized last night, in the heat of the moment, just how badly Kakashi had managed to mark up his neck. Ordinarily, Iruka wouldn’t have cared. He’d gone to college classes with hickies before, and he had no qualms about doing it again. Today, however, he was working in the afternoon as a TA at the local elementary school, and he knew his coworkers there would be considerably more judgmental than his peers at school.

He eventually managed to cover most of the marks with his only turtleneck sweater, thanking whoever above was listening that it was cold enough to justify. It still didn’t cover everything, a few marks behind Iruka’s ears were still visible when he pulled his hair up. Days like these were days Iruka regretted his signature hairdo. Iruka winced slightly at his reflection, unable to really do anything but hope nobody noticed.

He barely managed to walk through the front door of the school building before his hopes were dashed.

He made his first stop of the day in the staff room, dropping off his bag and sighing in relief when he saw the pot of hot coffee. He’d just managed to pour himself a mug when Kotestu, another TA from his year and one of Iruka’s closer friends, sidled up beside him with a smirk.

“Turtleneck, huh? I see someone had fun last night,”

Iruka groaned as Kotetsu waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“Shut up, Kotetsu,” Iruka muttered, taking a long drink from his mug. He was really gonna need it this morning.

Kotetsu laughed, nudging Iruka away from the coffee machine playfully.

“And let Anko have all the fun interrogating you? No way, dude. Tell me,” Kotetsu’s voice lowered conspiratorially. “Was he worth the turtleneck?”

Iruka rolled his eyes, smiling a little despite the situation. “Hell yeah, he was,”

“Oohh,” Kotetsu gasped, grinning. “Iruka Umino, spill! Who is he? Do I know him?”

“No, Kotetsu, you…you haven’t met,” Iruka explained carefully. The subtle difference in Iruka’s answer didn’t go unnoticed by Kotetsu, however.

“Haven’t met, but I know him?” Kotestu asked, raising an eyebrow. “Irukaaaa…what are you hiding from me?”

Iruka groaned, feeling his cheeks heat up. It was no use trying to hide it, Kotetsu knew he only had to ask Anko and he’d get the full report. He might as well hear it from Iruka’s mouth.

“I…may have hooked up with Kakashi Hatake last night?”

Kotetsu’s eyes went wide, and he fell silent for several seconds.

“Holy shit,” Kotetsu muttered, shaking his head a little. “Iruka…holy shit,”

Iruka frowned, folding his arms. He hadn’t expected such a…subdued reaction from Kotetsu. His excitement usually rivaled Anko’s, and while ordinarily he’d be happy his private information wasn’t being broadcast to the entire elementary school, he couldn’t help but wonder what warranted this reaction.

“What?” Iruka asked, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. “I know I haven’t…done anything like this in a while, but I—”

“It’s not that,” Kotetsu cut him off. “I just… _Iruka_ ,”

He let the name out on a heavy sigh, looking up at Iruka with a strange mix of worry and pity in his eyes. Not exactly the reaction Iruka had expected to get out of sharing this story.

“What?” Iruka repeated, confused and a little defensive. “What’s wrong?”

“I just,” Kotetsu paused, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Iruka, I don’t know how to say this nicely,” he screwed his face up, as if he was trying to muster up the courage to speak again. “Iruka, you…You kind of have this type? And I hate to say it, but it seems that your type is grey hair and the likelihood to hurt you,”

Kotetsu’s words hit Iruka like a knife through the chest. He swallowed heavily, slowly setting his mug of coffee down on the countertop. He was dimly aware of the fact that Kotetsu was still talking, but his words sounded fuzzy and far away. He couldn’t think about this now. He had too much to do.

“I have to go set up my class,” Iruka muttered, his coffee forgotten on the counter as he hurried out of the staff room. He leaned against the hallway wall, taking in deep breaths, willing his stomach to un-clench. He really, really did not expect to have to talk about Mizuki this morning. He’d really kind of hoped to never talk about it again, if he was being honest. Just mentioning it, or hearing it mentioned, was enough to send him into a spiral of what he could only describe as extreme anxiety for the rest of the day.

He walked into his (mercifully empty) classroom, sinking into the seat behind the desk and put his head in his hands. He needed to get his breathing back together. He needed to calm down.

He pulled out his phone, hesitating for a few seconds before quickly typing a text to Anko.

**Do you think I’m making a mistake talking to Kakashi?**

He didn’t have to wait long for a reply.

**_A mistake? Nothing’s barely happened yet! Hun, what’s up?_ **

Iruka sighed heavily, trying to get himself calmed down.

**Kotetsu knows. Thinks it’s a mistake. Says my type is ‘grey hair’ and ‘will hurt me’**

**_KOTETSU IS A BITCH._ **

**_Ruka hun I’m so sorry. That was a fucked up thing to say. Are you okay?_ **

**_You have no reason to think that Kakashi is anything like that son of a fuck Mizuki._ **

Iruka winced slightly when he read the name, shutting his eyes and letting out a shaky breath. He wasn’t going to cry. Not at work.

**I had no reason to think he was like that, either.**

Anko didn’t answer for a very long minute.

**_Iruka. I know how scary it is, trying to get back into relationships or anything after what you went through. But you’re stronger now, and smarter, and you know what to look out for. You were so happy and blushy last night thinking about this. Don’t let people like Kotetsu make you too afraid to go after something if you want it, right?_ **

Iruka sniffled softly, burying his face in his hands for a few seconds. She was right, he knew she was. But that doesn’t mean the thought of…anything, really, with Kakashi wasn’t entirely terrifying.

**I know. Thanks, Anko.**

He sent the short answer, shoving his phone back into his pocket and walking in a daze across the hall to the bathroom. He rolled up his sleeves, leaning over the sink to splash some cool water into his face. He had about ten minutes until the teacher showed up, which means about twenty minutes until the students arrived. Plenty of time for him to get himself together. He spared a glance at his phone when it vibrated in his pocket, a small smile tugging at his mouth when he saw that Anko sent him a heart emoji.

He dried his face with the brown paper towels in the bathroom, taking one, final deep breath before walking back into the classroom.

He smiled in greeting when the teacher showed up, slipping comfortably into his daily rhythm. He loved the kids he taught more than almost anything, and they could cheer him up through pretty much any bad mood. By the time he was let off for his lunch break, he had all but forgotten his conversation with Kotetsu.

He slipped out a side door, leaning up against the brick wall of the school and pulling out his brown bag lunch. It was a pretty beautiful day, and he liked sitting outside and spending some time with himself.

He pulled his phone out a few minutes into his lunch, raising an eyebrow when he saw an unsaved number on his screen. He unlocked his phone, his eyes widening a little when he read the text.

**_Is this Iruka?_ **

Iruka smiled to himself, biting down on his lower lip gently.

**Maybe. Is this Kakashi?**

**_Right in one, Princess_ **

**I can and will block your number.**

**_Okay, okay…I’ll stop. Please don’t block me._ **

Iruka laughed to himself softly, rolling his eyes.

**Okay, I won’t for now. But you’re on thin ice, Hatake.**

**_Damn, I’m in the doghouse already? I’m not the one who steals people’s clothes here_ **

Iruka grinned, sliding down against the wall, sitting crossed-legged on the ground holding his phone close.

**Well I suppose you are well within your rights to block me as well.**

**_That’d make it awfully hard to work out how to see you again_ **

Iruka’s eyes widened a little, and he found himself reading the text several times before attempting to type a response.

**You mean you don’t just trust fate to bring us back together?**

**_I’m sure it would. But I’m too impatient for that_ **

Iruka paused, feeling heat creeping up his cheeks again. Goddammit, he was not about to swoon over Kakashi Hatake! Especially not over _texts_.

**Alright then. I’m down to get a rush order on fate. Did you have something in mind?**

**_I’m gonna be honest. I’m not the best at this stuff. But I think at this point it would be okay to ask you to dinner sometime?_ **

Iruka was startled back to reality by the loud, harsh ringing of the school bell. He swore under his breath, shoving his half-eaten lunch back into the paper bag and speed-walking back to his classroom. He paused in the doorway, taking the last few seconds before the kids returned to answer Kakashi.

**I’m in. I gotta get back to work, but I’ll talk to you later.**

He allowed himself one small, giddy smile before his attention turned back to his classroom.

___

Kakashi spent the better part of a morning and afternoon on the end of his bed, his phone in his hand, staring at a number and a blank text box. This was absolutely ridiculous. He’s been living on his own for years, taking care of his damn self on the streets, picking fights and making his own rules as he goes.

Why the fuck couldn’t he send a text to Iruka?

He flopped back onto his bed with a groan, his arm over his eyes. This shouldn’t be hard! He’d already hit on Iruka. He’d already taken him home and made out with him. He’d touched his dick, for crying out loud. He should be able to send a goddamn text.

But what if it wasn’t the same? What if Kakashi was shit at flirting over texts? What if this wasn’t even Iruka’s number, and he’d gotten stood up after everything? Iruka had turned him down initially, after all. He was unpredictable. That was honestly one of the reasons Kakashi was so attracted to him in the first place.

What do you even _say_ to a person like Iruka, anyway? _“The look in your eyes when you demanded I take you home was the hottest thing I’d seen in years”_? _“I’ve never been on a date in my life, but if I don’t figure out why I can’t stop thinking about you I’m going to go nuts”_? Kakashi didn’t know shit about flirting etiquette, but he was pretty damn sure that both of those were coming on way too strong.

Kakashi scowled at his phone, huffing out a deep sigh. Man the fuck up, Kakashi. Just send something. Send anything. Start a goddamn conversation.

He bit his lip, typing out a sentence and hitting send before he could think about it any longer.

**Is this Iruka?**

He didn’t get a reply for at least twenty minutes. During those twenty minutes, he did not move from his spot on the bed. All the negative, nervous thoughts from before were threatening to come back tenfold, and he had to make a conscious effort to squash them.

He grabbed his phone embarrassingly quickly when he heard it buzz with a new text.

**_Maybe. Is this Kakashi?_ **

Kakashi smirked, typing a response without really thinking.

**Right in one, Princess**

**_I can and will block your number._ **

The response made Kakashi snort with laughter, a grin slowly spreading across his face. Okay, he could work with this. He knew how to flirt. At least, he knew how to pick people up. This couldn’t be that different, right?

He managed to get into the rhythm of the conversation much easier than he expected. Iruka was pretty easy to talk to. At least, he was until he asked what Kakashi had in mind for them. Did Kakashi have anything in mind at all? He didn’t know how shit like this was supposed to work. His only references for courtship were movie posters and the shitty porn novels he’d found in a box of old stuff outside an estate sale one time. None of those options seemed like something he should base a real-life flirting technique off of.

After several minutes of waffling, Kakashi eventually decided on honestly. Blunt, blatant honesty, and hoping Iruka found it…charming? Acceptable? Not the worst?

Kakashi bit the bullet.

**I’m gonna be honest. I’m not the best at this stuff. But I think at this point it would be okay to ask you to dinner sometime?**

Kakashi didn’t know how or when to ask someone to dinner. He didn’t know where to take someone to dinner, either. Would Iruka expect him to know? If he said yes (which was a big fucking if, Kakashi reminded himself) would he have…ideas about what dinner was supposed to be like? What it was supposed to mean? He probably wouldn’t even agree. They made out on the back of Kakashi’s bike once. That hardly was the most romantic precursor to a date Kakashi could think of.

**_I’m in. I gotta get back to work, but I’ll talk to you later._ **

Holy shit.

He agreed?

Kakashi’s head was reeling, but he found himself grinning all the same. Iruka wanted to see him again. He wasn’t even hard to talk to. And he _wanted_ to see Kakashi again. Someone wanted to go on an actual date with him.

Kakashi’s face fell slightly. He had absolutely no idea what an actual date was supposed to be like. Iruka had agreed to dinner, that much was a given. But where are people supposed to go to dinner? Kakashi wasn’t sure that most nice places in town would be so keen on letting him in. Hell, even some of the bad places in town probably wouldn’t be so keen on letting Kakashi in. Kakashi really only went to bars and convenience stores, and Iruka deserved better than either of those things. Kakashi had never felt self conscious about his lifestyle before, but he thought that maybe that might be what he was feeling now.

Kakashi chewed on his lower lip gently, turning the problem over in his brain. He briefly considered asking Tenzo for help, but ultimately decided that he couldn’t handle that much of Tenzo’s smug look. Gai certainly wouldn’t be any help. Anything he suggested would be way too much. He’d probably suggest proposing immediately. While worth a laugh, Kakashi needed real advice.

This was the problem with only really having two friends.

Kakashi paused for a few more seconds, before shooting up. He had one last person to ask. And he might not even get made fun of that much.

He pulled his jacket and boots on, grabbing a spare bandana from under his bed and doing his best to shake off the dust.

Kakashi’s last ditch effort to get some advice came in the form of his favorite and only coworker. Contrary to popular belief, he did have a job. It was shitty and part time, but paid enough for Kakashi to live. He’d worked in the same place since he was 13, arguably way too young to be working, but nobody looked too closely at him and he kept his mouth shut.

Kakashi worked in a tiny, run down pawn shop by the bar that he frequented. It wasn’t a good job by any means, but Kakashi wasn’t one to turn up his nose. Besides, he got along with the guy who ran the place, who didn’t mind hiring a cocky, troublesome brat who had more misdemeanors than school credits to his name.

He parked his bike in the alley as usual, pushing open the front door and pulling down his bandana. A cursory glance around the shop revealed it to be empty, and Kakashi frowned slightly as he moved towards the back of the store.

He was just about to reach the steel door that separated the store from the stockroom when it burst open, revealing a tall, tanned man with a beard and a confused expression.

“Kakashi? You work today?”

“Not today, Asuma,” Kakashi paused, attempting to phrase his question properly. “I actually came here to talk to you about something,”

Asuma raised an eyebrow, no small amount of surprise on his face. He grabbed a pack of cigarettes from behind the counter, motioning for Kakashi to follow him outside. They stood in the alley by Kakashi’s bike, Asuma lighting up and offering one to Kakashi.

“You aren’t quitting, are you?”

Kakashi rolled his eyes, accepting the cigarette and light before shaking his head.

“No, I’m not quitting. This is the only place around here that’d let a degenerate like me work,”

Asuma grinned, laughing. “And don’t you forget it. You’re not allowed to leave me alone working this dump. Well if you’re not leaving, what is it?”

“It’s…not about work,” Kakashi admitted, toeing the dirty pavement with an equally dirty boot. “It’s about personal stuff,”

Asuma’s brows knitted together, and he fixed Kakashi with a proper stare. “You aren’t in some kind of trouble, are you? Like real trouble?”

“No, nothing bad, I swear,” Kakashi rolled his eyes again. “Jesus, Asuma. Why do you always assume the worst about me?”

“Gee, I wonder,” Asuma answered dryly. “Spit it out, Hatake. What do you need?”

Kakashi sighed, dropping his cigarette and stepping on it. “Advice. About…a person,”

Asuma watched him silently, his face perfectly blank.

“About…how to talk to people? Like…if I wanted this person to not hate me,”

“Kakashi,” Asuma began, taking a long drag and letting a cloud of smoke out on a big sigh. “You wouldn’t, by any chance, be asking for dating advice?”

Kakashi felt his ears burn, but didn’t look away from Asuma’s knowing smirk.

“It’s not really—we haven’t been, like—Fuck, okay. Yes. That’s what I’m asking.” Kakashi muttered, shoving his hands deep into his jacket pockets. “I don’t know how to talk to people…like this,”

Asuma laughed. “And you think I do?”

Kakashi sighed, shrugging. “I dunno. More than I do, right? You have a girl,”

Asuma just laughed louder. “Yeah, fuck knows how that happened.”

“Asuma, c’mon,” Kakashi groaned. “I’m losing my mind here,”

That seemed to do the trick, or at least made Asuma take pity on him. He listened to Kakashi recount the events of the previous night, his eyes widening significantly at certain parts, but not interrupting. He left out details about what exactly transpired after the bar, for both of their sakes, but included the parts about the phone number and the bandana stealing. He’d just finished up telling Asuma about their text conversation earlier, running a hand through his hair distractedly.

“…And he agreed to see me again, for dinner, I guess? But I don’t have any idea how that’s supposed to work. Fuck, Asuma, I don’t even know why I like him. Or if that’s even what this is. We don’t _know_ each other,”

Asuma shrugged, seeming to take a moment to take in everything Kakashi told him. “Well…he seems like an interesting guy,” he supplied. “Definitely worth getting to know. That’s what first dates are for, Kakashi.”

“I know _that,_ ” Kakashi grumbled. “But I…I don’t know what to do. You know what it’s like here for me, I can’t exactly take him anywhere,”

“That’s fair,” Asuma murmured, his brows furrowing in thought. “Have you considered cooking? Or asking if he knows anywhere to go? Most people don’t exactly expect five star restaurants on the first date,”

Kakashi paused, thinking about that. He really hadn’t considered cooking. He had an extremely limited budget, and not a lot of space to work with. But he wasn’t a bad cook, perse. That might be okay.

“I guess so,” Kakashi looked up, considering Asuma for a few seconds. “If someone you’d hooked up with in a shady bar asked you to dinner, would you think it was weird?”

Asuma laughed aloud, nudging Kakashi teasingly. “If he thought it was weird, he wouldn’t have given his number, Kakashi. I think you’re in the clear here,”

Kakashi muttered his thanks, pulling his helmet back on when Asuma told him to either help out at the store or fuck off. He was distracted all the way home, mulling over what Asuma had told him. He was certain of at least two things.

He had a lot of cooking practice to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I finished planning out most of the story finally. So while the actual writing of chapters is still a WIP, I should hopefully be finished adding tags (and I have a preliminary chapter count!) Thank you all so much for your continued reviews, reading them absolutely makes my day.


	6. Chapter 6

Iruka stood up from his desk, stretching his arms above his head and wrinkling his nose up to suppress a yawn. He’d had a pretty long day, the kids seemed to have decided that a sleep-deprived Iruka was an exploitable Iruka, and that they should try to get away with all kinds of trouble today. He’d also stayed behind after class, to grade a few papers and write a few of his own. Most of the other student TAs had already left for the day, extending their usual invite for a drink to Iruka, which he politely declined. Same as every week, lately.

Kotetsu had lingered in the doorway for a little longer than usual this week, however. He’d caught Iruka’s eye for a few seconds, a strange expression on his face, before following the rest of the group out in silence.

Iruka sighed heavily, leaning against the edge of his desk. He’d managed to distract himself pretty well, but Kotetsu’s words from this morning were still weighing on his mind. Kotetsu had been one of the people who’d carried Iruka through Mizuki, sometimes almost literally. It made sense that he wanted Iruka to be cautious.

But, goddammit, Iruka had been cautious for _months_. He’d stopped going out for drinks with the other TAs, because he used to do that with Mizuki. He hadn’t dated, talked to, or hooked up with anyone. He’d basically closed his entire self off from people who weren’t his close friends, and he was tired of it. He was done being _cautious_. And he didn’t need Kotetsu or anyone else babying him, waiting on the sidelines to rescue him again. He was a grown-ass man, who could take care of himself, and go after what he wanted.

And right now, he wanted Kakashi.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket, his eyes quickly scanning back over their conversation from earlier. The fact that Kakashi had asked him to dinner made his stomach do a funny sort of flip, one he hadn’t felt in a really long time.

_Not since Mizuki._

The thought flashed through his mind before he could stop it. He shook his head quickly, biting his lip hard. This wasn’t the same as that. Kakashi wasn’t the same. He wasn’t going to let that bastard ruin everything good in his life, not anymore.

**So dinner, huh? Got a day in mind?**

He sent the text before he could talk himself out of it, shoving papers and his laptop into his bag in order to head home. He didn’t have a lot left to do for tomorrow, and he was feeling reckless. He’d been feeling reckless since last night, when he decided to follow Kakashi into the bar. The feeling was freeing.

**_Honestly, I didn’t even think I’d get this far_ **

**_Do you have a day in mind?_ **

Iruka laughed to himself, pulling his bag over his shoulder and starting to walk out of the school building. This version of Kakashi was a far cry from the trying-to-hard-to-be-suave Kakashi that he met outside the bar. He found that he really liked awkward-texting Kakashi.

**I mean. I just got off work. Are you busy now?**

His phone was silent in his hands for a few minutes as he walked, and anxiety was just barely starting to creep into the edges of his mind when he felt his phone vibrate again.

**_My schedule’s all clear_ **

Iruka grinned, typing out a response quickly.

**Great. You know where I live. Bring food?**

**This time, I can actually promise an invite in.**

**_I’ll be there in 20. Chinese or Indian?_ **

Iruka felt a swell of warmth through his chest, and he dutifully tried to ignore it as he practically skipped back to his apartment.

**Chinese. See ya soon.**

___

Kakashi stared, wide-eyed, at the text on his cell phone.

**_I mean. I just got off work. Are you busy now?_ **

Kakashi’s mind had gone completely, utterly blank. Now? As in, right now? He didn’t even really know how to go on a date. He considered it a lucky fluke that Iruka even agreed to a date with him. He didn’t expect to have to do anything about it so _soon_. But he wasn’t about to back down now.

**My schedule’s all clear**

**_Great. You know where I live. Bring food?_ **

Takeout. That, Kakashi could handle. He stood, pulling his jacket on when he felt another buzz from his phone.

**_This time, I can actually promise an invite in._ **

Kakashi grinned, snorting to himself.

**I’ll be there in 20. Chinese or Indian?**

**_Chinese. See ya soon._ **

Kakashi passed Tenzo on their couch on the way out, who raised an eyebrow at him suspiciously.

“Where you going in such a hurry? Are you late for work again?”

Kakashi rolled his eyes, purposefully avoiding eye contact with Tenzo.

“You always assume the worst from me, all of you. No, I’m…going to get food.” He mumbled, pulling his spare bandana on over his face.

Tenzo perked up a little, glancing at Kakashi hopefully. “Food? Anywhere good?”

Kakashi winced, feeling his cheeks heat up a little. Okay. He had two options. One was to lie, make some generic excuse, and leave Tenzo hanging. The other was to tell the truth, and submit himself to merciless teasing for god knows how long.

 “Yeah, the Chinese place. The good one. But Tenzo…I can’t bring you any,” He paused, shoving his hands deep into his jacket pockets, looking anywhere but his friend.

“I’m taking it to Iruka’s.”

Kakashi’s cheeks burned as a sly grin spread slowly across Tenzo’s face.

“Damn, okay. You were serious about this,” He paused, his smile softening into an expressing Kakashi wasn’t sure he’d ever seen on him before.

“Have fun. Don’t do anything you’d normally do,”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kakashi spluttered indignantly, grabbing his helmet and shoving it on. “Whatever. I’ll see you later.”

He slammed the door shut behind him, but not in time to cut off Tenzo’s call to “Use protection!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is very short, it's a little interlude chapter because it's happening, they're having a date! Thank you for all your feedback thus far, it makes my entire damn day. <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the last chapter was pretty short....so to compensate for that...I wrote six thousand words of a very indulgent date. Lmao. Enjoy!

Kakashi didn’t realize until he got inside the restaurant that he had no idea what kind of food Iruka liked.

In his defense, he only had a very brief moment of dissociative panic in line for Chinese takeout. Should he text and ask Iruka what he wanted? Should he guess? Should he just bring some food he liked and hope for the best?

Before he had really decided what the best course of action was, the lady at the counter was calling him up to order. His mind blanked for a split second, before he ordered on autopilot: the same he usually got for himself, Tenzo, and Gai, and another popular dish for good measure. It was no small amount of food, but better safe than sorry, right?

He hadn’t even gotten to Iruka’s house yet, and he was already blowing this whole date thing.

He took his absurd amount of takeout food, securing it to his bike and making his way towards the Shitty Apartment Block on 7th. The ride passed in a blur, Kakashi spending the entire time trying to squash the racing thoughts in his head. Iruka had invited him to his apartment. What did that mean? Obviously, it meant they were going to eat food. And probably talk. Get to know each other, like Asuma suggested.

But what happens after that? After last night’s interrupted hookup, was Iruka expecting anything else from him? Not that he wouldn’t be down, he absolutely would. But he would also be down to just…hang out? He didn’t know a lot about dating, but he knew that people generally said the words “sex on the first date” with no small amount of scorn. But honestly, did that still hold true if the first date came _after_ a botched one night stand?

This would be so much easier if there was a rule book, or something.

He parked beside Iruka’s building, pulling off his helmet and grabbing his phone from his back pocket.

**I’m outside with food**

**_You can come on in. I’m on the 2nd floor on the left, room 211._ **

Kakashi let out a deep breath, grabbing the bag of takeout and looking up at the building in front of him. Here goes absolutely nothing, right?

He walked inside the big double doors of the lobby, his heavy boots echoing loudly on the shiny tile floor. He quickly found the stairwell, taking it up a flight and landing in front of a plaque of room numbers and arrows. He followed the arrow labeled _201-219_ down the hallway, until he was standing in front of room 211.

He checked his phone again, at least twice more, making sure the numbers on the screen matched the numbers on the door. He really didn’t know what he would do if he knocked on the wrong one.

Once he was as certain as he could be that he was in the right place, he pulled down his bandana, took in a breath, and knocked.

___

Iruka sighed as he entered his apartment, slipping his shoes off and letting his bag hit the floor by his front door. He slipped his hairtie off, shaking his hair out and massaging his scalp lightly. He leaned against his door, his eyes scanning his small apartment quickly. He kept it pretty clean habitually, nothing out of place besides a few of his papers on the coffee table and an old cereal bowl in the sink. Perfectly presentable.

Which meant he couldn’t really distract himself with cleaning.

He pushed himself off the door, pausing by the doorway to his bedroom. Should he make the bed? Would that be presumptuous? Or was it just hopeful? Would Kakashi expect to sleep with him?

And, whether Kakashi expected it or not, did Iruka want to?

Iruka shook his head, closing the door to his bedroom and flopping down on his couch. He was being stupid. He needed to stop letting his anxiety run wild with this…Kakashi was coming over, they were going to eat dinner together…and whatever happened after that was gonna happen. Iruka was just here for the ride.

He was pulled from his thoughts by a buzz from his phone.

**_I’m outside with food_ **

Iruka’s eyes widened a little, and he felt his breath catch slightly. This was real now, this…date? This whatever it was, with Kakashi.

**You can come on in. I’m on the 2nd floor on the left, room 211.**

Iruka shoved his phone into his pocket, sitting up and running his hands through his hair. He had absolutely no reason to be this nervous. He’d already kissed, straddled, and marked Kakashi enough that awkwardness would just be laughable. But the context of this meeting was so wildly different, it was almost more nerve-wracking than a normal first date. And that just wasn’t fair.

A loud, sharp knock interrupted Iruka’s musings and he startled a little, cursing himself inwardly for being so jumpy. He pulled his front door open, taking a moment to take in the sight.

Kakashi was there, still in his heavy boots, tight dark jeans, and worn leather jacket. The bandana Iruka stole was replaced with another more wrinkled and faded one, pulled down around his neck to expose his face. His bike helmet was tucked under one arm, the other arm holding a large bag of takeout.

“Uh…hey,”

Kakashi greeted him, holding up the takeout in offering.

Iruka broke into an easy smile, eyeing the bag before stepping back to offer Kakashi entrance.

“That’s…a lot of food,”

Kakashi’s ears turned pink as he let Iruka take the bag, his arm coming up to rub the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Well, I…I kind of panicked in the restaurant when I realized I had no idea what kind of food you liked. So I just…guessed. A few different things,”

Iruka laughed, peering inside the bag at the multiple containers of entrees and rice. This was such a different man from the Kakashi Iruka had met the night before. It was hard to picture Kakashi Hatake awkwardly admitting to something as mundane as over-buying takeout because he didn’t know what kind Iruka would like, but here he was; slouched in Iruka’s foyer, blushing about Chinese food.

Goddammit. Iruka just might swoon.

“I’m certainly not gonna complain about too much food.  It all smells incredible,” Iruka dropped the bag on his small kitchen table, making his way to his cabinets for plates. “You can make yourself at home,”

Kakashi moved to sit at the table, draping his jacket over the back of his chair and starting to pull containers from the plastic bag. He accepted Iruka’s offer for water, accepting the glass along with the plate Iruka handed him.

“I’m gonna use the chopsticks, but do you want a fork or anything?” Iruka offered.

“Yes, please,” Kakashi murmured. “I make a goddamn mess when I eat with chopsticks,”

“Has anyone ever showed you how to use them?” Iruka asked, passing Kakashi a fork before sitting down opposite him.

Kakashi shrugged, opening a container of rice.

“Tenzo makes fun of me about it, sometimes, does that count?”

Iruka rolled his eyes, pulling a container towards himself.

“No, probably not. Anyway, tell me what you got,”

“Right,” Kakashi put the rice down, gesturing to each container with his fork. “This is garlic beef and broccoli, that one’s kung pao chicken, that’s General Tso’s chicken, and that’s pork fried rice and veggies.”

“Nice,” Iruka nodded appreciatively. “Good selections, all.”

“Oh, good,” Kakashi visibly relaxed, smiling a little. “Next time I’ll be able to get your favorite,”

Iruka stilled, looking up at Kakashi with a small smile. Next time, huh?

Iruka and Kakashi served themselves with some more idle small talk, filling their plates and settling into comfortable silence to eat. Iruka, forgetting that he only managed to eat half of his lunch, realized that he had become ravenously hungry over the course of the day. After Iruka had cleared his entire first helping and was about to reach for another, he paused to pull his hair away from his face. He stuck his hairtie in his mouth and pulled half his hair up into a messy bun, leaving some down around the back of his neck, pausing when he felt Kakashi’s eyes on him.

“You wore a turtleneck to work,” Kakashi observed, the barest hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

The hairtie fell from Iruka’s mouth and he felt heat rise in his cheeks.

“I—My boss would have—shut up,” Iruka stammered, watching as Kakashi’s satisfied grin only grew. He grabbed his hairtie from his lap, tying his hair up quickly and shooting Kakashi a glare. The effect was only partially muted by his burning cheeks.

“You didn’t fare much better than I did,” Iruka pointed out, raising an eyebrow.

“Maybe so, but I didn’t have to work today. Not that my boss would have cared,” Kakashi shrugged. “Where do you work, anyway, that it’d be a big deal?”

“Oh, I work as a TA at the elementary school twice a week,” Iruka laughed a little, rubbing his neck absent mindedly. “You could imagine…the scandal in the teachers’ lounge if I had a neck full of visible hickies. My hair is almost too much for some of the PTA moms,” he rolled his eyes.

Kakashi laughed at that, shaking his head a little.

“PTA moms are fucking crazy, then.”

“That’s the general agreement,” Iruka nodded. “Seriously, I’m only glad I don’t have parent-teacher conferences to deal with. Not yet, anyway.”

“So, you want to teach, then? Any subject in particular?” Kakashi asked.

Iruka shrugged, piling some more food onto his plate.

“My focus is in history, technically. But I’m on a general education track for elementary and middle schools.” He paused. “I really want to teach middle school.”

Kakashi cocked his head a little, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah? How come middle school, specifically?”

Iruka paused, considering his answer carefully. It’s not that he hadn’t already thought about it before, of course he had. But he didn’t usually put it into words for other people.

“When I was in middle school,” Iruka began, twirling one of his chopsticks in his fingers. “I…I was going through some shit. And I don’t think I would have gotten through it without one of my teachers being there for me and listening to me,” He paused, biting his lower lip gently. “It really meant a lot to me. And I feel like…that sort of thing…I want to be able to do that. I want to make a difference to kids, you know?”

Iruka looked up from his plate, his breath catching in his throat when he met Kakashi’s gaze. The look in Kakashi’s eyes was strange; intense in a way but also incredibly soft. It made heat start to creep up Iruka’s neck and cheeks again, and he quickly glanced back down to his hands.

“So…yeah. That’s…that’s my spiel,” he murmured, suddenly self-conscious.

“I think that’s really awesome,” Kakashi murmured.

Iruka looked back up. Kakashi was looking down at his plate, pushing a piece of beef around distractedly.

“I…also went through some shit when I was young. Real young,” Kakashi shrugged. “And I wish I had a teacher like you around then. Someone who cared for the students like you do,”

Iruka smiled, ducking his head a little at the praise.

“Yeah…we’ll see if I’m actually any good at it,” He laughed. “All these good intentions don’t mean shit if I can’t cut it as a teacher,”

Kakashi let out a scoff, rolling his eyes.

“Cute and humble. What are you doing with a loser like me, anyway?”

Iruka raised his eyebrows at the compliment, smirking a little.

“The wholesome teacher-types always go for bad boys, right?”

Kakashi snorted, rolling his eyes.

“Yeah, except ‘wholesome teacher-type’ didn’t pick me up at the bar last night,” he teased.

Iruka grinned. “What, I can’t have layers?”

“No, I’m glad you do,” Kakashi smiled fondly, leaning back in his seat to study Iruka. “You’re…you’re a really interesting person, Iruka,” he murmured.

Iruka flushed, shrugging modestly. “Look who’s telling me,” he challenged. “Nobody in this town can stop talking about you,”

Kakashi rolled his eyes. “Yeah, and most of that’s fantasy bullshit. You believe any of it?”

Iruka smirked. “Only the ones about how hot you are. Experienced those firsthand,”

Iruka grinned as Kakashi flushed bright pink. It was about goddamn time he started evening the score a little.

“I…didn’t realize there were many of those,” Kakashi muttered, avoiding Iruka’s eyes.

Iruka laughed. “Oh, plenty. Only some of them were exaggerating. Some didn’t even do you justice,”

“Oh my god,” Kakashi groaned, shaking his head a little. “Stop. I don’t want to know.”

Iruka hummed, folding his arms and smirking. “But I know some good ones. Like how good of a kisser you are, or how—”

“Please, for the love of all that is holy, don’t,” Kakashi pleaded weakly. “I don’t even want to know what people say about it. Do people really talk about this a lot?”

Iruka giggled, full-on giggled, finally taking pity on Kakashi.

“No, not really. I made some of that up.” He paused. “But if there was something you wanted me to start—”

Kakashi cut him off with a long groan of _“Nooo,”_ Iruka dissolving into delighted laughter.

He was definitely going to enjoy this particular power.

___

Kakashi had never had such frequent impulses to pinch himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming.

He had spent the better part of his evening at Iruka’s at his kitchen table, just listening to Iruka talk. Iruka was fantastic to listen to. Kakashi could already tell that he had a habit of going on tangents, and the more excited he was about any given subject, the more animated he got in both facial expression and flappy hand motions. Kakashi could listen to him talk for hours. In fact, he just might have already done just that.

He’d learned a lot about Iruka in that time, topics ranging from the really good book he read a month ago to his most exciting stories from his elementary schoolers. Kakashi was currently being told, in great detail, about a particularly amusing time in Iruka’s upper-level history seminar when the professor over-pronounced foreign words so comically that the entire student population spent a fruitless two hours trying to get him to speak correctly.

Kakashi hadn’t talked much, but he didn’t mind. He wasn’t generally a very talkative person, and he was content where he was; his chin resting on his hand, watching Iruka as he recounted even the most mundane events with such earnest excitement that Kakashi was utterly enraptured.

Eventually, however, Iruka seemed to be catching on to the fact that he’d spent the better part of an hour monologuing to Kakashi. His cheeks grew pink and he stilled his hands in his lap, laughing a little and shrugging.

“Sorry, I…You can tell me to shut up if I get annoying. I ramble a lot, and I don’t want you to—You can talk, if you want,” Iruka offered, suddenly much more shy.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, not moving from his position.

“Do I seem annoyed?” he asked, genuinely curious.

Iruka glanced towards his lap, fiddling his fingers together. “I dunno. You just…are kinda staring?”

Oh. _Oh._ Of course. Kakashi had been almost completely still, only moving to take sips of his drink or to offer small interjections to Iruka’s stories. He’d been so happy to listen, it probably looked like he’d been spacing out.

“Iruka, I wasn’t zoning out. I…didn’t mean to stare. But you get so into your stories, it’s cute,” Kakashi admitted. Hell, being honest had gotten him this far, why should he stop? “Nothing about this is annoying.”

Iruka flushed darker, but beamed happily with Kakashi’s statement. Kakashi wondered briefly if Iruka was often told that his excited rambles were annoying. Kakashi had a sudden urge to find anyone who ever called Iruka annoying, and give them a piece of his mind.

“Still…I’ve been talking so long. You should tell me some stuff about you,” Iruka suggested, meeting Kakashi’s gaze again.

Kakashi’s eye widened a little, and he sat up a bit straighter. Iruka wanted to know about him? He supposed that only made sense. The only things Iruka had to go off of were half-baked rumors and a one-night stand. He supposed he was entitled to a bit more information.

But where the hell was Kakashi supposed to start? A lot of Kakashi’s personal life was buried pretty deep, for good reason. Hardly first date material.

“Well, I, uh,” Kakashi ran a hand through his hair distractedly. “I don’t really know what to tell you,”

“The same kinda stuff I told you,” Iruka laughed softly. “You know…first date stuff. Where you work, what you’re hobbies are, likes and dislikes.”

Kakashi paused, thinking that over. He could probably give Iruka that sort of information without divulging a lot of the less-happy stuff.

“Well…I work in a kind of seedy pawn shop, not far from the bar,” Kakashi shrugged. “I worked there for years. Started when I was way to young, probably,”

“Yeah? Do you like working there?” Iruka asked.

“I guess, no complaints,” Kakashi paused. “It’s hardly the kind of job you dream about having, but it pays enough and the guy who owns the store is cool.”

“Nice,” Iruka smiled. “Honestly, that’s all you can ask for with jobs sometimes,”

Kakashi let out a laugh on a huff of air. “Yeah, I guess so.” He paused. “Honestly, I don’t do very much. I go to work, I ride with Tenzo and Gai. I just kind of…get by, I guess. Work on my bike in my spare time,”

“Work on your bike?” Iruka asked. “Sorry, I don’t really know shit about motorcycles. What about it needs work?”

“Well, nothing really,” Kakashi laughed. “But like…you work on it for aesthetics. Or to add shit onto it that it doesn’t need but would just be cool, you know?”

Iruka grinned, shaking his head a little. “So you’re telling me, you’re every fictional depiction of a high school greaser come to life?”

“You could say that,” Kakashi smirked. “When I was younger, more so. I went to sketchy races and got in fights. I thought I was real fuckin’ cool,”

Iruka’s eyes widened, and his grin only grew. “You raced? Damn…what was that like?”

“Stupid,” Kakashi answered honestly. “It was illegal, and dirty, and dangerous, and _so_ much fun,” he admitted, grinning somewhat wistfully. “I miss it sometimes. But it’s hard to keep a low enough profile now, and I’ve gotten nabbed by cops enough for a lifetime,” he rolled his eyes. “One you turn 18, it really starts to become a bother.”

“I really wouldn’t know,” Iruka replied, shrugging. “I’ve been boring my whole life. I think the closest I’ve come to that level of excitement was pulling mad pranks in middle school,”

“Oh, I definitely want stories about that,”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “Like my stories about being a bratty 12-year-old would be half as exciting as stories about illegal motorbike races,”

“You’d be surprised,” Kakashi shrugged. “Races don’t always go to shit. And you seem the type to pull some fantastic pranks.”

“Fine. I’ll share stories about my delinquency if you share stories about yours.”

“Fair enough deal,” Kakashi agreed. He chewed on his lower lip gently, lost in thought about where to begin. He spent a good couple of years part of the racing scene, not all of it was stuff he was so willing to share this early.

“Well, uh…I got my first bike when I was sixteen. It was so terrible. The piece of shit barely ran,” he laughed a little at the memory. “But I was proud as hell. I’d saved up for it starting at age fourteen. I spent pretty much every waking hour that I wasn’t at work trying to restore it.” He shook his head, smiling fondly. “The first race I entered in, I got completely obliterated. I thought I knew shit about the racing scene, but I had no fucking clue. I wasn’t ready for how rough people got, it damn near destroyed my bike.”

“You crashed?” Iruka asked, his eyes wide.

“Kind of?” Kakashi wrinkled his nose. “I mean, I definitely crashed. But because I was forced to,”

Iruka looked at him quizzically.

“See, I didn’t know that it’s near suicidal to enter in a race just by yourself,” Kakashi explained. “People form gangs. Those races are all part of the display of power for them. And I was the twiggy-ass kid who entered all alone. No better target to flaunt power at,” he rolled his eyes. “They probably would have wiped the floor with me if they had come at me on a regular day. But I was fucking _pissed_ about the bike. Got me fighting real dirty. I came away almost unscathed, pride intact, and an in to the next race.”

“Holy shit,” Iruka said appreciatively.

“Yeah,” Kakashi agreed. “I found out that you could win shit at these races, money and favors and reputations and the like. So I started to get real invested. It’s how I met Tenzo and Gai—those were the guys with me last night—I met Tenzo real early, he hung around the races a lot but didn’t have a bike. We stuck to each other like glue.”

“Which one’s Tenzo, bowl cut or mullet?” Iruka asked.

Kakashi laughed aloud at that, shooting Iruka a wide grin.

“Mullet. And I’m so glad you see it too, he won’t listen when I tell him to cut it,”

“Eh, he pulls it off,” Iruka grinned.

“Nobody pulls that hair off. But anyway, we started riding together. We managed to swindle a wrecked bike off somebody, and scavenged enough for parts that we got him something that at least drove. We met Gai a couple years in, his bike was actually heads and shoulders above ours. So we took turns racing with his. We got good enough that people started to try and muscle us out of the matches, which is probably around the time people started spreading the stupid rumors about the three of us being scary,” Kakashi rolled his eyes.

Iruka raised an eyebrow. “You all were never scary?”

“Not by a fucking long shot,” Kakashi laughed. “We weren’t even the scariest group around. We ran with the rumors because we thought they were funny. People made such a big deal out of the smallest shit, like my eye or my bandana, said we weren’t afraid to start fights,” he shook his head slowly. “I think the only fight I ever started was ‘cause I saw some dumbass pissing on Gai’s bike once,”

Iruka laughed, long and loud, and Kakashi let him take a few minutes to collect himself. Was the idea of him not being some tough guy really that funny?

“I’m sorry,” Iruka managed to get out through giggles. “I just…people say so much…and thinking about the shit I’ve heard, after spending time with you like this. It’s so funny,”

Kakashi shrugged. “Honestly, I’ve stopped keeping track of shit people say. Once it started getting cops on my ass, the novelty wore off.”

“That’s fair,” Iruka conceded. “But have you heard the one where you cut your own eye out and made your gang eat it to prove their loyalty?”

Kakashi’s brow furrowed, and he shot Iruka a confused look. “What do you mean? That one’s entirely true.”

Both Kakashi and Iruka only managed to keep their faces neutral for about three seconds after that statement. Both men dissolved completely into inconsolable laughter, Kakashi falling into renewed hysterics after witnessing Iruka clap his hand over his mouth in response to snorting loudly.

Holy _shit_ , Iruka was the most attractive person Kakashi had ever met.

They both eventually calmed down, Kakashi brushing away tears that had formed in his eye. He was pretty sure he could count on one hand the amount of times he’d laughed this hard while still sober.

 Iruka, upon regaining his composure, made a move to start cleaning up the food. Kakashi quickly moved to help, brushing off Iruka’s insistence that he sit.

“You brought the food, you did your part,” Iruka protested as Kakashi took his own dirty dishes to the sink. “I’ll clean,”

“Sure I brought food, but I’m also invading your house.” Kakashi countered. “And I’ll clean my own mess.”

Iruka huffed, grabbing his own plate and joining Kakashi at the sink, hip-checking him to the side so they both had room. Kakashi stumbled slightly to the side, his eye widening.

“No fair, using my blind spot against me,” he murmured, nudging Iruka gently in return.

“Well I wouldn’t have had to, if you weren’t being stubborn,” Iruka retorted, smirking a little.

Kakashi snorted softly, rolling his eyes and flicking some of the water from the faucet at Iruka, who squeaked softly in surprise and dropped the chopsticks he was holding. Kakashi couldn’t contain his laughter at the reaction, and probably should have expected the facefull of warm water he received in retaliation.

“Oh, you’re getting it now,” Kakashi grinned, pushing his dripping hair out of his face. He watched as Iruka’s eyes darted from Kakashi’s face to the detachable faucet sprayer, widening slightly in fear.

“Oh, shi—”

The curse was cut off by a loud yelp as Kakashi grabbed the sprayer, Iruka throwing his arms up to shield his face as Kakashi completely soaked him down. Iruka searched desperately for a way to retaliate, his fingers closing around a half-empty water glass from dinner. He grinned, picking it up and throwing the contents onto Kakashi, who dropped the sprayer in an ill-timed attempt to protect his face.

Kakashi cursed under his breath as Iruka dove for the sprayer, reaching for it just a hair’s breath too late. The two of them grappled with it for a few minutes, both grunting and laughing and getting completely and totally soaked. Kakashi could only comply when he felt Iruka’s hand on his chest, the warm pressure a stark contrast from the cold, wet shirt clinging to his skin, pushing him back until his hips were flush against the counter. Iruka crowded closer, both men dropping the sprayer as Iruka wrapped his arm around Kakashi’s neck to pull him into a hard kiss.

Kakashi’s hands were at Iruka’s hips in an instant, holding him close as he let out a satisfied sigh against Iruka’s lips. Kissing Iruka was even better than he remembered, it was warm and soft and it pulled a low, needy noise from the back of Kakashi’s throat.

He felt Iruka smirk against his lips, pressing up on his toes to get closer to Kakashi. Kakashi smoothed his hands up Iruka’s back, his damp shirt catching on his hands and pulling up to expose some of Iruka’s skin, causing him to shiver.

Iruka pulled away slowly, his eyes blinking open to meet Kakashi’s gaze. His cheeks were tinged pink and the corners of his mouth were quirked up in a shy smile that tugged Kakashi in like a fishhook to the gut. Iruka slid his hand from Kakashi’s neck down his arm, gently guiding his wrist until Kakashi’s fingers slid under the hem of his shirt. He held Kakashi’s gaze steadily, catching his lower lip between his teeth and pressing Kakashi’s hand against his skin before returning his hand to Kakashi’s jaw, pulling him in and connecting their lips again.

Kakashi understood the wordless invitation, only briefly hesitating before letting his fingers move over the bare skin of Iruka’s hip, feeling goosebumps erupt wherever they went. What began as tentative exploration got bolder as they kept kissing, Kakashi’s hand slipping higher under Iruka’s shirt as their tongues twisted together lazily.

Kakashi’s fingers brushed over Iruka’s nipple which earned him a sharp gasp and a soft whimper, causing him to repeat the action with equally encouraging results. He circled the nipple with his fingertip teasingly, reveling in the shaky whine it pulled from Iruka.

“Ah, ‘Kashi!” Iruka pulled back with a soft cry when Kakashi pinched at his nipple, his head dropping forward onto Kakashi’s shoulder as his fingers continued their teasing under his shirt.

“Yeah?” Kakashi murmured, licking his lips as he felt Iruka’s fingers twist into his hair.

“Mmh…s’good,” Iruka breathed against his neck, his lips brushing teasingly over the sensitive skin. Kakashi let out a soft groan, before pressing forward and flipping their position.

Iruka let himself be pressed back against the counter, Kakashi’s hands sliding down his sides to squeeze his ass gently, drawing out a low moan.

Kakashi smirked, nuzzling into Iruka’s neck.

“Lift up,” he whispered, sending shivers down Iruka’s spine at both the sensation of breath on his ear but also at the memory from the previous night. Kakashi felt Iruka’s arms tighten around his neck and he gripped Iruka’s ass firmly, lifting him quickly to sit atop the kitchen counter.

Kakashi slid easily between Iruka’s legs, running his hands up Iruka’s thighs and up under his damp shirt to brush his fingers over his hips. Iruka pressed into the touch, his fingers running through Kakashi’s hair, guiding him closer.

Kakashi smiled up at Iruka, leaning close to brush their lips together before twisting his fingers in the hem of Iruka’s shirt.

“May I?”

He breathed the question against Iruka’s lips, pulling back just enough to meet Iruka’s heated gaze. Iruka nodded, biting down on his lower lip and releasing Kakashi’s hair as his hands ran up over Iruka’s torso, pulling his shirt along with it.

Kakashi dropped Iruka’s shirt on the floor beside him, letting his gaze rove over every new inch of exposed skin. His hands followed the trail blazed by his eye, and he watched his fingers move over smooth, tan skin as if entranced by it.

Kakashi let his hands drop to Iruka’s hips, pressing forward to nuzzle against Iruka’s neck, kissing over the marks he’d left the night before. His mouth trailed downwards, across Iruka’s collarbones and chest, and he caught Iruka’s gaze before slowly swirling his tongue across Iruka’s nipple.

Iruka let out a high-pitched moan, arching into the touch and digging his fingernails into Kakashi’s shoulder. He felt like Kakashi was lighting his skin on fire with every touch, and he felt caught between wanting it to last forever and needing Kakashi to just stop _teasing_ before he went mad.

Kakashi smirked, before closing his lips around Iruka’s nipple and sucking. Iruka whined loudly, his hips twitching forward and his eyes screwing shut.

“Fuck, Kakashi!” Iruka gasped out, his breath coming out harsh as Kakashi pulled off him with a soft, wet noise. His jaw went slack as Kakashi trailed his mouth lower, sinking to his knees between Iruka’s legs and biting down just below Iruka’s bellybutton. Iruka ran his hands through Kakashi’s hair, unable to tear his eyes away from the sight of Kakashi on his knees in front of him. The look he trained up at Iruka was almost reverent, and he nuzzled his face against the inside of Iruka’s shaking thigh with a small smirk.

Iruka’s fingers tightened in Kakashi’s hair, unconsciously tugging him closer. Kakashi was only too happy to oblige, gripping Iruka’s hips tightly as he placed a light kiss at the prominent bulge in Iruka’s jeans.

Kakashi looked up in response to Iruka’s soft whimper. “Okay?” he asked.

Iruka bit down on his lip hard and nodded, not trusting his voice. He was rewarded with a wicked grin from Kakashi, who’s thin fingers moved to deftly undo the button and fly of his jeans.

Iruka let his head fall back against his cabinets with a string of whispered curses when Kakashi actually got his mouth on him, Kakashi’s hands on his hips the only thing keeping him from bucking right off the counter. Kakashi chuckled low in his throat, wasting no time in rendering Iruka a flushed, babbling mess with his tongue. Iruka squirmed and writhed against Kakashi’s hands, biting down on the back of his own hand in an attempt to stifle some of the noises he was making. He let one eye blink open when he felt Kakashi move away from him, whining weakly in protest.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, reaching up to tangle his fingers with Iruka’s, taking his hand away from his mouth.

“Don’t. I want to hear,” He murmured, kissing the inside of Iruka’s wrist gently before leaning forward to take Iruka back into his mouth. He could barely contain his smirk when Iruka moaned loudly, both hands tugging sharply at Kakashi’s hair.

“Fuck, Kakashi,” Iruka moaned hoarsely. “S-so good, I—ah, fuck, don’t stop—!”

Kakashi moaned softly around him, his eyes slipping shut, letting himself get lost in the feel of Iruka’s hands in his hair and the sounds of pleasure he was drawing from him. Kakashi felt every noise Iruka made through his entire body, every moan and whimper spurring him on with an intensity he didn’t think he could even begin to describe.

It wasn’t long before Iruka tensed under him, his hips arching off the counter as he cried Kakashi’s name loudly, before slumping back against the cabinets, boneless from his release.

Kakashi pulled off him slowly, tugging Iruka’s boxers and jeans back over him gently, standing and wiping his mouth off on the back of his hand with a self-satisfied smirk. Iruka blinked his eyes open slowly, pushing his hair off of his flushed and sweaty face with a lazy grin.

Iruka pulled Kakashi close by the front of his shirt, his hands trailing down his torso as they kissed deep and slow. He dropped his hand down past Kakashi’s waistband, fully intending to return the favor, when Kakashi shied away with a weak noise.

Iruka pulled away, looking up at Kakashi with confusion. He was met with Kakashi’s pink cheeks and an averted gaze, and he shrugged a shoulder awkwardly.

“I’m, uh. I’m good,” he murmured, shifting his hips a little. When that statement was met only by more confusion from Iruka, his flush deepened considerably.

“You don’t want—?”

Kakashi winced a little, his hand coming up to rub the back of his neck in what Iruka was beginning to recognize as a nervous tic.

“No, that’s not—I…I’m _good_ ,” Kakashi repeated, clearly embarrassed. “You, uh. You were really into it, and that was really hot, and, uh…”

Iruka’s eyes widened. _Oh._

A slow grin spread across Iruka’s face, and he giggled before he could stop himself.

“You…from listening to me?” he asked, pulling Kakashi closer.

Kakashi groaned softly, letting his head fall onto Iruka’s shoulder.

“Yeah. Shut up,”

“Fat chance,” Iruka teased, wrapping his arms around Kakashi’s neck. “You know, that’s kind of hot.”

“Spare me,” Kakashi mumbled, rolling his eyes before standing up again.

Iruka laughed, slipping off the counter and giving Kakashi a quick peck on the nose.

“Okay, okay. But only because we made an even bigger mess to clean,”

Kakashi laughed too, looking around at Iruka’s small kitchen. He was right, there were puddles of water everywhere, one of which contained Iruka’s soaked shirt. Their food was still sitting on the table, and neither of their dishes got washed.

Iruka stretched his arms over his head, surveying the damage with a small sigh.

“C’mon. I’ll put our wet stuff in the dryer. I’m sure I have a tshirt or something that’d fit you while they dry,” Iruka paused, his eyes sliding purposefully over Kakashi’s torso before back up to meet his gaze. “But only if you want it,”

Kakashi grinned, pulling his wet shirt over his head and handing it to Iruka.

“Up to you, Princess,” he teased. Iruka snorted.

“As tempting as it would be to watch you mop my floors shirtless, I’ll be back with a shirt for you,” he replied, leaving with both their shirts dripping a trail to his laundry room.

___

The two of them spent the rest of the evening cleaning up Iruka’s kitchen and lounging on the couch in two of Iruka’s big tshirts. And if the _ding_ of the dryer was ignored in favor of exchanging lazy kisses over the quiet din of the TV, that was nobody’s business but theirs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boy howdy was this chapter an absolute doozy to write. But they had a successful first date! Thanks to everyone who's been leaving kudos and comments, they make my day every time, I love reading you guys' reactions to the story. <3


	8. Chapter 8

It had been weeks (10, not that Iruka was counting) since he’d awoken early in the morning on his own couch, with Kakashi sleeping half-draped on top of him. In that time, he hadn’t gone more than a couple of days at a time without seeing Kakashi. They ate dinner together at least three times a week, and Kakashi was a frequent overnight guest at his apartment on weekends.

Iruka was on cloud nine, and everyone could tell.

The only problem was, Iruka refused to admit it.

Sure, he was happy with Kakashi, he’d admit that much. Kakashi was smart, and funny, and sweet. He was a good listener and an even better kisser. A part of Iruka spent every minute they were apart just waiting for when they could be together again, and when they were together Iruka felt so warm and full and just _happy_. The last time they had been together, the thought had crossed his mind that he might be falling in love with Kakashi.

That thought brought with it such a jumble of turbulent emotions, he’d spaced out in the middle of whatever it was that Kakashi was saying to him and needed to ask him to repeat what he’d been saying for the past two minutes.

No. He couldn’t be in love with Kakashi. That would be ridiculous. They’d only met a few months ago (two and a half, Iruka swore he wasn’t counting) and besides, Iruka wasn’t going to fall in love. Not yet. He wasn’t anywhere near ready to, so he absolutely was not doing that. And that was final.

But Iruka was scared. He was scared he was doing it anyway. And that was probably the most terrifying thing he could think to happen, falling in love with Kakashi. Love made him stupid. It made him turn a blind eye to things that he should never have turned a blind eye to. He trusted Kakashi, of course he did. But trust was a mistake he’d made before, after all. It was something he’d never let himself forget.

Despite the war he was waging against his own brain, he would admit that he and Kakashi were, for lack of a better term, “getting serious”. Neither of them had used the word “boyfriend” yet, but it was getting harder and harder to avoid. Iruka knew he couldn’t get away with telling his classmates and coworkers that Kakashi was just “a guy he’d met at a bar” for much longer, but putting a name on it brought a lot of expectations. Iruka didn’t know if Kakashi wanted those expectations.

Iruka sighed, pushing the thoughts out of his head for the umpteenth time that week. He’d have plenty of time to think about that later, this morning, he had shit to do.

He’d been so caught up these past few weeks, both from school and from Kakashi, that he felt he’d been neglecting a lot of people in his life. Anko had brushed it off when he’d mentioned it to her, saying that she was just happy watching Iruka be happy from afar (her opinion on the matter hadn’t been solidified until she ran into the two of them as they were returning to Iruka’s apartment after a night out. The three of them proceeded to come into Iruka’s to have tea, per Anko’s insistence that she would not leave until she “found out what Kakashi’s intentions were.”) and that he shouldn’t worry about her.

If he was being honest, it wasn’t really Anko that Iruka was feeling guilty about. And as much as he enjoyed spending time with Kakashi, he wanted a break from thinking about it. His emotions could use some time to unwind.

Which is how Iruka came to spend an entire Saturday in, barely sparing a passing thought to his love life.

That was, until his love life knocked on his door.

“Kakashi,” Iruka blurted out, after staring in surprised silence for several seconds. “Hi…I didn’t know you were coming over,”

Kakashi’s eyebrow rose, and he shot Iruka a small smile. “You didn’t?”

Iruka felt heat creeping up his face. Maybe his plan to not think about Kakashi backfired on him after all.

“I…forgot some plans, didn’t I?” He asked sheepishly, to which Kakashi laughed in response.

“Not a big deal,” Kakashi shrugged. “I don’t mind reminding you,”

“Iruka, who the hell’s this?”

The shrill voice cut through their conversation, and Iruka’s eyes grew wide. Kakashi’s eyebrow only rose higher, and he peered around Iruka’s shoulder to try and find the source of the voice.

“Am I interrupting something?”

“Uh, no,” Iruka shook his head, stepping back to allow Kakashi room to enter. “I mean, not really. This is, uh. I—”

“Iruka! Seriously, who is this guy? He’s weird,”

“Naruto!” Iruka scolded, bristling a little at the blonde boy who’d come off the couch to join him by the door. “Didn’t I teach you any manners?”

Kakashi just blinked down at the kid, looking from him to Iruka and then back slowly.

“I, uh. Didn’t know you…had a kid..?” the statement came out much more like a question, Kakashi’s voice a lot weaker than Iruka had ever heard before. He felt himself flush.

“No, Kakashi, I don’t have a kid. This…this is Naruto. Naruto, this is Kakashi. He’s—” Iruka paused, looking up and meeting Kakashi’s eye. “He’s…a friend of mine,” he finished, quieter than before. Kakashi only shrugged in response, turning to face Naruto again in greeting.

“Hey,”

Naruto all but glared back up at Kakashi, wrinkling his nose. “Iruka, don’t tell me you’re going on a date with this weirdo,”

“Naruto!” Iruka groaned, covering his eyes with his hand. This definitely was not how he wanted this day to go. He’d planned on telling Naruto about Kakashi sometime, just not today. And certainly not like this.

“You deserve better, Iruka.” Naruto muttered decisively.

Kakashi grinned, shrugging a shoulder. “You’re probably right, kid.”

“Oh, shut up,” Iruka rolled his eyes. “Yes, Naruto, I’m going to go on a date with him. No, you can’t talk me out of it. Don’t give me that look, I spent all day with you.”

“But Irukaaa,” Naruto whined, pouting up at him. “We haven’t hung out in ages, and I bet you see him all the time,”

Iruka sighed softly, reaching down and ruffling Naruto’s hair affectionately. He couldn’t pretend that statement didn’t tug on his heartstrings a little. Naruto always was skilled at the art of guilttripping.

“I know, Naruto. But I promise, I’ll be able to spend more time with you soon, okay? And don’t even try to pretend that you haven’t been busy, you make time for me too sometime,” he teased, grinning in response to Naruto’s sheepish smile.

“Yeah, I guess,” Naruto conceded, shooting Kakashi one more suspicious glare before grabbing his shoes and backpack off the floor. “I’ll see you late, ‘Ruka!”

“Be careful going home, okay?” Iruka called down the hallway after Naruto’s rapidly retreating back, sighing softly. “That boy’s gonna turn my hair so grey…”

He turned when he heard a snort of laughter from Kakashi.

“Hey, careful what you say about grey hair,” Kakashi grinned. “Some of us like it.”

Iruka laughed, leaning into Kakashi’s side gently. “Yeah, some of us do,” he agreed.

Kakashi wrapped an arm around him, kissing the top of his head quickly. “Who’s the kid?”

Iruka leaned into Kakashi, wrapping his arms around his waist. “It’s…kind of a long story,” he warned. Kakashi rolled his eye in response.

“Have I ever been opposed to listening to you tell a long story?”

Iruka smiled, moving away from Kakashi and starting to clear away the dishes he and Naruto had created with lunch.

“Well…Naruto is…he’s basically my little brother,” Iruka began. “Not by blood. He…he never knew his parents. And mine…they died when I was ten,” he said softly, casting his eyes downward. “I, uh. I was in and out of the foster system for a long time. It was kind of hell. I emancipated myself at sixteen, got out of it. But it really stuck with me, you know? I started volunteering at an orphanage in my old town. Naruto was there, and…kids picked on him a lot. He was a weird kid, and always seemed so lonely. That’s how I felt, most of the time, too. I just saw so much me in him…” he trailed off, looking back up at Kakashi with a small, awkward laugh. “But anyway. We got close, and he…he means a lot to me. I haven’t had a lot of time to see him recently, so we spent a day together. It was nice.”

“Are you sure I didn’t interrupt?” Kakashi asked. “If you don’t see him much…”

“No, no, it’s really okay,” Iruka assured him. “He needed to go home and do his homework, anyway. I know him, I know he hasn’t touched it yet.”

Kakashi laughed a little. “Always the teacher,” he murmured, smiling fondly.

“I can’t help it,” Iruka grinned. “So, are you gonna remind me of those plans we had, or what?”

___

Just when Kakashi thought he knew Iruka well enough, so he couldn’t surprise him anymore. Honestly, he should have known better. Iruka did nothing but surprise him, and every surprise knocked Kakashi on his ass with just how many ways Iruka could get Kakashi to fall for him.

He’d had an idea that Iruka would be good around kids. He’d almost have to be, he wanted to be a middle school teacher. But that was before he arrived at Iruka’s house to find him with some 14 year old kid Kakashi could only think to describe as “neon”. No, “loud” also worked. He’d walked right up to the door, shot Kakashi a glare, and demanded to know who the hell he was.

Kakashi could barely contain his smirk. The resemblance between the two of them was astounding.

Once he’d finished glaring at Kakashi and gone, Iruka had told Kakashi how they met. And Kakashi honestly didn’t know how to respond. There had to be some kind of law against one person being this perfect. Because that’s what Iruka had to be. It didn’t make _sense_.

He pulled himself from his thoughts in time to hear Iruka ask about plans. Right, he’d come here because they had plans.

“Open-air market downtown, remember?” Kakashi smiled.

“Right. I had big plans to hold your hand in public,” Iruka teased.

Kakashi rolled his eyes, but couldn’t ignore the way his heartbeat skipped a little at the thought. He and Iruka weren’t very big on PDA in general, save for the first night on the bike. But Kakashi would be damned if he wasn’t going to take Iruka up on that offer.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Kakashi murmured, extending his hand in offering to Iruka. “Shall we?”

Iruka beamed as he accepted Kakashi’s hand, tangling their fingers together.

“Hell yeah, we shall.”

Kakashi grinned, leading Iruka out of the building and towards where he parked his bike. It had become a routine for them now, Iruka would wear Kakashi’s helmet when they went out together. It was mostly for safety reasons, of course Kakashi cared about Iruka being safe. But more than that, seeing Iruka wearing his helmet made Kakashi’s stomach do a funny flipping thing that he was pretty sure he liked. And seeing him wearing it was nothing compared to watching him take it off. He always came out of it with his ponytail just a little disheveled, and every time he’d pull the helmet off and shake the loose strands of his hair out of his face. And seeing it was as mesmerizing this time as it was every other time.

The ride downtown had been short, but it had given Kakashi enough time to think about what Iruka had told him at his apartment. He was kind of mentally kicking himself for not asking about Iruka’s family sooner, but at the same time, it was probably better to wait until Iruka was ready to tell him.

Kakashi had stayed quiet for a few minutes after the ride, walking hand-in-hand with Iruka down a side street toward the market.

“So, uh. I actually grew up in foster care, too,” Kakashi murmured, shoving his hand deep into his jacket pocket.

“Really?” Iruka’s eyes widened a little. “You did?”

“Yup,” Kakashi shrugged. “I…I never really knew my mom. I was too young when she…and my dad. I lost my dad when I was ten,” he paused, looking down at his feet. “I hated foster care. I ran away from home at fourteen. Lived on my own ever since.” It wasn’t a long story, with about half as many details as Iruka had given him. But he wanted to share, regardless.

Iruka squeezed his hand gently, leaning into him a little.

“Wow. We have more in common than anybody would probably guess,” he laughed softly.

Kakashi snorted. “Yeah, I guess we do. You turned out way better, though.”

“Shut up, I didn’t turn out _better_. Just different.” Iruka wrinkled his nose.

“Whatever you say,” Kakashi smiled fondly, running his hand through his hair quickly.

They fell into relative silence then as they approached the market, Kakashi fighting the urge to drop Iruka’s hand the moment they were in view of other people. It wasn’t that he was ashamed to be with Iruka, far from it. Honestly, being with Iruka was the first thing Kakashi felt the urge to brag about since he restored his first bike. But Kakashi had a reputation in town. People knew who he was, or at least they had suspicions about him. And Kakashi always felt guilty about pushing those suspicions and associations on Iruka. Iruka wasn’t stupid, Kakashi knew that Iruka knew how people in town generally felt about him, and Kakashi knew that Iruka could decide for himself whether or not he wanted to be associated with those feelings. He knew, and he still wanted to go out with Kakashi. Be seen holding hands with him.

The urge to shrink away was even stronger when someone behind them called Iruka’s name. He gave in to it when Iruka turned, his face breaking into a smile as a small group of people approached them. One of them was Anko, Kakashi recognized her. But the rest of them, Kakashi had never met. He assumed they must be Iruka’s friends from college. Kakashi hung back slightly, shoving his hands deep into his jacket pockets and turning his gaze aside to look at the items for sale in the stall next to him. They didn’t really interest him all that much, but it was more comfortable to pretend to look at wares than it was to awkwardly watch from the outskirts of Iruka’s conversation with his friends. It was probably better for everyone if he not join in, after all.

“Kakashi!”

Kakashi snapped out of his contemplation of a keychain of a dog when he heard Iruka call him. He looked up, blinking quickly at Iruka, who was standing with his friends a few feet away and beckoning him closer with a smile. Kakashi set the keychain down carefully, slowly making his way over to stand slightly behind Iruka at his side.

“Yeah?”

Kakashi’s eye widened as Iruka smiled, taking Kakashi’s arm and pulling him closer.

“I wanted you to meet my friends. Guys, this is Kakashi. Kakashi, this is Kotetsu, Izumo, and Genma. Kotetsu TAs with me, Genma and Izumo are classmates. And you know Anko, of course.”

Kakashi could only watch with wide eyes as Iruka gestured to each of his friends in turn, hoping desperately that he could remember these people’s names enough not to make a fool of himself. His eye darted from one face to the next, feeling uncomfortably warm under the collar when he realized that no one’s eyes were moving away from him. The guy with the excessively long toothpick in his mouth was smirking, and the first one Iruka pointed out (Kotetsu? Maybe Kakashi could just never refer to any of them by name) was eyeing him with no small amount of caution.

“Um. Hi,” Kakashi lifted a hand in a small wave, his shoulders slumping a little in an effort to be less visible. Kakashi was starting to wish he’d left his bandana on. He was feeling awfully exposed like this.

Iruka and his friends chatted for a couple minutes, Kakashi doing his best to contribute with small nods and noncommittal hums every so often. He didn’t really know much about their conversation, a lot of it having to do with schoolwork and other students and their coworkers. He focused back into the conversation when Iruka squeezed his elbow gently, and he managed to catch him saying something about how he was on a date, and he’d talk to them all later.

It wasn’t until they said their goodbyes and turned away from the group that the words caught up with Kakashi.

“You told your friends that we were on a date.” He said, sounding somewhat awestruck.

Iruka just laughed, grabbing Kakashi’s hand in his own and tangling their fingers together. “Well, we are, aren’t we?”

“I mean, yeah, we are. But,” Kakashi shook his head a little, shrugging. “I dunno. I’m not used to people being…I dunno. Okay with associating with me like that,”

At that, Iruka frowned a little. He stopped in the middle of the street, turning to face Kakashi.

“Kakashi. Did you expect me to be ashamed of you?”

Kakashi laughed a little, in spite of the blush he felt creeping up his face. “I mean. Honestly? Kind of. You know what people around here think of me, Iruka. It’s not the kinda stuff you wanna bring home to your parents,”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “Well, I don’t have any parents. And even if I did, I wouldn’t give a damn if their heads were filled with bullshit rumors about you. Believe it or not, I don’t pick people to date based off of how much the rest of the town likes them.”

“I think that’s fairly obvious,” Kakashi murmured, shifting uncomfortably. They were still very much in the middle of the road, people were definitely looking at them.

Iruka grinned, leaning forward and planting a kiss onto Kakashi’s cheek. Kakashi’s face burned red and he stumbled backwards slightly, spluttering out a high-pitched squawking noise in shock.

“I’m not afraid to be seen with you, Kakashi. I’m gonna go out with you, I’m gonna hold your hand, and I’m gonna engage in gross adorable pda with you.”

Kakashi laughed, his hand not currently occupied by Iruka’s coming up to rub at the back of his neck as they continued walking.

“You are…a force of nature, Iruka. You know that?”

Iruka grinned, swinging their linked hands between them, his reply coming out sing-song. “That’s why you love meee,”

Kakashi felt his heart stutter, Iruka’s words hitting him like a brick to the face. And he knew what that felt like. Iruka was joking, and Kakashi knew that. But the thing was, he wasn’t wrong. There were a lot of things about Iruka that drew Kakashi to him. But the first thing, the thing that made Iruka irresistible before Kakashi even knew his name…

“Yeah,” Kakashi said softly, squeezing Iruka’s hand with a fond smile. “Yeah, it is.”

___

Iruka’s breath caught in his throat, and he froze in place as soon as Kakashi’s words had time to turn over in his brain.

He loves him. Kakashi _loves_ him. Well, he didn’t say it. He didn’t say those words _exactly_. But Iruka joked about it and Kakashi’s answer _implied_ it and holy shit Kakashi loves him. Kakashi loves _him_.

He was dimly aware of the fact that he was standing in the middle of the street, blocking the flow of pedestrian traffic. He’d stopped so suddenly that he was pretty sure Kakashi’s shoulder had ran into him. But it didn’t matter. None of that mattered. Every passing thought he’d ever had about falling in love with Kakashi had come back in full force. And this time, they didn’t seem so crushing. Sure, Iruka’s heart was beating so fast it felt like it was going to burst. Sure, he might be gripping Kakashi’s hand a little harder than necessary. Sure, he’d probably been silent way too long in response to Kakashi’s fucking _love confession_.

But he’d said it. He’d said it so easily, so gently, like nothing could have made more sense in that moment.

“Iruka.”

Iruka snapped back to the present moment to the sound of Kakashi’s voice, low in his ear, and a warm weight on his shoulders and back. He looked up at Kakashi, who’s smile was subtle, and small, but so affectionate that Iruka felt he might melt into the street on the spot.

“Yeah?” he asked, feeling heat rise to his cheeks.

“You’re standing in the middle of the street.” Kakashi murmured with a small laugh, gently tugging at Iruka’s hands until they had moved away from the street and onto a bench a few feet away from the market.

It was then that Iruka acknowledged the sudden warmth around his shoulders. He looked down at his arms, blinking quickly in confusion when he saw the worn leather of Kakashi’s jacket draped over him.

“You gave me your jacket,” he said simply, looking back up at Kakashi.

“Oh. Uh. Yeah, you stopped in the street all of a sudden, and you—the sun went down a little while ago and you were shivering, so I thought I could…I wasn’t cold, so…”

Iruka felt a grin spread across his face as Kakashi stammered an explanation, laughter bubbling up from his throat.

“Oh my god, Kakashi,” Iruka grinned, raising an eyebrow. “You are such a _cliché!_ ”

“I’m a what?” Kakashi balked. “What do you mean?”

“You, the tough-but-sensitive biker, giving your clean-cut student boyfriend your leather jacket on a date? You’re every rom-com cliché come to life right now, Kakashi.”

“I…what are you talking about? You were cold and I wasn’t, it doesn’t _mean_ anything,” Kakashi spluttered, flushing darker.

“It totally does,” Iruka laughed, nudging Kakashi teasingly. “You’re such a stereotypical bad boy.”

Kakashi huffed, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’m a cliché bad boy. It’s why you love me,”

Iruka’s eyes widened, heat creeping up his neck at his own words turned back at him playfully.

“I—yeah,” Iruka shrugged a shoulder in an attempt to appear nonchalant, the pink glow of his cheeks giving him away entirely.

“Yeah, it is,”

Kakashi grinned, leaning into Iruka gently, speaking after a comfortable pause.

“So…you’re my boyfriend?”

Iruka squeaked softly, pulling Kakashi’s jacket around himself tighter.

“I’d like to think so, yeah,” he murmured, looking up at Kakashi defiantly despite how much he was blushing. Kakashi smiled softly and reached over, taking Iruka’s hand in his own.

“I’d like to think so, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So updates have been a little slow recently with work and school, but I'm working on this as much as I can. I'm glad y'all continue to enjoy this story, I love reading everything you all have to say about it. <3


	9. Chapter 9

As it turned out, being Iruka’s “official” boyfriend was both exactly like what Kakashi expected, and wildly different at the same time. By all accounts, not much about the nature of their relationship changed. They still saw each other fairly regularly. They still talked, and laughed, and bickered, and had some pretty fantastic sex. That much remained the same, and yet…Kakashi felt so different.

Everything felt a little more relaxed, somehow. Kakashi felt more comfortable texting Iruka first, or asking him to make plans. He no longer felt the lingering urge to leave Iruka’s bed in the middle of the night, and now cuddled Iruka close to him completely shamelessly as they slept. It was all kids of new territory for Kakashi, but he wasn’t as afraid as he thought he would be. To put it simply, Iruka was easy to fall in love with.

Despite this, however, neither of them had mentioned the word “love” since their moment at the market. It wasn’t that Kakashi hadn’t meant it then ,or anything. But honestly, he wasn’t sure he knew how to be in love. He was pretty sure it never happened to him before. And yeah, Iruka had said it back. But he also hadn’t ever brought it up again, maybe it was a fluke. Maybe he thought he had to because Kakashi did first. The last thing Kakashi wanted was to make Iruka feel pressured into this.

Kakashi sighed heavily, draping an arm over his eyes. Feelings were so fucking confusing. He wasn’t used to having to think about them so _much_.

“What is it now, drama queen?”

Tenzo spoke up from the end seat of the couch Kakashi was currently sprawled on, causing Kakashi to lift his arm a fraction and open his eye.

“Come on, spill. You’ve been moping around for hours. What gives?”

Kakashi shrugged as best he could while still lying down, letting his arm cover his eyes again.

“I’ve…had a lot of things to think about recently.”

“Iruka things?”

Kakashi wrinkled his nose, letting out a small groan. Tenzo was, undoubtedly, smirking that insufferable smirk he always did when he knew he was right. It had happened a lot since Iruka came around.

“C’mon, Kakashi. Talk to me.”

Kakashi sighed again, finally letting his arm drop off the couch and looking up at Tenzo.

“Yeah, Tenzo, Iruka things.” Kakashi muttered. “I don’t…I don’t understand…this.”

Tenzo raised his eyebrow as Kakashi gestured vaguely around his head before letting his hand drop again.

“Yeah, it’s hard for me to understand, too, when you explain it like that.”

Kakashi glared, flipping Tenzo the bird before trying again.

“I dunno how to explain it, Tenzo. I just. I feel a lot, recently.”  He paused. “He called us boyfriends a few weeks ago.”

“Oh, yeah?” Tenzo smiled, reaching over and ruffling Kakashi’s hair. “Cute. You guys are getting serious, huh?”

“Yeah, that’s the thing. I don’t know,” Kakashi mumbled, glaring up at the ceiling. “I don’t exactly know what “getting serious” means. I don’t know what I’m doing, here.”

Tenzo laughed softly, shaking his head gently. “It means whatever you guys want it to, Kakashi. That’s kind of what relationships are about,”

“That’s supremely unhelpful,” Kakashi grumbled. “I…I don’t even know what I want from this,” he admitted. “Like…I’ve never had anything like this before.”

“Well, are you happy?”

Kakashi frowned, his brows furrowing together. The question was simple, and Kakashi hadn’t given it much thought.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m really happy.”

Tenzo smiled again, shrugging. “Then what’s to think about?”

“I don’t know,” Kakashi sighed, rubbing his eye with the heel of his palm. “I…I don’t know how to explain how I feel about all this. How I feel about him, you know?”

“You want to try?”

“I guess,” Kakashi murmured, sitting up and sighing softly. “I…I miss him when he’s not around. And when he is around, I…I feel like I wanna be as close to him as possible. Like, not even just physically. Like, I wanna listen to him talk about whatever, and fucking…do dishes with him after dinner and let him fall asleep on my lap on the couch. Everything just gets a little more peaceful when he’s around, you know? And like...it’s where I’m supposed to be.”

Tenzo laughed softly, rolling his eyes.

“Kakashi, you’re kinda like a moron.”

“What?” Kakashi spluttered indignantly, glaring over at Tenzo. “What the hell’s that mean?”

“You. You’re kinda like a moron,” Tenzo repeated. “All that shit you just said? Please. It just sounds like you like him.”

“Yeah, that much was obvious,” Kakashi snorted.

“Then I really don’t know what the big deal is.”

“I…I know how I feel about him. Sort of. It’s…weird. I’m not used to it. But I know,” Kakashi paused, picking at a small hole in his jeans. “I don’t know if he…I don’t know if I make him happy,” he said softly.

“And, I repeat. You’re kinda like a moron.”

“Tenzo…” Kakashi growled.

“Okay, okay,” Tenzo rolled his eyes. “Kakashi, you’re worried that Iruka doesn’t feel the same about you. So, _ask_. That’s the only way for you to know. Sitting here and moping isn’t gonna answer your question.”

Kakashi wrinkled his nose, frowning. He knew that Tenzo was right. Tenzo usually was, after all. But the prospect of talking about this with Iruka was honestly terrifying. Talking about emotions sounded like something that should only be done once one _understood_ their emotions, and Kakashi was nowhere near that level yet. What he had with Iruka, as calm and safe as it made Kakashi feel, also still kind of felt like it was fragile and new enough that any disturbance might shake it too much for them to bear.

“I don’t know how to bring that kind of thing up.”

Tenzo shrugged, looking over at Kakashi sympathetically.

“I don’t really know either, bud. You’re on your own here, I think.”

Kakashi groaned, slumping down low on the couch.

“Yeah, I kinda figured,”

Tenzo grinned. “You could ask Gai. I’m sure if you get him drunk, there’s a rousing speech about the springtime of your youthful affection just waiting to get out,”

“Fuck, no,” Kakashi laughed. “I don’t think I need any poetry about the flowering of my love again. Once was enough.”

“God forbid Iruka ever hears any of it.”

“I’d deserve the breakup,” Kakashi nodded solemnly.

Tenzo laughed, rolling his eyes.

“The point is, Kakashi…I think you’re overthinking it.” He said simply. “You’re happy, Iruka hasn’t brought up anything to make you think he’s unhappy. I wouldn’t stress about it too much, y’know?”

“I guess,” Kakashi conceded, sighing softly. “Thanks…for talking it out with me, Tenzo.”

“Anytime.”

___

Despite the conversation he had with Tenzo, Kakashi still hadn’t mustered up the courage to ask Iruka how he felt. And while he felt better about their relationship, the fact that he was still too afraid to bring it up was weighing on him even more now. Now it felt like he was running away from something, and that just made him feel like he was being stupid.

He hadn’t seen Iruka in a couple of days, anyway. He’d cancelled one of their usual dinners because he’d been swamped with tests and projects, promising Kakashi that he’d make it up to him once he got through the week. Kakashi really didn’t mind, he hadn’t been through any kind of higher education, he had no idea how hard it could be. Judging by the amount of thick books and folders of paper he’d glimpsed in Iruka’s apartment, it definitely looked like it was a lot harder than anything Kakashi thought he could handle. He was more than willing to give Iruka space when he felt busy. Kakashi certainly didn’t think he could be of any help.

But still, it was kind of strange not seeing him. Iruka had become such a part of his weekly routine, and not having him around for almost an entire week was starting to feel weird. He’d ended up picking up a few more shifts at the pawn shop just to kill time, which is where he found himself one evening in an unexpected position.

He’d just finished closing up the shop, and had bummed one of the cigarettes that Asuma keeps behind the counter when he heard muffled voices from the alleyway beside the shop. A cursory glance didn’t reveal much, but then again, Kakashi really didn’t expect it to. It was dark, and the alleyways were twisted and easy to hide in, if you knew what you were doing.

Luckily, Kakashi did. He’d done enough hiding in alleyways to be pretty adept at finding people now. And, while he usually wasn’t one to go sniffing out obvious trouble, something about these particular muffled voices was calling to him. They sounded oddly familiar, but he couldn’t place them.

He ground his cigarette into the pavement under his heel, before heading toward the sound of voices. As he got closer, he managed to pick out the odd word or phrase. Things like _“past your bedtime”_ or _“kid’s gonna call his mommy on us,”_ making their way into Kakashi’s ears. So some assholes were picking on kids, again?

Kakashi knew he shouldn’t get involved. He could easily turn around, get on his bike, and go home for the night.

But they were picking on _kids_. And that hit close to home.

Kakashi rounded the corner, and was met with the backs of two seedy-looking men. They were hunched over a smaller figure, jeering and prodding at them. The kid didn’t seem to be hurt so far, as he stood up and squared his shoulders to face the two men before him.

Kakashi’s eye went the size of a dinner plate.

“You—you’re Iruka’s—”

Kakashi blurted out the words before he could think about them. No sooner did the words come out of his mouth, then did all three figures in the alley turn to look directly at him.

What the hell was the kid from Iruka’s apartment doing in some back alleyway after midnight? From the looks of it, he wasn’t faring so well. He hadn’t appeared hurt at first, but once he stood, the light hit him in a way that Kakashi could see a cut across his cheek and blood on his shirt. He was holding his own, but not doing well.

“You know this kid, Hatake? Didn’t realize you were a babysitter now,” one of the men sneered. “Then again, you always did go for the charity cases.”

“If you know what’s good for you, you’ll get lost quick enough that I can forget your faces,” Kakashi growled. “You always did feel the most like a man when you roughed up kids, didn’t you?”

“I think you’re the resident expert on feeling men,” the other weighed in, his eyes narrowing. “They’ve been saying you’ve gone soft for some man, Hatake. That you’ve been shacking up with some local queer,”

The man spat the word at Kakashi’s feet with a snort of disdainful laughter, and Kakashi saw white with rage. His hands clenched into fists at his side, and it was taking every ounce of his self-control to stay still.

“Care to say that again?” Kakashi challenged, his voice shaking slightly with the effort to stay calm. “Go on. I want to make sure I heard them properly. They are your last words, after all.”

The two men paused, their faces falling slightly as they shared a cautious glance. Kakashi’s reputation was still on his side.

“We ain’t afraid of no fag,” one of them insisted, pulling a switchblade out of his jacket and flicking it open.

Kakashi scoffed, raising an eyebrow appraisingly.

“Prove it.”

There was a beat of stillness, and then hell broke loose. Both men lunged at Kakashi, who sidestepped one in favor of clotheslining the second with a forearm to the throat. He went down with a choked grunt, and Kakashi swore aloud when he realized the man with the knife had maneuvered very effectively into his blind spot. He spun quickly to try and defend himself, but he managed to evade him each time. Perhaps Kakashi had underestimated him.

The first man to go down seemed to have recovered at least slightly, and was shifting on the ground at Kakashi’s feet. Kakashi swore again. He needed to end this quick, before he or the kid got hurt.

The man with the knife took advantage of Kakashi’s moment of distraction to strike with his blade. It managed to catch Kakashi on the shoulder, giving Kakashi just the right amount of room to swing with his right had and catch his attacker across the face with a punch. He felt his fingers crack with the blow, but the man went down and stayed. That left only one.

Kakashi turned to the other man in time to catch an elbow to the temple. He stumbled backwards with a grunt, kicking out at the man’s knees and feeling his heel make contact. He lunged forward, taking advantage of the man’s compromised balance to tackle him to the pavement, striking him across the face with the back of his right hand. Pain shot up his arm from striking with his already injured hand, but he simply clenched his teeth and drew back for another blow.

Movement to his right caught his eye and he froze as he locked gazes with the boy from Iruka’s apartment. He was staring, wide-eyed and still, at the scene before him. He didn’t look afraid, not entirely. The fear was mixed with awe, and something Kakashi couldn’t quite recognize.

Kakashi dropped his hand, glaring down at the man below him.

“If I catch you with another fucking kid, it won’t be so fucking gentle,” Kakashi spat, standing and pushing the man aside with his foot. He barely registered the weak grunt of pain as he moved towards the kid. This would be so much easier if he remembered his name.

“You,” Kakashi growled, almost wild still from the fight. “What the hell are you doing here?”

To the kid’s credit, he did not shy away from Kakashi’s glare or words. He wiped blood off of his cheek, scowling.

“Trying to find you! It worked, didn’t it?”

Kakashi froze, his eye widening. “I—what?”

“I knew I knew you from somewhere. Everyone always talks about you! They say all kinds of crazy stuff! And then you—” he paused, wrinkling his nose. “Iruka doesn’t need someone causing him a lot of trouble! I needed to make sure you were good enough for him!”

Kakashi blinked, shocked into silence for a few seconds before he managed to collect his wits.

“No offense, kid, but that was a stupid fucking idea,” Kakashi muttered, grabbing the back of the kid’s collar. “Come on, squirt.”

“Hey!” the kid shouted, squirming and tugging at Kakashi’s wrist as he was marched through the alleys toward where Kakashi parked his bike. “Let me go! What the hell d’you think you’re doing to me?”

“Shut up,” Kakashi rolled his eyes, releasing him once they’d gotten back to his bike. He grabbed his helmet, tossing it to the kid. “Put it on. No complaints. Get on the bike and hold on tight.”

The kid caught the helmet with wide, shining eyes, looking up at Kakashi in bewilderment.

“What—”

“I’m taking your punk ass back to Iruka,” Kakashi said simply, tugging his bandana up to cover his split lip. Yeah, the kid didn’t look too great. But he definitely looked worse. He’d gotten clocked pretty hard to the left of his face, by the feel of it, it was pretty swollen. And his hand was definitely broken. That wasn’t even mentioning the hole in his jacket…and his shoulder. “It was stupid of you to come out here. It’s dangerous at night. If I hadn’t been close by, they can and would have killed you. You say Iruka doesn’t need anyone to cause him trouble, right? So stay out of it yourself.”

The kid hung his head in silence, before pulling the helmet on and clambering onto the bike. Kakashi rolled his eyes, sitting in front of him and waiting until he felt the kid hold on.

“Keep holding tight. It’s faster than you’d think,” he murmured, before kicking off and tearing through the alley toward 7th.

___

Iruka sighed heavily, scrubbing at his tired eyes with the heels of his palms before dropping his heavy arms. He’d been working on the same paper for hours, and he was reaching the point where words stopped making any reasonable kind of sense. He picked up his phone, clicking the button on the side and groaning when he read the numbers on the screen. It was well past midnight, and he wasn’t nearly as close to finished this paper as he wanted to be tonight. He needed to get at least halfway done if he wanted to finish by tomorrow, but he didn’t think he could string a coherent academic thought together to save his life. He briefly considered making himself coffee, but quickly shot that idea down. He needed to sleep tonight if he wanted to have any hope of surviving lecture tomorrow. He just…needed something to give him a quick jolt.

His hopes were answered in the form of a sudden loud knock at his door, causing him to yelp softly and flinch so hard he knocked his textbook off the coffee table. Who the hell was at his door at almost 1AM on a Thursday night? If Anko had come drunk-visiting again, he was going to kick her ass.

He pushed his hair out of his face roughly, blinking drowsiness out of his eyes and going to pull open the door. The sight that greeted him struck him dumb for several horrified seconds.

“Kakashi? You— _Naruto?_ What are—you’re hurt!” Several emotions flashed through Iruka’s brain—confusion, fear, anger—he was having a difficult time processing everything at once. Kakashi was on his doorstep, holding Naruto by the collar of his shirt. Naruto had an obvious cut across his cheek and blood on his shirt. Kakashi’s bandana was concealing the lower half of his face, but his jacket was ripped at the shoulder, and the bit of his left eye that Iruka could see through his hair was swelling and reddish-purple.

“Get inside. Explain. _Now._ ”

“I’m sorry, ‘Ruka!” Naruto whined, stumbling inside and throwing himself into Iruka’s chest as soon as Kakashi released his shirt. “I wasn’t—”

“Not you,” Iruka’s voice was firm, and he fixed his glare onto Kakashi. “Talk. You both are hurt. What. Happened?”

Kakashi sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair distractedly. This gave Iruka a full view of what was blossoming into a brilliant black eye, and Iruka’s eyes widened further.

“I had just finished closing up the shop for the night, when I heard something from the alleyways. I went to check it out, and it’s lucky I did. Some assholes were trying to rough him up. I roughed them up worse.”

Iruka felt his chest tighten, and he looked down at Naruto, who was blinking up at him with huge, shining eyes. He let out a shaky breath, hugging Naruto close and letting his eyes slip shut. He felt Naruto bury his face in his chest, muffling his voice as he spoke.

“He’s telling the truth, ‘Ruka, he…he helped me,”

“I know, Naruto,” Iruka murmured, pulling back to look Naruto in the face. He brushed his thumb over the cut on Naruto’s cheek, wincing a little. “Come with me. I’m gonna clean this…and it’s so late. You can stay with me tonight, okay? Let’s get you a bandage, and then you should go to sleep. No arguments.” He paused, glancing back at Kakashi before taking Naruto into his bathroom to get him bandaged up. Once he’d managed to get Naruto into a clean shirt and set up on his bedroom floor in a sleeping bag, he stepped back out into his sitting room. Relief flooded his system when his eyes met Kakashi’s.

“You’re still here,”

Kakashi looked up, shrugging a shoulder. “Thought you might still have questions,”

Iruka paused in front of Kakashi, reaching up and hesitating with his hand hovering in front of Kakashi’s bandana. Kakashi gave an almost undetectable nod, and Iruka pulled the bandana down gently. His eyes widened as Kakashi’s bloodied and swollen lip was revealed, and he took a small step back in shock.

“Kakashi—”

“I’m fine,” Kakashi cut him off with a low murmur, averting his gaze. “Really. I’ve been through worse. I’m just glad the kid’s okay.”

Iruka shook his head, weak, hysterical laughter bubbling up before he could stop it.

“Holy shit, Kakashi,” he whispered, bringing his hand up to Kakashi’s face gently. His thumb trailed over Kakashi’s split lip, just barely brushing the bloody skin. “C’mere. Let me help you clean these,”

Kakashi’s eye widened and he shrugged, seeming to shy away from the attention.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to—”

“I want to,” Iruka insisted. “Please, let me help you.”

Kakashi relented, letting Iruka lead him into his bathroom. He had a first aid kit open on the countertop, from which he immediately grabbed a packet of disinfecting wipes. He opened a wipe, just barely touching it to Kakashi’s lip when Kakashi hissed, jerking away.

“Hold still,” Iruka murmured sternly, his free hand coming up behind Kakashi’s head to hold him. He lifted the wipe again, frowning when Kakashi moved to pull away again. “Kakashi, let me clean the cut,”

“Fuck, no. That stings,” Kakashi huffed, glaring at the wipe in Iruka’s hand.

Iruka rolled his eyes impatiently, pulling Kakashi’s face closer and holding him firm. “It stings, but this’ll get infected if you don’t clean it. The infection will hurt worse. Now hold _still_.”

Iruka cleaned Kakashi’s lip gently, ignoring the tiny noises of discomfort slipping from Kakashi’s throat. He pushed Kakashi’s hair aside to inspect the rapidly blossoming black eye, his fingers brushing over bruised skin gently.

“You should put some ice on this,” he murmured. “It looks pretty bad.”

“No point,” Kakashi grumbled. “Eye’s gone anyway. It’s not like the bruise could impede my vision any more than that.”

“I’m sure it still hurts,” Iruka huffed. “The ice will make it hurt less. Now, take off your jacket.”

“What?”

“Don’t even try to pretend your shoulder’s not cut. There’s a slice out of your jacket. Take it off and let me clean that one too.”

Kakashi paused, the look on his face was something Iruka could only describe as a pout. It would have been comical, seeing Kakashi in his cramped bathroom pouting, if it weren’t for the fact that it was cause for so much worry. He looked, briefly, like he was considering refusing Iruka’s request. He thought better of it, slowly sliding his jacket off his shoulders. The action was strangely tense, like he was still trying to shield something from Iruka. It didn’t take long for Iruka to figure out what.

“Kakashi, your hand!”

Kakashi winced, attempting to pull his hand out of Iruka’s sight quickly, but he didn’t get that chance. Iruka grabbed his wrist, pulling it out in front of him, causing Kakashi to grunt softly in pain.

“Fuck, Iruka, It’s—”

“If you say “fine”, I’ll kick your ass myself,” Iruka warned, holding tight to Kakashi’s wrist to prevent him from pulling away. “Kakashi, your hand is clearly broken!”

“No, it isn’t,” Kakashi. Sighed heavily. “Maybe a finger or two. But it’s fine. Nothing that hasn’t happened to it before.”

“Just because it’s happened before, doesn’t mean it isn’t worrying now!”

Kakashi stilled, his eye widening a little. “Iruka—”

“No! Kakashi, you have to take care of yourself! You can’t just—you can’t just let things go on just because they happened before, things like this shouldn’t be normal, they—you can’t let it be normal…”

“Iruka,” Kakashi said again, softly. “Iruka, loosen up. You’re holding too tight,”

Iruka heard Kakashi’s voice like he was coming out of a dream. His eyes snapped up to meet Kakashi’s, and he was dimly aware of the feeling of Kakashi’s hand over his own, gently attempting to loosen his fingers from his wrist.

“Please. I’ll hold still, I promise. Let go,”

Iruka startled, his eyes widening, and dropped Kakashi’s wrist like it had burned him.

“Kakashi—I’m so—I hurt you, I’m so sorry—”

“You didn’t,” Kakashi assured him. “It’s okay, Iruka. It’s late, and you’re stressed, and you’re worried. I…let’s just finish up here, okay?”

Iruka nodded slowly, looking back down at the disinfectant he was holding in his hands. He didn’t even know what had just hit him. One moment, he was helping Kakashi bandage his injuries, the next…he remembered his chest constricting, his entire body tensing…and then Kakashi’s voice calming him down.

“Right, your shoulder,” he murmured, inspecting the cut closely. “It…doesn’t look too deep. I think your jacket…your jacket got it worse than you,”

Kakashi hummed quietly, letting Iruka work before answering. “That’s kinda what I wear it for.”

Iruka sighed softly, scrubbing at his eyes with his hands. He suddenly felt significantly more tired than before. He moved toward the countertop, starting to pack away the first aid kit slowly and robotically.

Kakashi pulled his jacket back on carefully, shifting awkwardly in the small space they shared.

“I, uh. I guess I should go. You’re busy, and I caused enough excitement for the night—”

“Please stay,” Iruka blurted out. He tried to keep his voice level, but his body was giving him away. He’d gone completely still, and his knuckles were white with how tightly he gripped the countertop. “I…I don’t want you to go.”

“Okay,” Kakashi said softly, placating. “I’ll stay, if you want me to.”

“I do,” Iruka whispered. “I…you should put some ice on your hand, at least,”

Kakashi looked like he was about to protest, but bit his tongue. He sighed softly, flexing his fingers experimentally.

“Stop, you’ll make it worse,” Iruka murmured, taking Kakashi’s wrist gently, guiding him out of the bathroom and back toward the kitchen. He opened the freezer, grabbing a bad of frozen peas and placing it over Kakashi’s bruised fingers, watching Kakashi’s face carefully for signs of pain or discomfort. They stood like that in silence for a few moments, Kakashi with his hand in Iruka’s, holding each other’s gaze.

“I…thank you,” Iruka finally broke the silence, his gaze dropping to their joined hands. “Thank you for bringing him back to me,” he shut his eyes, taking in a shaky breath to try and steady himself. “If you hadn’t of been there, I—”

“Don’t,” Kakashi murmured, bringing his free hand up to tuck a lock of hair behind Iruka’s ear. “I was there. And everyone’s safe.”

“I hate thinking about him out there,” Iruka shook his head, looking up at Kakashi. “What was he even doing? He knows it’s dangerous…”

Kakashi sighed heavily, averting his gaze. “Looking for me,” he admitted.

“What?”

“Well, it turns out I’m more famous than I thought,” Kakashi laughed bitterly. “He was looking for me. Wanted to check up on me, make sure I _wasn’t_ living up to my hype. Wanted to make sure I’m good enough for you, he said.” He shook his head. “Stupid move. But he cares a lot about you,”

Iruka groaned softly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That stupid kid,” he whispered. “Everybody’s been so worried about me. It’d be flattering if it weren’t bordering on insulting.”

Kakashi’s brows knit together, and he frowned. “What do you mean, everyone’s worried about you? Because of me?”

Iruka sighed, releasing Kakashi’s hand and folding his arms across his chest. This wasn’t a conversation he truly wanted to have with Kakashi, not tonight, not ever. He wondered, briefly, what kind of bad karma he racked up these past few months that he got slammed with exams, an injured Naruto, and Kakashi asking hard questions all at once.

“Kakashi…I don’t wanna talk about this,”

“Why not?” Kakashi asked, his voice growing louder. “Iruka, do people think—”

“Kakashi, _please_ ,” Iruka whispered, hugging himself tighter. He couldn’t bear to have this conversation tonight. He was stressed, he was exhausted, and all he wanted to do was curl up next to Kakashi’s comforting presence and forget about the events that lead up to this. “Kakashi…I promise, we can talk later. But I can’t…I can’t right now. This has been so much, and I just…I need a break, please…”

Kakashi’s face softened, and he wrapped his arms around Iruka’s shoulders, pulling him into a gentle hug. Iruka let out a shaky breath, squeezing his eyes shut and burying his face in Kakashi’s chest. He inhaled deeply, slowly relaxing as he felt Kakashi’s hands rubbing gently up and down his back. He felt Kakashi kiss the top of his head, and the gesture was so affectionate that Iruka had to take a moment to fight back a sudden swell of tears. He’d needed this, all week he’d needed this. It was almost unbelievable how quickly he’d gotten to a point where what he needed the most when shit got hard was Kakashi.

“Kakashi?”

“Mh?”

Iruka paused, biting down on his lower lip gently. “I…I love you,”

Iruka practically held his breath, waiting for Kakashi to break his silence. He’d gone completely still, though Iruka could hear his heartbeat speed up from where his head rested against Kakashi’s chest. He felt Kakashi’s silence like weight on his shoulders, getting worse the longer it dragged on. It made him grow increasingly more tense with every minute, though Kakashi himself remained relaxed.

“Are…are you gonna say anything?” Iruka asked, his arms tightening a little around Kakashi’s waist. “I kinda…meant a lot by that, and you’re just not saying _anything_ , I—”

“I love you, too,” Kakashi murmured, nuzzling into Iruka’s hair gently. “I’m sorry, I…You just surprised me, I guess? I never…I’m not used to hearing that, is all,” he pulled back, kissing Iruka’s forehead. “Don’t worry so much, Princess. “

Iruka flushed bright red, hiding his face in Kakashi’s chest, feeling the rumble as Kakashi chuckled low in his throat.

“Shut up,” he mumbled.  “Don’t call me Princess…”

“I’m sorry,” Kakashi laughed softly. “You get so flustered, it’s adorable.”

Iruka wrinkled his nose, pouting up at Kakashi, who only laughed harder in response. He stuck his tongue out, valiantly holding his pouty glare for several seconds, before dissolving into giggles himself. He leaned into Kakashi’s shoulder, smiling a small, sleepy smile.

“I missed this,” he murmured. “I missed _you_ ,”

“I missed you, too,” Kakashi said softly, hugging Iruka closer. “But you should go to sleep, it’s late. And I know you have class tomorrow.”

“Look who’s being the teacher now,” Iruka teased, but yawned in spite of himself. “I guess I should sleep…are you gonna stay?”

“Is that a good idea?” Kakashi asked. “Naruto is here,”

Iruka pouted, sighing softly. “That’s…a fair point,” he conceded, hugging Kakashi close again. “Kakashi?”

“Yeah?”

“Next time I tell you not to come over for an entire week, don’t listen to me.”

Kakashi laughed, leaning down to kiss Iruka’s cheek.

“Noted. Go to sleep, Iruka. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

Iruka sighed softly, but nodded. He let Kakashi step away, putting the frozen peas back into Iruka’s freezer before stepping toward the door.

“G’night, Kakashi,” Iruka murmured.

Kakashi waved, smiling softly.

“G’night, Iruka.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the point in the writing process where I look at my chapter estimation and think.....I may have underestimated how much of this story I wanted to write. But we shall see.   
> We're getting into the main Drama of the story, as it were. I'm super happy that y'all have been enjoying this. <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you may have noticed that the chapter count has gone up.   
> ...I did, in fact, underestimate how much I wanted to write for this. But! That just means there's more story to read. Which is, I hope, is a good thing!

Iruka awoke the next morning to exhausted groans from his bedroom floor, louder and more persistent than the alarm clock that triggered them.

Iruka laughed softly, reaching over and switching off his alarm clock without even opening his eyes. He wanted nothing more than to ignore his classes and just go back to bed. If staying up late studying wasn’t bad enough, the events of last night had him completely emotionally drained on top of that.

He pushed himself into a sitting position with some effort, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and trying his best to tame his unruly bedhead. He only had a few hours until he kicked Naruto out to go to school, and he intended to make them count.

“Naruto, wake up,” he murmured, nudging the completely blanket-covered lump on his floor with his foot. “I’m making breakfast.”

The promise of breakfast got Naruto to peek at least one eye out from under his nest of blankets. Iruka considered that a victory for now.

“If you’re not out in ten minutes, I’ll come back. You know I’ll be meaner that time,” Iruka warned, only laughing when Naruto groaned even louder.

Iruka headed into his kitchen, putting the coffee on before even thinking about starting anything else. There was no way he was going to be able to focus in his lecture this morning, but he could at least be awake for it. He let out a long yawn, stretching his arms above his head in an attempt to wake himself up further. It didn’t really work very well. He wrinkled his nose, grabbing a frying pan from his cupboard and a carton of eggs out of his fridge. He’d just started cracking eggs into a bowl to scramble when Naruto shuffled into the kitchen, the blanket wrapped around his shoulders trailing onto the floor behind him.

“’Ruka, it’s so early,” He murmured, flopping into a chair and letting his forehead hit the table in front of him.

Iruka rolled his eyes, snorting softly at the sight before answering.

“I know it is, Naruto, but we both have school to go to.” He paused, sighing softly. He didn’t like playing disciplinarian with Naruto, he often didn’t feel like he had any right. But sometimes, Naruto really needed it. “You probably wouldn’t feel so bad if you hadn’t stayed up late stalking my boyfriend and getting in fights,”

Naruto tensed, sitting up slowly and letting out a forced, sheepish giggle. Iruka frowned slightly, turning back to his cooking in order to avoid Naruto’s patented innocent doe eyes. He couldn’t afford to be swindled out of this talk.

“Why did you go looking for Kakashi last night? Tell me the whole reason, please.”

Naruto screwed his face up, shifting in his chair uncomfortably.

“He just…You should hear what people say about him, ‘Ruka! That he hurts people and fights a lot and—”

“I am well aware of what people say about him, Naruto,” Iruka said, softly but sternly. “I thought you knew better than to judge people off of hearsay,”

“I wasn’t judging!” Naruto protested, pouting. “Well…okay, maybe I was, only a little! But people said so much stuff and I wanna make sure he’s gonna treat you right, like you deserve, especially after M—”

The spatula Iruka had been cooking the eggs with clattered against the stovetop and dropped to the floor.

“That’s enough, thank you, I understand,” Iruka muttered, bending slowly to pick up the spatula and return to his cooking.

“’Ruka?” Naruto asked, softly. “Are you okay?”

“I’m doing fine,” Iruka insisted, forcing a smile back at Naruto and serving the eggs onto two plates. He sat across from Naruto, sighing softly as he looked down at his breakfast. “I…I appreciate that you’re concerned. It means a lot that you want to protect me,” he paused, considering his words carefully. “But you have to trust that I can take care of myself sometimes, okay? My judgement’s improved, I promise. I don’t need people to check up on my boyfriends.”

Naruto hung his head for a few moments, chewing on his lower lip.

“I know you can take care of yourself,” He whispered, looking up at fixing Iruka with a very intense gaze. “But if there’s anything I can do to make it so you never hurt like that again, I’m going to do it! I don’t care if it was stupid or dangerous, or whatever you both said! This stupid cut’s nothing compared to what you had, ‘Ruka. And I’m not letting it happen again!”

Iruka laughed weakly, dropping his fork and holding his face in his hands. Naruto was struck dumb for several moments, watching Iruka carefully as he sat, face hidden, taking deep, steadying breaths. When he looked back up, it was to give Naruto a genuine, albeit tearful smile. He shook his head slowly, wiping at his eyes.

“You’re the one who’s supposed to make _me_ worry,” he murmured, reaching across the table to ruffle Naruto’s hair affectionately. “I’m supposed to protect you, not the other way around.”

“It’s high time I returned the favor, y’know?” Naruto grinned, shoveling the last few bites of egg into his mouth.

“Well, you can start by getting to school on time. And promising not to run around dark alleyways at night.”

Naruto winced, slouching in on himself.

“Yeah, yeah…I know,” he muttered. “Besides…he’s okay. I’m not worried about him.”

Iruka raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Naruto seal of approval?”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Naruto wrinkled his nose. “He…lectures like you when he’s mad,” he mumbled. “I think you rubbed off on him too much.”

Iruka laughed, clearing their dishes off the table. “He lectured you? Good, so now I only have to lecture half as much.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Naruto groaned. “Forget about that for a second. The important thing is, he lectured and then he helped me. He didn’t stay mad. He just took me home. I don’t trust him yet. But he’s…good, I guess.”

Iruka smiled softly, leaning against the countertop to look over at Naruto fondly.

“Well, I’m glad you think so.”

“’Ruka?”

“Mm?”

“Do you think he’d teach me to ride a motorcycle?”

“That’d be the day,” Iruka groaned. “Not until you’re older, young man.”

___

 

Despite all outward appearances, Iruka words from the other week were still weighing on Kakashi’s mind.

The comment had been offhand, under his breath, and to himself, and Kakashi couldn’t forget about it. The fact that Iruka didn’t want to talk about it only made it feel that much worse. And that wasn’t fair, Kakashi wanted to respect Iruka’s wishes and privacy, but it was eating at him, gnawing at his brain every time he had a spare moment to think about it.

And on top of that, Iruka felt distant.

Kakashi had tried his best to ignore it. It was probably all in his head, anyway. And he probably wouldn’t have noticed, if it weren’t for what Iruka had said.

People worried about Iruka, and it was because of Kakashi.

Honestly, he should have expected something like this would come up. With how the people in this town thought of him, it was bound to happen. And it’s not like the rumors were _entirely_ false. Kakashi was a terror as a child, and he recognized it. Sure, he’d like to think he’d gotten better with age. But he’d proved on that night with Naruto, he was still no stranger to street brawls. And, as was proved to him on that very same night, the shit from his old lifestyle was still far from forgetting him. They knew enough to know that Iruka existed, at least in concept. They might not know his name or face, but they knew he existed. Finding out the rest wouldn’t take much. And thinking about it that way, people were right to be worried about Iruka. Their worries were entirely justified, and entirely Kakashi’s fault.

Kakashi hadn’t mentioned any of this to Iruka, not even the part about the men he roughed up knowing about him. But that didn’t mean that Naruto hadn’t. he’d definitely heard the conversation, after all. Maybe Iruka was growing distant because he, too, saw the truth in the worries. Maybe he was reevaluating the pros and cons of being this involved with Kakashi. Maybe he was starting to realize the cons outweighed the pros.

Kakashi couldn’t say he’d blame Iruka for that, not really. Iruka had a real life. He had school, and friends, and a career, and a reputation. Kakashi was, at best, a dead end. At worst, he was a stain on everything Iruka already had. And no matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise, he couldn’t think of a single reason why Iruka _wouldn’t_ be entirely justified in breaking it off with him right now. It’s not like he wanted that. He was actually pretty sure that it would devastate him to lose Iruka now. It had only been like four months, and he knew he would get over it. He got over everything eventually, after all. But the thought of not having Iruka in his life anymore made him intensely sad, so much it almost physically hurt. He’d do whatever he could to keep it from happening.

But still, at the same time, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to actually fight that hard for it. It’s not like he wouldn’t fight for Iruka, far from it. Of all the things he’d fought for in his life, Iruka would be among the most important. But when it came down to it…he wanted what was best for Iruka. It was hard to imagine a situation in which he would be that.

He briefly considered asking Tenzo, or Asuma, or even Gai for advice about what to do, but ultimately decided against it. He’d felt like he’d already bothered Tenzo about Iruka enough, and he knew what they’d all say anyway: that he should talk to Iruka about it. And they were right, honestly. But Kakashi couldn’t help it if he wanted to delay the inevitable. If Iruka was going to figure out he wasn’t worth the trouble, he could let him do it on his own. It was probably selfish, but he wanted to hold onto this as long as he possibly could.

Kakashi sighed softly, sitting up slowly as not to disturb Iruka, who was sound asleep on the bed next to him. While this was far from the first time he was thinking about this, this was the first time it had kept him from his sleep. He glanced down at Iruka’s peaceful, sleeping face, just barely brushing his fingers through the hair fanned out over Iruka’s pillow. He felt his throat constrict slightly at the sight, suddenly filled with emotion. He slipped out of bed, sliding open the door to Iruka’s small, enclosed balcony area and stepping outside. He shivered slightly at the chill in the night air, staring up at the black sky as if he’d find answers there. The sky didn’t’ have the solution to his problem. It never did, after all.

He sighed heavily, letting his eyes slip shut and the muted sounds of the city in the dead of night wash over him. How many nights had he had, just like this? Just standing and listening, unable to sleep, searching for answers in the sky. It had been a while since he’d needed to look.

Kakashi gasped, tensing when he felt pressure on his hips. His gazed snapped down to see tan hands moving over his stomach, and he felt a warm kiss pressed into his shoulder.

“Iruka,” he murmured, relaxing into the warmth of his boyfriend at his back. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“S’okay,” Iruka whispered against Kakashi’s skin, dropping gentle kisses across his shoulders and back of the neck. “You didn’t. But when I woke up, you weren’t there.”

“Sorry,” Kakashi sighed again, moving to cover Iruka’s arms with his own, holding him close. “Couldn’t sleep very well, is all.”

Iruka hummed a small, sympathetic noise, leaning his head against Kakashi’s shoulder and simply holding him for several seconds.

“Come back?” he asked, softly. “Let me hold you?”

Kakashi let out a breath, his eye slipping shut and his arms tightening over Iruka’s. Whatever it was that he’d done in order to deserve having someone like Iruka, no matter how long it lasted, must have really been something right.

Kakashi loosened his hold, turning to face Iruka and wrapping his arms around his shoulders, pulling him close. He nuzzled into Iruka’s hair, breathing deep, slow, steadying breaths.

“Kakashi?” Iruka asked softly, looking up at him as best he could from where his head lay on Kakashi’s chest. “Is everything okay?”

Kakashi blinked his eye open slowly, remaining quiet for a few seconds. He wasn’t entirely sure how to answer that question. He wasn’t sure he was ever even really asked that before. And he had a lot of things on his mind, things he was still learning how to deal with. But right now, in the dead of night, when it felt like no one was awake but he and Iruka, he felt incredibly small in the best kind of way. It may have been the first time feeling small was a comfort.

“Everything’s fine,” Kakashi murmured, running his fingers through the ends of Iruka’s hair slowly. “I just…I love you,”

Iruka smiled, leaning up and pressing a soft kiss to Kakashi’s lips.

“Come back to bed,” Iruka coaxed, stepping backwards and guiding Kakashi back toward his bedroom.

Kakashi followed him easily, letting Iruka steer him back through the door and sitting on the edge of the bed in front of him. Kakashi smoothed his hands over Iruka’s hips, pulling him closer and resting his forehead against his stomach. He nuzzled into Iruka’s stomach until he heard Iruka laugh softly, and felt him run fingers through his hair.

“What’s up with you, hm?” Iruka murmured, running his fingers over Kakashi’s neck and shoulders slowly.

Kakashi shrugged, looking up at Iruka with a small smile. Iruka like this, in an oversized tshirt, his hair down and messy, smiling sleepily down at him in the soft light from the moon and the streetlamps outside, was possibly the most breathtaking sight Kakashi had ever seen.

“You’re gorgeous,” Kakashi mumbled against Iruka’s stomach.

“What?”

Kakashi laughed softly as Iruka blushed, clearly flustered. He pulled Iruka close by the hips, pulling him onto his lap before falling backwards onto the bed, Iruka on top of him. Iruka squeaked softly, catching himself with both arms on either side of Kakashi’s head.

“I said you, Iruka Umino, are gorgeous,” Kakashi repeated, reaching up and gently tucking a lock of Iruka’s hair behind his ear. “Sometimes…I can’t believe how lucky I am to have met you.”

“Kakashi,” Iruka protested, hiding his flushed face in the crook of Kakashi’s neck. “Seriously, what’s gotten into you tonight?”

“I don’t know,” Kakashi admitted, sighing softly. “But…I know I don’t put it into words a lot, stuff like this. How much I care about you, and all. You deserve to hear. You deserve to know how goddamn incredible you are, Iruka…”

Iruka lifted his head up, looking down at Kakashi with an expression Kakashi couldn’t really describe.

“Kakashi…just because you don’t say it, doesn’t mean I don’t know,” he smiled, leaning close and nudging his nose against Kakashi’s gently. It made Kakashi wrinkle his nose up, and that made Iruka giggle. “You don’t have to say the words for me to know, you know.”

“Are you sure?” Kakashi asked, his voice small.

“I’m sure,” Iruka assured him. “There aren’t any boxes you need to check off, or whatever, in order to love someone, you don’t have to tell me so every day in order for it to be real,” he paused, pressing a soft, tender kiss to the side of Kakashi’s mouth. “The way you love me is perfect the way it is, Kakashi.”

Kakashi let out a heavy breath, shutting his eye and wrapping his arms around Iruka tightly. He buried his face into Iruka’s shoulder, rolling them over onto their sides and relaxing against Iruka.

“God, I just…How did I get so fucking lucky?”

Iruka giggled, kissing the top of Kakashi’s head gently. “Probably the same way I did,” he murmured.

Kakashi opened his eye when he felt Iruka yawn, moving away from him slowly. “We should probably get back to sleep,”

Iruka made a small hum in protest, pulling Kakashi back against his chest and tugging a blanket over them. “Now we can sleep.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The question is, am I trying to delay the angst? I can't seem to stop writing fluff.   
> Let me know if you're enjoying! I love hearing your thoughts <3


	11. Chapter 11

Kakashi didn’t often visit Iruka at work. If anyone asked, he would say it was because children ate at his nerves with unbelievable ferocity. That was only part of it. Another reason was the Iruka often told him that his presence was distracting, a statement only proved this morning when Kakashi had managed to keep Iruka in bed with him for so long that by the time he did leave, he was in such a frazzled hurry that he’d forgotten his lunch. It only felt right that Kakashi would make the trip out during Iruka’s break to deliver him food, the situation was at least in part his fault. And that was how Kakashi found himself parked outside an elementary school a few minutes before the hoard of screaming children was released into the schoolyard for recess, and Iruka was released for lunch.

Kakashi looked up at the tall brick building in front of him, the sight bringing back almost-forgotten memories from his childhood. Back when he still went to school, back before his life started going downhill. That was the other reason Kakashi didn’t visit Iruka at work. He had too many associations with schools. He’d hoped he wouldn’t have to go inside, he had no desire to walk through fluorescent-lit hallways that all smelled like broken chalk, old books, and stale linoleum. He’d had enough of that smell to last him a lifetime.

Kakashi was so lost in thought as his eye scanned the building that he almost missed the view of Iruka through a first floor window on the corner of the building. He seemed to be in his element, and Kakashi felt a small smile creeping onto his face the longer he watched.

The bell rang, the sound loud and grating even from outside the building. Kakashi felt himself startle at the intrusive noise, shaking his head a little before grabbing Iruka’s lunch and walking towards the corner window. He waited until the excited sounds of gleeful children receded from the room, watching as Iruka shook his head slowly, gathering a stack of papers and sitting behind a desk. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Kakashi rapped his knuckles against the window, shooting Kakashi a glare before walking over and sliding the panel of glass aside.

“You can come inside, you know,” he teased, cocking an eyebrow and seating himself on the windowsill. “Instead of sneaking around like some kind of delinquent.”

“I _am_ some kind of delinquent,” Kakashi reminded him, pulling his bandana down around his neck to reveal his face, leaning inside the window to kiss Iruka’s cheek quickly. “Besides, the last thing I want to risk is running into any kids.”

Iruka rolled his eyes, accepting the bag of lunch Kakashi offered him with a soft huff of impatient laughter. “With the way you talk about my students, you’d think they’re rabid,”

“They might be,” Kakashi said in mock-seriousness. “But also, I don’t want to stay too long. I know how you find me _distracting_ ,” he teased, shooting Iruka a grin.

Iruka flushed pink, whacking Kakashi on the shoulder gently. “Shut up,”

“Make me,” Kakashi murmured, leaning closer so their noses bumped together gently.

“Iruka, do you—oh!”

Iruka flinched away from Kakashi like he’d been burned, loosing his balance and stumbling off the windowsill to face who Kakashi could only assume was a teacher. He was certainly dressed like a teacher, older than Iruka and Kakashi, with a thick notebook in his arms.

“Who’s this?” the Mystery Teacher asked. He hadn’t moved from the classroom doorway, shocked into stillness.

“I-I’m so sorry,” Iruka stammered, his cheeks flushing red. “I forgot my lunch, and I asked—he was just bringing me lunch,”

Kakashi recognized that this was probably his cue to go. The Mystery Teacher just shook his head, laughing softly.

“It’s alright, Iruka. Don’t look so nervous. You are allowed visitors during breaks, you know that.” He paused, taking a sip of his coffee before shooting Iruka a knowing smile. “Just remember, the walls have eyes in these classrooms. Very young eyes,”

“Yes, I know,” Iruka mumbled. The Mystery Teacher set his large notebook down on the desk and excused himself, leaving Kakashi alone again with a very flustered Iruka.

“Was that your boss?” Kakashi asked. “Seems like a nice guy,”

Iruka groaned softly, dragging a hand down his face slowly. “That was so embarrassing. I never wanted to be one of those interns that got caught with a boyfriend,”

Kakashi laughed, rolling his eyes. “It’s not that bad, Iruka. It’s not like we were fucking or something,”

“Kakashi!” Iruka scolded, swatting him again. “Watch your mouth,”

Kakashi only laughed harder, taking the hand Iruka used to swat him in his own and pulling him closer to the window. “Don’t think I’ve ever seen you in full teacher mode before. It’s cute,”

Iruka wrinkled his nose, smiling all the same. He allowed Kakashi to kiss his cheek again, before pulling back slowly.

“I should go…I have some grading to do during lunch,”

Kakashi nodded, pulling his bandanna back up over his face. “Alright. I’ll see you later.”

“Tonight?”

Kakashi smiled, nodding. “Tonight.”

Iruka beamed at him before he slid the window shut, blowing Kakashi a kiss before returning to his desk. Kakashi felt oddly giddy, it was a simple gesture but it made Kakashi feel warm. He turned away from the window, walking back through the schoolyard toward his bike. Unfortunately, the kids were still outside and running around, but Kakashi could manage to ignore them. The more time he spent with Iruka meant more time spent with Naruto, and none of these kids could ever manage to be that loud.

He’d almost made it back to his bike when he heard a grunt of pain from behind him, followed by laughter and the unmistakable sound of a child trying to stifle tears. Kakashi sighed heavily, his common sense was telling him to leave but he just couldn’t. He turned around, catching the sight of two boys standing over a small girl. The boys were jeering, tugging at the girl’s clothes and hair. Kakashi growled softly, putting his bike helmet down and approaching the group.

“Hey,”

All three kids froze, the two boys looking up at Kakashi with a mix of fear and shame. One recovered quicker than the other, glaring up at Kakashi with as much might as he could muster. Kakashi snorted, folding his arms over his chest.

“You think you’d be nearly as tough if you caused trouble with people who could fight back?” Kakashi asked, watching the boys shrink under his stare. “Because I don’t think you would be. People who need to hurt people smaller than them aren’t tough. And if you keep being a bully, someday someone might show you just how tough you _aren’t_.”

The boys’ eyes widened and they stammered vague excuses for several seconds, before running around to the back of the building. Kakashi snorted, turning around to head back to his bike. This is why he didn’t like kids. They were mean, and loud, and covered in germs. He was about to leave yet again, when he felt a small tug on the back of his jacket. He glanced behind him, his eye widening when he saw the little girl from earlier. She wasn’t crying anymore, but she still looked nervous. The two stared at each other for a few seconds, before Kakashi broke the silence.

“Uh…do you need something?” Kakashi asked, at a loss for what to do.

The little girl smiled a semi-toothless grin up at him, before hugging him tightly around the knees with such force Kakashi almost fell.

“Bye!” She called after she released him, turning and running back toward the school. Kakashi was absolutely flabbergasted, shaking his head quickly as he watched her return to school. That’s another thing about kids. They were unpredictable.

He shoved his helmet onto his head, determined that he would not be distracted any more. He’d leave the dealing with children to Iruka. He clearly wasn’t cut out for it.

___

Iruka stood by his kitchen table, staring down at his phone. He hadn’t been able to sit still since he’d gotten the phone call, the millions of thoughts racing through his head having no outlet besides restless energy. Kakashi was supposed to come over soon, and it’s a good thing. Iruka would probably have called him if he wasn’t already planning to be here. He’d just had a very long and unpleasant phone call, and he needed answers.

He startled out of his thoughts when he heard a sharp knock on his door. That’d be Kakashi. He sighed heavily, pushing his loose hair out of his eyes and going to open the door. Kakashi smiled, but his face fell slightly when he caught Iruka’s eyes.

“Iruka? Is something wrong?” Kakashi asked.

“Just…come inside, please,” Iruka said softly, stepping aside to let Kakashi pass. He shut the door behind him, leaning against it for a few seconds, trying to collect his thoughts.

“Kakashi, I just…I just got off the phone with the principal of the elementary school. My boss.”

“Okay?” Kakashi asked, clearly confused. “Is something wrong at work?”

Iruka fixed his eyes on Kakashi’s, holding his gaze. He needed to do this. He needed to know that nothing was wrong.

“Kakashi. When you came to my work yesterday, did you threaten a child?”

Kakashi’s visible eye widened, and he was struck dumb for several long seconds.

_“What?”_

“A child, Kakashi, did you threaten one of the students?” Iruka’s voice got louder, more demanding. The memory of his boss’ voice rang in his ears, accusations and threats blending together with his own frantic explanations. He needed to hear this from Kakashi. “We received a call from a mother this morning. Said that yesterday during recess, her son described a ‘scary man with one eye’ who said ‘mean things’ to him. So I ask again. Did you _threaten_ one of my students?”

Kakashi sighed heavily, his hand coming up to rub at the back of his neck. “Shit, Iruka,” he shook his head. “I didn’t—I didn’t _threaten_ him. I swear I didn’t,”

“But you talked to one? Tell me what happened. _Every word_ , Kakashi.”

“These two boys were picking on a little girl,” Kakashi explained, his eye cast down at his feet. “I…I told them if they didn’t stop picking on people smaller than them, someday someone might show them how tough they weren’t. I didn’t touch them, or threaten them, Iruka I _swear_ ,” he paused, meeting Iruka’s hard stare. “Please believe me, I wouldn’t do that,”

Iruka sighed heavily, his eyes slipping shut and his face falling forward into his hand. Of course, leave it to spoiled little boys and their overzealous PTA moms to turn this situation into something it isn’t. He didn’t believe Kakashi would threaten a kid, not really, but everyone else _did._ It didn’t take long after receiving the call for the principal to start asking around about who could have been on the premises that day, and it took even less time for the teacher Iruka worked with to mention who Iruka’s lunchtime visitor was. Of course he recognized Kakashi. Even if he didn’t, Kotetsu filled that blank in quickly enough. Which meant that the situation quickly became Iruka’s problem.

“I believe you, Kakashi,” Iruka said softly. “I do. But you—you can’t _do_ things like that, I know you didn’t mean anything like that but—” he cut himself off, shaking his head. “You have to be more careful. I had to make so many excuses to my boss, promise it wouldn’t happen again and that you wouldn’t be around anymore…”

The silence that hung in the air was palpable. It didn’t even seem like Kakashi was breathing.

“I…I’m so sorry, Iruka,” Kakashi croaked out, unable to meet Iruka’s eyes. “I didn’t…I didn’t want to cause you any trouble. You’re right, I’m not careful enough. I’m too reckless and this time it didn’t just bite me on the ass, but you too,”

 “You’re right. It is biting me on the ass,” Iruka said flatly. That may have been harsh, but it was how he felt in the moment. He was pent up from an hour-long phone call that was frustrating and stressful, and he so badly wanted Kakashi to be able to come over and tell him that everything they said was wrong. The crushing disappointment he felt, both in Kakashi and in himself, when that wasn’t the case was indescribable.

“Iruka…”

“Please, don’t.” Iruka said firmly, pinching the scar on the bridge of his nose. “Please…”

Kakashi stayed silent, waiting until Iruka spoke again.

“I…I don’t want to talk about it anyone. I can’t. I can’t talk anymore.”

Kakashi’s breath caught, and he looked up at Iruka. For the first time in a long time, Iruka couldn’t read his expression. He felt his chest tighten slightly at the sight, and he dropped his gaze to the floor. He and Kakashi had yet to fight until now, and it hurt more than he thought it might. Arguments were normal. Fighting with a boyfriend should be expected, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t _scary_. Of course, Iruka knew it was unrealistic to expect that he and Kakashi would never hit any kind of conflict. But he didn’t expect it to be something like this. Something where he had defended Kakashi’s name, only for Kakashi to confirm, at least partially, that the accusations had some truth. Something that other people in Iruka’s life could use as ammunition for their poor opinions of Kakashi. Something that could worm its way into Iruka’s thoughts and be used to fuel paranoias he’d been trying desperately to squash.

“Iruka?”

Iruka’s eyes snapped up to meet Kakashi’s. Kakashi’s voice was quiet, and uncharacteristically small. Iruka bit down on his lower lip, sighing heavily.

“Yes?”

“I truly am sorry,” Kakashi murmured, taking a small step closer. “I know you don’t wanna talk about it. And you probably don’t—you probably want some time without me after this. But I…” Kakashi trailed off, shoving his hands deep into his jacket pockets, clearly uncomfortable. “I’ll…I’ll go home, tonight. And I’ll…talk to you later.”

Iruka snorted softly, folding his arms across his chest, hugging himself tightly. “I think that’s probably a good idea,”

Kakashi nodded, taking a second’s pause before leaning in and kissing Iruka’s forehead gently. Iruka let his eyes slip shut when Kakashi’s lips pressed against his temple, his hands tightening on his own arms. He kept his eyes shut until he felt Kakashi move, until he heard the door shut behind him. Iruka slid down his wall, curling up on the floor. This wasn’t a big deal, at least, it didn’t have to be. Things with PTA moms blew over in their own time, and everyone at the school knew Iruka well enough that they trusted his judgement. But Iruka didn’t exactly have a history of good judgement with boyfriends, and a lot of his coworkers knew it. Clearly, many of them believed that Iruka’s shit judgement had yet to change. Iruka had been doing his best to convince everyone, including himself, that he had nothing to worry about and that Kakashi would be nothing like Mizuki. But every time anything even slightly wrong happened, no matter how small, Iruka’s anxious thoughts would latch onto the memory and blow it out of proportion. No. Iruka wasn’t letting that happen this time.

His brain wanted to focus on the argument? Fine. Iruka would focus on how, even after Iruka accused him of something horrible and demanded an answer, Kakashi sincerely apologized. His brain wanted to focus on how Kakashi left him alone, walked out on a bad note? Iruka focused on the goodbye kiss, a promise to see him later, and the fact that Kakashi leaving was in respect for his boundaries at the time. There was nothing about today, or yesterday, for that matter, that should raise any red flags or cause Iruka any alarm. And if anyone tried to argue, Iruka would still know.

Iruka sighed, pulling out his cell phone and sending Kakashi a text.

**I’m sorry for losing my temper at you. I love you.**

He didn’t have to wait very long before his phone vibrated with Kakashi’s answer.

**_It’s okay, I can take it. I love you too_ **

**Make this up to you tomorrow?**

**_Nothing to make up for_ **

**Can we have make up sex anyway?**

**_You make a compelling argument. I’ll see you tomorrow_ **

Iruka smiled, laughing to himself softly as he looked up at his ceiling. Even the most anxious parts of his mind were soothed by the ease of resolving tensions with Kakashi. He sighed, sweeping his hair out of his face and resolving to put the issue behind him. He had too much homework to get through, and at least a faint hope to actually get some sleep tonight.

He’d see Kakashi tomorrow, and everything would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y'all have been having as much fun reading this as I've been writing it. Seeing all the responses makes me so happy, thank you <3


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a lot, it covers a lot, and gets pretty intense. Definitely the most intense chapter so far.

“Yo, Kakashi! You alive in there?”

Kakashi pulled himself out of what, to an outsider, would appear to be intense contemplation of the wall of the local dive bar. He was out with Tenzo and Gai, but had spaced out in the middle of what turned into a semi-heated debate about…something. He couldn’t really remember. He wasn’t truly paying attention from the beginning, he supposed.

“Mmh?”

Tenzo rolled his eyes, slumping back in the seats of the corner booth the group currently occupied.

“We’ve been calling your name for a while now, man. You good? You’re not usually a spacey drunk,”

Kakashi snorted, picking up his beer and taking another swig. “I’m not even drunk, Tenzo. I’m half a beer in,”

“Even more concerning,” Tenzo raised an eyebrow. “Let me guess, loverboy. Iruka on your mind?”

“Shut up,” Kakashi muttered. “It’s nothing,”

“Kakashi!” Gai exclaimed, nearly knocking over what must have been at least his fourth bottle with his exuberance. “You must not feel the need to conceal your more delicate emotions! Tenzo and myself are your dearest friends, if there is something that is troubling you, we wish to help!”

Kakashi groaned softly, sliding down lower in the booth. He could practically feel Tenzo and Gai’s eyes on him, and it made his ears and cheeks burn. He’d managed, for a pretty good while, to keep his insecurities about Iruka away from his time with his friends. But it had been eating at him particularly badly tonight, and the drinking hadn’t helped.

“For real, Kakashi,” Tenzo’s voice was softer, and he nudged Kakashi’s shoulder gently with his own. “If something’s up, you can tell us.”

“Don’t wanna bring the mood down,” Kakashi muttered, fixing his eyes back on the chipped paint of the bar wall.

“Do not be ridiculous, Kakashi!” Gai thumped his hand on the table loud enough to startle the young woman passing by. “Anything that I can do to assist a dear friend is nothing to be upset by!”

Kakashi felt his face burn hotter when Gai’s boisterous voice attracted glances from the other bar patrons, and he pulled his bandana back up over his face.

“Okay, fine, I’ll tell you. Just…keep it down, okay?”

Tenzo laughed softly, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. We’ll keep your reputation,”

Kakashi winced, downing the rest of his beer and casting his eyes downward again. “Yeah…that’s kinda where the problems start.”

“What do you mean?” Tenzo’s brows furrowed slightly. “Iruka suddenly cares that people talk about you?”

Kakashi sighed, picking at the label on his beer bottle. “He says he doesn’t…he says he finds it more funny than anything else…but I don’t know if that’s entirely true anymore.”

“Kakashi, what happened?” Tenzo was frowning.

“Long story. But I visited him at work a few weeks ago, brought him lunch…some kids were picking on some girl, I stopped them, they ran home and told their mom that a ‘scary man’ was mean to them, and now Iruka’s in trouble at work,” he paused, letting his hands drop back to his sides after putting air quotes around “scary man”. “He says it’s not causing him trouble at work, but his boss called to yell at him after it happened. And he keeps…he keeps coming back from work looking stressed, and not wanting to talk about it. He doesn’t want me to worry about it, but I feel like it’s my fault,”

“Damn. Yikes,” Tenzo winced, shooting Kakashi a sympathetic glance.

“Yeah, that sums it up,” Kakashi muttered, rolling his eye. “I just…I know he says it doesn’t bother him, and I know I should let it go, but…”

“But what?” Tenzo asked, clearly concerned.

“I just…well this fuckin’ proves it, doesn’t it?” Kakashi let his head fall back against the back of the seat. “I’m not good enough for him. I never was. It was only a matter of time until he realized that all I could do was make his life worse,”

“Kakashi—”

“Nevermind. Just drop it, Tenzo,” Kakashi growled, leaning forward and resting his head in his hands.

“Kakashi.”

Gai’s voice was so soft, it startled Kakashi into looking up.

“It pains me to see you so down on yourself, Kakashi,” Gai murmured, smiling somewhat sadly. “You are a good man, and Iruka sees that. He loves and treasures you deeply, which is only dwarfed by how you do the same for him. I do not remember the last time I have seen you looking this happy, Kakashi. And though I have only met with the two of you on rare occasions…the look in your Iruka’s eyes when he smiles at you could warm the hearts of a thousand,”

Kakashi couldn’t remember the last time his face felt this hot. He could barely handle Gai’s poetic ramblings when he was out of his mind and slurring, when he was serious it was oddly worse. He was struck speechless.

Tenzo laughed softly, nudging Kakashi again. “Yeah, what he said.”

Kakashi shook his head a little, finally regaining some of his composure. “Goddammit, Gai, you gotta stop waxing poetic in public,” he muttered, clearly embarrassed. “Thanks, though. For real.”

Tenzo laughed again as Gai flashed Kakashi a blinding grin.

“I might not be as good with my prose as our beloved Gai, but…c’mon, Kakashi. We all know you were a little hellion when you were young. We all were. But you’re not anymore, you’re a good guy. Anyone who’s spent more than a fleeting minute with you can tell.” Tenzo paused, shrugging. “I think you’re worrying more than you oughta be. Iruka’s so fucking into you, PTA moms be damned.”

Kakashi allowed himself a small smile. “Let me guess, this is when you tell me I should talk to Iruka about it if I’m that worried?”

Tenzo grinned, raising his bottle in cheers. “Damn, either I got predictable or I finally got some advice through your thick skull,”

“Yeah, yeah,” Kakashi murmured, but there was no malice in his voice. “I fuckin’ whined enough for tonight, anyway. I’m so fuckin’ behind on drinks,”

“That you are!” Gai agreed, pushing another beer towards Kakashi. “Outdrinking you has not been a challenge tonight!”

“That does it. I’m drinking you under the fucking table.”

“I would like to see you try!”

Tenzo groaned softly, shaking his head. “Leaving Tenzo to drive your drunk asses home. Fucking typical.”

___

Iruka paused, freezing mid-step in mild confusion. He backed up a few paces, peering down a side alleyway curiously. Hunched in the alley, his back towards Iruka, was none other than Kakashi. He’d recognize that old leather and silver hair anywhere. Several thoughts passed through Iruka’s head quickly, none of them making much sense. Was he hurt? Hiding something? Iruka frowned slightly, walking closer until he was only a few feet behind him.

“Kakashi?”

Iruka had to stifle a laugh as Kakashi jumped, squawking slightly in surprise as he turned around.

“Iruka? What are you doing here?”

Iruka grinned, holding out a plastic bag of groceries in explanation. “My afternoon class got cancelled, I thought I’d run some errands. What are you doing squatting in an alley?”

Iruka dropped his bags against the wall, waling closer when Kakashi beckoned him towards him. He let out a small, delighted gasp when he drew close, seeing none other than three dogs sprawled out in front of Kakashi to receive tummy rubs. They were all scruffy looking, definitely strays, but Kakashi was petting them like they were his own. Iruka sat next to Kakashi, extending his hand to allow a sleepy-looking brown pug to sniff his fingers.

“I was just visiting my dogs,” Kakashi answered, smiling softly as Iruka giggled at the pug licking his fingers.

“They’re yours?” Iruka asked, his eyes widening. “Kakashi, if you’ve been hiding me from these all this time…”

Kakashi laughed, shaking his head gently. “Nah, not really. They’re strays…but I met them a couple years ago, I was real young when I met this guy,” he smiled, indicating the pug that was steadily making its way into Iruka’s lap. “Started petting him, feeding him when I could. I call him Pakkun,”

“Hi, Pakkun,” Iruka cooed, letting the small dog flop onto his lap and rubbing his ears gently. The other two dogs had started to take an interest in Iruka as well, sniffing at his hands and face where they could. “Do the other two have names?”

“Yeah, I call these two Bisuke and Uhei,” Kakashi replied, smiling.

Iruka grinned, watching as Bisuke and Uhei turned their attentions back to Kakashi, tails wagging hard as they fought for Kakashi’s affections. Pakkun seemed quite content to laze about on Iruka, and Iruka was content to watch Kakashi alternate between petting the dogs and pushing them away when they attempted to lick at his face. No matter how much he tried to keep them away, he always seemed to relent and let the two climb all over him. Iruka could tell that he loved every minute.

Iruka watched the scene for a few moments, unable to keep from smiling wider every time Kakashi nuzzled or babytalked one of the dogs. He felt a strange swell in his chest at the sight, and he found himself wishing that other people in their town could see Kakashi like this. It was a privilege to see this side of Kakashi, to know that Kakashi trusted him enough to be vulnerable in his presence. But his heart also ached at the thought that the public opinion of Kakashi was that of a hardened, violent man. Hell, a few months ago, Iruka would have included himself in that opinion. And as much as he told Kakashi that he didn’t care about what anyone said about him, sometimes it hurt. It hurt to hear people being so _wrong_ about the man that Iruka had, somehow in these few months, fallen head over heels for.

“Hey,”

Iruka’s thoughts were broken by Kakashi’s voice, and he looked up to meet Kakashi’s gaze. Kakashi was sitting against the alley wall, both dogs sprawled across his lap.

“You’ve just been looking at me for a little while now,” he teased, smiling and raising an eyebrow. “Something on your mind?”

Iruka shrugged, returning Kakashi’s small smile. “I…actually, there is something I wanted to talk to you about,” he admitted. “For a couple of days now, actually.”

“Oh?” Kakashi’s eye widened slightly. “Now?”

“Now works for me,” Iruka glanced towards his bag of groceries, and then back at Kakashi. “Walk me home?”

Kakashi nodded, gently moving Uhei and Bisuke off of his lap and waiting for Iruka to do the same with Pakkun. He grabbed Iruka’s groceries as well as his bookbag off the ground before Iruka could protest, offering Iruka his hand to hold instead. Iruka grinned, lacing their fingers together and bumping their shoulders together gently.

“You haven’t stopped being the bad-boy boyfriend cliché, I see,” he teased.

“Nope. And I don’t plan on it.” Kakashi answered, squeezing Iruka’s hand. “What did you wanna talk about?”

“Well,” Iruka began, biting down on his lower lip gently. He’d told Kakashi that he’d been thinking about this for a few days, but in all honesty, it had been more like weeks. It had started in the back of his mind, just a lingering, nagging thought that he could easily push aside for other priorities. But recently the thoughts had been more persistent, and he really needed to let it out.

“I, uh. Well I graduate this semester,” Iruka said, fiddling with the zipper on his jacket distractedly. “Which you knew. But, uh. The school gives every graduating student two tickets to graduation. For their parents, you know? But I, uh…my parents won’t exactly be using them,” he laughed softly, awkwardly. “And I—I’m gonna give one to Naruto. But I still have one, and I was wondering if you’d maybe wanna come? You totally don’t have to, it’s gonna be super long and boring and just a bunch of people giving speeches, but…”

Iruka trailed off, his gaze cast down at his feet. He wasn’t exactly sure why he was so nervous. This felt like a big step, graduation was an important moment in his life. But he wasn’t just asking for the sake of asking, he _wanted_ Kakashi there. He wanted to share that moment with him. And he had no idea how Kakashi would react.

Iruka startled when Kakashi stopped, standing still on the sidewalk in front of Iruka. Iruka felt a hand on his chin, gently tilting his face up until his eyes met Kakashi’s. He felt his face heat up as he looked into Kakashi’s eye, but he couldn’t look away.

“Iruka,” Kakashi began, Iruka was surprised at the amount of emotion behind his voice. “I’m gonna start by saying yes, of _course_ I’m going to be at your graduation,” he murmured. “But I…I’ve had something on my mind recently, too. I...when I first started seeing you, I honestly had no idea why someone like you would even give me the time of day. Honestly, your first reaction outside of the bar was pretty justified,”

Iruka snorted softly in laughter, about to protest, but Kakashi cut him off.

“I’m…gonna be honest, I’ve felt pretty insecure sometimes, being with you. You’re so smart, and successful, you’ve got school and friends and a career. I know the way people talk about me, I know what your friends and coworkers must have thought when you told them about me. What happened the other week at your work…it only made me feel worse,” he paused and Iruka frowned a little, and Kakashi hurried to continue. “I was so afraid that you’d realize one day that you’re too good for me, and that I’ve just been making trouble for you. But I realized something, Iruka. I…I know you don’t give a shit that nobody in town likes me. You never have. And I never used to either, not really. But Iruka…even though you never cared, even though I somehow got crazy fucking lucky enough for you to love me anyway…I wanna change. I don’t want to be the scary man with one eye anymore, Iruka. I mean…I still wanna be me, there’s only so much I can do. But I wanna be someone you can truly be proud of, you know? I just…you make me want to be better.”

Iruka let out a breath he didn’t exactly know he had been holding, feeling tears starting to well up in his eyes. His mind went momentarily blank, and he reacted on impulse; taking Kakashi’s cheeks in both hands and pulling him into a firm, hard kiss. He didn’t know what exactly he was feeling, he knew he had to answer Kakashi, but right now he needed to kiss him senseless.

Iruka barely registered the sound of his groceries hitting the ground before he felt Kakashi’s arms wrap around his waist, pulling him closer. Iruka pulled back after a few moments, resting his forehead against Kakashi’s as he attempted to steady his breath. He ran his fingers through Kakashi’s hair gently, pressing another chaste kiss against his lips.

“You’re such an idiot, Kakashi,” Iruka whispered, squeezing his eyes shut to prevent tears from falling. “You don’t have to change anything for me to be proud of you,”

“I know,” Kakashi murmured, hugging Iruka to himself impossibly tighter. “But you…you inspire me, Iruka. I want to get off my ass and make something more of myself.” He paused, pulling back far enough to look Iruka in the eyes. “And I wouldn’t miss your fucking graduation for the world. I’m so damn proud of you,”

Iruka grinned, leaning up to press another, softer kiss to Kakashi’s lips. He pulled back slowly, a teasing glint in his eyes.

“You better not have broken my eggs when you dropped my groceries to kiss me.”

Kakashi snorted, taking Iruka’s hand and rolling his eyes.

“I’ll buy you new ones. This was worth it.”

___

Iruka pressed Kakashi up against the edge of his kitchen counter with his body, smoothing his hands up over his chest slowly. It was late, Iruka’s friends had just all left his house for the night. He’d had some of his classmates and fellow TAs around for what they called a pre-graduation party, Anko’s idea to unwind before finals really started to hit them all. It had been fun, Iruka’s kitchen and sitting room were covered in paper dishes and empty beer bottles, but Iruka couldn’t bring himself to care right now. He was warm and happy, he was pleasantly buzzed, and he wanted his hands on Kakashi.

Kakashi seemed all too willing to have Iruka’s hands on him, judging by the way he pressed back against him with a contented sigh. Iruka nuzzled into the crook of Kakashi’s neck, kissing along the curve of his shoulder until he heard a breathy moan from Kakashi. He allowed Kakashi to turn in his arms, wrapping his arms around Iruka’s waist and pulling him into a deep kiss. Kakashi hummed softly, pulling back enough to look Iruka in the eyes.

“Bed?” he asked, his voice low and suggestive. Iruka couldn’t deny the shiver that passed down his spine at the tone of Kakashi voice, and he couldn’t resist leaning up to capture Kakashi’s lips in his own again.

“Right here?” Iruka asked, breathlessly, the corners of his mouth quirking up in a smirk.

Kakashi grinned, sliding his hands down to squeeze Iruka’s ass. “Impatient tonight, hm?” he teased, leaning down to kiss and bite at Iruka’s neck.

“Mh, maybe,” Iruka breathed, gripping the front of Kakashi’s shirt and tugging him backwards toward his table with a wicked smile. His ass hit the edge of the table a little harder than he had intended, since he was fully occupied with the idea of removing Kakashi’s shirt from his torso.

Kakashi’s eyes widened a little, and he let out a short laugh. “Careful, Iruka, you’re gonna knock shit over,” he murmured, eyeing the many bottles that were behind Iruka on the table. Iruka pulled him closer roughly in response, causing the table to shake yet again. Kakashi flinched forward as he saw one of the many empty bottles teeter and start to fall, but was too late. The bottle crashed to the floor and broke, the sound of shattering glass echoing through the kitchen.

Iruka’s vision went black and white.

“Shit,” Kakashi muttered, looking down at the glass surrounding them. “Do you have a vacuum, or—Iruka?”

Iruka’s ears were ringing so loud, it almost drowned out Kakashi’s voice completely. The crash of breaking glass was reverberating in Iruka’s head as if it were on an endless loop, and Iruka felt like he was going deaf from it. He couldn’t hear, he couldn’t breathe, he felt like his chest was so constricted he was only using a fraction of the air he gasped in. The glass shattered, his vison blurred, and then…pain. So much pain. He was shaking, and hyperventilating, and bile was rising in his throat. He only realized that he was crying when he was able to process that his hands that clawed at his face were wet.

It was like he suddenly returned to his body from unconsciousness. Every sensation seemed to attack Iruka all at once, the most prominent sensation being the constricting of his throat as the nausea churned in his stomach. He doubled over with a choked retching sound, tears streaming down his face as he fought against his shaking knees in an effort not to collapse.

“Iruka!” Kakashi’s voice was loud, too loud, after the sudden silence after the ringing in Iruka’s ears. But it wasn’t—it didn’t sound like Kakashi’s voice. Kakashi’s voice was blending with a memory, Iruka felt hands on his shoulders and his entire body seized up.

He cried out wordlessly, forcibly knocking the hands away from him before clapping his hand to his mouth and stumbling away, desperately attempting to reach his bathroom before collapsing and emptying his stomach into the toilet. He gripped the edge of the bowl so hard his knuckles went white, coughing and heaving dryly once his stomach had been emptied. He was shaking uncontrollably, unable to block out the sight of blood on his hands, or the sound of sirens mixing with people yelling. His shoulders shook as he gave into a heavy sob, curling in on himself and holding his head in his hands. He dug his nails into his scalp, squeezing his eyes shut in an effort to combat the horrible things he kept seeing and feeling, starting to feel lightheaded from his gasping breaths.

“Go away,” he whimpered, desperate. “Go away, go away, stop it!” his voice rose to a hoarse scream as he curled into himself tightly, burying his face in his knees and clinging to his own arms tightly enough that his nails left scratches across his skin.

“Iruka?” Kakashi’s voice cut across his thoughts, frantic but muffled from behind the bathroom door.

Iruka shrunk as Kakashi opened the door slowly, pressing himself back against the glass door of his shower, hiding his face with another small, choked sob.

“Don’t—!” he begged, his entire body shaking as he braced himself against the door.

“Iruka…” Kakashi’s voice was almost unbearably soft. “It’s Kakashi. You’re home, you’re safe,” his voice was low, and comforting, and it shook slightly with emotion.

Iruka tensed, squeezing his eyes shut as tightly as he could and shaking his head quickly.

“You’re safe, I promise,” Kakashi spoke a little louder, slowly sitting down in the doorway of the bathroom. “Please, come back to me,” he whispered.

Iruka blinked his eyes open slowly, chancing a look past the hands that were still up in defense of his face. His breathing slowed to a more manageable rate as he stared back at Kakashi, and he ever so slowly began to lower his arms.

“Iruka?” Kakashi breathed.

Iruka took in a long, slow breath, feeling sensation start to return to places in his mind and body that had been numbed. He slowly wiped the remnants of tears off of his cheeks, grabbing a wad of toilet paper to wipe at his nose and mouth.

“Iruka, can I—”

“I’m fine,” Iruka muttered, harsh and defensive.

“I…I’ll give you a minute,” Kakashi said softly, slowly standing and leaving Iruka alone in the bathroom.

Iruka could hear him in the kitchen, along with the unmistakable sounds of making tea. Iruka let out a shaky sigh, leaning over the sink to rinse his face in cold water. His hands still shook with every move he made, and his stomach still felt queasy. He glanced at his reflection, taking in his messy hair and puffy eyes, before letting his gaze drop to his hands. He clenched them into fists when they wouldn’t stop shaking, turning and leaving the bathroom.

When he returned to his kitchen, it was to find it completely spotless with Kakashi making tea. Every single bottle, including the one that had shattered on the floor, had been swept away without a trace. It made Iruka feel better, but he turned his gaze from the kitchen all the same. He eventually moved into his sitting room, curling up on the edge of the couch. He didn’t move until he heard Kakashi approach and set a mug of tea on the coffee table in front of him.

Iruka felt another wave of nausea wash over him at the thought of facing Kakashi. That wasn’t fair and he knew it, Kakashi clearly wanted to help. But that was precisely why Iruka couldn’t face him. Iruka was beyond help right now. Nothing Kakashi could do, no matter what his intentions were, was going to be able to fix what had just happened.

Iruka sat up straight and took the mug of tea carefully, staring down into the amber liquid without really seeing it. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t look at Kakashi. He couldn’t bear the questions he knew were waiting for him. He knew Kakashi had sat down on the floor, and was probably waiting for Iruka to say something. But Iruka just couldn’t.

All he could do was sit, trying desperately to hold the pieces of himself together long enough for Kakashi to leave. He couldn’t fall apart in front of him again. He refused to.

___

Kakashi stood in Iruka’s kitchen, frozen in place, surrounded by the shattered remains of a beer bottle. The bottle had broken and Iruka had completely changed, seeming to space out completely before crying, hyperventilating, and then just bolting. He’d thrown Kakashi off like he was being held against his will, and even now Kakashi could hear retching and sobbing from the bathroom.

Kakashi felt like his chest was in a vise. How could Iruka have something like this? How could he not have _known?_ How could he have caused this?

He shook his head quickly, looking around the room. The last thing that happened right before Iruka changed was the bottle. It was obvious what Kakashi had to do.

He grabbed a trash bag from the cabinet under Iruka’s kitchen sink, sweeping broken glass into it without a second thought to his hands. It was more important that he cleaned this up than spared himself a few cuts. He made sure to clean up every unbroken bottle as well, tying up the bag and putting it in a corner of the room. He paused then when he heard Iruka scream, immediately following the sound to the closed bathroom door.

“Iruka?” He called, panic showing through his voice. When he received no reply, he opened the door carefully. Iruka scrambled backwards, away from him, pressing back against the shower and throwing his hands up to protect his face.

“Don’t—!”

Kakashi felt his heart break. He sank down onto the floor slowly, doing anything he could to appear less threatening.

“Iruka…it’s Kakashi. You’re home. You’re safe,” he murmured, his voice breaking slightly when Iruka just shook his head frantically. “You’re safe, I promise,” Kakashi’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Please, come back to me,”

Gradually, over the next few minutes, Iruka seemed to come back to himself. His arms slowly lowered, and his breathing evened out. He wiped at his face, refusing to meet Kakashi’s gaze.

“Iruka?” Kakashi asked, hesitant. “Iruka, can I—”

“I’m fine,” Iruka snapped. Kakashi tried not to flinch. Just because it was expected, didn’t mean it wasn’t going to sting a little. But Iruka needed time, he needed to collect himself.

“I’ll…give you a minute,” Kakashi murmured, leaving the bathroom and returning to the kitchen. His mind was racing with a million different thoughts, each one a little more frantic than the other. Iruka was hurting _so much_ , and Kakashi was doing so _little_ to help. He wasn’t even sure there was anything he could do to help at all.

At a loss for anything else, he started to make tea. Iruka had told him once that tea helped him relax and calm down when he was feeling stressed, and while “stressed” was somewhat of a misnomer for this particular situation, the principle still applied. Kakashi knew damn well that tea was hardly going to solve the problem, but he figured whatever comfort he could supply would at least be a good start.

Iruka was silent when he shuffled out of the bathroom, sitting on the couch, still insistently avoiding Kakashi’s gaze. Kakashi felt his stomach flip unpleasantly at the thought, and pushed it away furiously. He set the mug down in front of Iruka and watched as Iruka took it, staring into it like it wasn’t really there.

Kakashi sat on the floor opposite the couch, every few seconds he spared a glance towards Iruka. Iruka was sat on the couch corner farthest away from Kakashi, rigid and tense on the edge of the seat. He held the cup of tea Kakashi had made in both hands, and was staring into it with a blank, glazed expression. His eyes were red and tears still threatened to spill out over his cheeks at any moment, and he made no movement to look at Kakashi.

Kakashi didn’t know what to do.

“When I was ten years old, I found my dad. Dead.” He murmured, his voice low and soft. “He, uh. He killed himself. No note or anything. I didn’t know what to do. Police took him away, shoved me in foster care. I pretty much repressed it to get over it,” he paused, looking up at Iruka. He still hadn’t moved. “When I was fourteen, and living on my own…there was this regular at the pawn shop. Sold us pretty much everything he had. He was an addict. But he was a nice guy…not much older than me, always smiled. One day, I had closed up the shop and was headed home, and I found him in the alley. Dead. OD’d, probably. He…looked just like dad,” Kakashi whispered, not even sure if Iruka could hear him anymore. “I broke. I couldn’t move, or speak. It felt like I had gone back to that day. I couldn’t see anything but my dad on the ground. When I came back to reality, it was the next afternoon. Asuma took me to his house. Said I was sobbing all night for my dad.”

He paused, willing his own tears not to fall. This wasn’t about him, this was about Iruka.

“Iruka, I…I don’t know what you went through. You don’t have to tell me. But it must have been…so horrible,” he paused, sighing softly. “I don’t know…what to do to help you right now. But whatever it is, I’ll do it. Anything,”

Iruka still hadn’t moved, but the hands holding his cup were visibly shaking. A single tear slid down his cheek and he wiped it away almost angrily, putting his cup down on the coffee table and curling in on himself.

“You should go.”

Kakashi’s eye slipped shut and he hung his head, willing the words not to hurt. He had said the same, when Asuma first offered to help. He hadn’t realized then, how hard it was to think about leaving someone when they looked so broken.

“Okay.” he agreed, standing up slowly and picking up his jacket. “If you think of anything else I can do…just tell me,” he made a move like he was going to reach out to Iruka, freezing when he caught Iruka’s entire body flinch away minutely. He let his arm drop, turning away.

He shut Iruka’s door behind him, every instinct in his body screaming at him to go back, to stay, to show Iruka how much he cared about him and wanted to keep him safe. Even though he knew too well the urge to be alone, and how terrifying it would be to have someone try and forcibly stay.

He drove himself home on autopilot, his brain not able to catch up with his body until he found himself in his own home, sitting on his couch, mostly in the dark. As soon as he came to, thoughts from the last hour came rushing back. One clumsy moment, one broken bottle, and he’d caused Iruka pain. The same kind of terrible, world-shattering pain that took Kakashi too many long years to deal with on his own. And he’d had no idea Iruka had anything like that. The memory of Iruka’s eyes was haunting him, he could see them clear as day. Iruka’s eyes weren’t supposed to look like that. Iruka’s eyes were warm and deep and kind, they had an inextinguishable spark behind them that Kakashi loved so much. But when he saw Iruka’s eyes before he left…they were dull, unfocused, blank and staring, like Iruka wasn’t behind them anymore. It made Kakashi feel sick.

Kakashi stayed on his couch for the rest of the night, completely still. He didn’t see any point in trying to go to sleep, he knew it would be impossible. Besides, he wanted to be awake just in case Iruka needed him. He was going to be there no matter what.

But Iruka didn’t need him. He stayed awake as light slowly begin to fill his apartment, as Tenzo shuffled out of his room and paused. He brushed off Tenzo’s questions, ignored his offer for coffee, and probably would have continued ignoring him in favor of staring blankly at the floor if Tenzo hadn’t hit him in the side of the head with a plastic spoon.

“What the fuck, Tenzo?” Kakashi snapped, throwing the offending spoon back. He missed, the clattering of the spoon to the floor far too loud in the small space.

“You’re spacing. I haven’t seen you like this since…it means something bad is up. Have you been here all night? What happened?”

 Kakashi paused, looking up into Tenzo’s earnest, worried face. And it was like something broke. He slumped over onto the couch like a puppet who’s strings were cut, bringing his arm up to cover his eyes. And he told Tenzo everything, about how breaking the bottle seemed to break Iruka, and how helpless he felt, recognizing Iruka’s symptoms but being completely unable to help.

“I completely froze up,” he admitted, miserable. “I didn’t—I didn’t know what to do, I was afraid to touch him, I don’t think he recognized me and he—he seemed like he was in pain…” he paused, squeezing his eyes shut. “I was so fucking useless. I couldn’t do anything for him. And then he just…when he…when he came back, he just told me to leave. There wasn’t anything I could do. So I left. I just left him like that, Tenzo, how could I have just left him like that?”

“You did what he asked you to,” Tenzo replied gently, kneeling in front of the couch with a small sigh. “Kakashi, that’s all you could do. You respected what he wanted. That was for the best,”

“But I should have done _more_ ,” Kakashi insisted, feeling the prickling burn of tears behind his eye. “I should have—I—”

“Breathe,” Tenzo murmured, and Kakashi realized that Tenzo was gently holding his face in his hands. Grounding him. Kakashi fell forward slowly, until his forehead was resting against Tenzo’s shoulder.

Kakashi squeezed his eye shut, a single tear slipping out down his face. He let out a deep, shaky breath, unable to hold back a small, choked-off sob when he felt Tenzo’s arms wrap around his shoulders.

“Hey,” Tenzo’s voice was calm and comforting, and he rubbed Kakashi’s back gently. “Hey, you’re okay,” he waited until Kakashi regained some of his composure, and was even willing to pretend he didn’t notice Kakashi wiping at his eye as he sat up.

“You should get some sleep, Kakashi,” Tenzo suggested.

Kakashi was inclined to agree. The events of last night finally seemed to be catching up to him, and he was both emotionally and physically exhausted. He shuffled into his bedroom, not even bothering to change out of his clothes before falling into bed. He wiggled his cell phone out of his pocket with some effort, pausing with it in his hand with the intent to toss it onto the floor beside his mattress. He deliberated a few moments before sending Iruka a text, offering support if he wanted it. He then slid the phone under the pillow he buried his face in, drifting off into restless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...Yeah...I've been holding out on this angst for a while. Kakashi had to find out somehow.   
>  I hate to leave you guys on a note like this, but my life is about to get pretty hectic, and I'm not sure when the next update will be. I'll do my level best to keep updating regularly, the story is so close to being done! I hope you're still enjoying, even though this one is sad <3


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the tags have the mentions of abuse warnings but just to let you guys know, if you're sensitive to descriptions of abuse this chapter has quite a bit of that, so stay safe and healthy <3

Kakashi hadn’t heard from Iruka in five days.

He’d sent him a text the morning after the incident, checking up on him and offering anything he needed once again. Iruka hadn’t answered him.

Kakashi wished he could say it wasn’t affecting him. Leaving Iruka that night had been one of the hardest things he had ever done, and he wanted so badly to be there for him. The past 120 hours had been nothing but Kakashi warring with himself, wanting desperately to contact Iruka while trying to convince himself that it was best right now to give Iruka space. Iruka would come to him when he was ready. But what if he never was? What if Kakashi had actually fucked this up? Iruka had become so important to him so fast, he didn’t know if he could handle having it taken away out of nowhere.

It was 7:15pm on the sixth day of radio silence. Kakashi hadn’t left his room in 24 hours. He was almost convinced that Iruka would never want to see him again.

His phone lit up with a text, and Kakashi thought he was dreaming.

**_Can you come over?_ **

Kakashi’s breath caught in his throat. Iruka wanted him to come over. Iruka wanted to see him again. Relief flooded through Kakashi’s system in such a sudden rush he felt dizzy for a moment.

**Of course. Now?**

**_Yes._ **

The relief was short-lived, however, Iruka’s short responses making worry creep into Kakashi’s mind. He pulled his jacket on, practically bursting out of his room, nearly making Tenzo jump out of his skin.

“Kakashi holy shit, what’s going on?”

Kakashi grabbed his helmet, barely sparing Tenzo a glance before heading to the door.

“Iruka answered me. I’m going over there.”

Tenzo nodded, smiling a little.

“I’m…glad you guys are okay.”

“I hope we are,” Kakashi muttered, shoving his helmet on and riding to Iruka’s as quickly as he could. He didn’t bother to text when he arrived, heading immediately up to Iruka’s apartment. He paused at Iruka’s door, trying to steady his breathing. Yeah, Iruka wanted to see him. But he certainly didn’t seem to be his usual self. What if Kakashi couldn’t help him? What if Iruka was breaking it off with him? Kakashi had never been broken up with before, but he knew that this would hurt way more than he ever imagined it would.

He shut his eyes, letting out a long breath, and knocked.

Iruka pulled the door open, pausing in the doorway when he caught Kakashi’s eye. Neither man spoke for a few seconds, and Kakashi felt the same tense anxiety creeping up on him again. It had only been a few days, but he had missed Iruka so _much._ Seeing him again, for what his mind had convinced him could be the last time, filled him with an almost overwhelming rush of emotion that Kakashi wasn’t sure he could handle. 

Kakashi’s thoughts were interrupted by Iruka’s hand, reaching out to grip the front of Kakashi’s shirt. He allowed himself to be pulled inside, stumbling a little only to be pulled against Iruka in a crushingly tight hug.

Kakashi let out a small, choked noise as Iruka buried his face into his chest, bringing his arms around Iruka’s shoulders and holding him close. He nuzzled his face into Iruka’s hair, taking in a deep, shaky breath. He’d missed this, being close to Iruka, feeling him everywhere around him. He immediately felt tension start to drain out of his body, everything about Iruka a comforting force.

“I’m so sorry, Kakashi,” Iruka sniffled into his chest. “I didn’t mean to kick you out…and not talk for so long…but you came back, you came…you’re _here_ , Kakashi,”

“Of course I am,” Kakashi murmured in what he hoped was a soothing voice. “Iruka…I’ll always come back to you, as long as you’ll let me. I promise.”

Iruka squeezed him tighter for a few seconds, pulling back far enough to look up into Kakashi’s eye.

“Kakashi…

Kakashi stroked through Iruka’s hair gently, leaning in and kissing Iruka’s forehead.

“Just tell me what you need, Iruka.”

___

20 minutes later, after Iruka felt he had done all the stalling he possibly could, the two of them were sat on the couch with a cup of tea each. Iruka couldn’t make eye contact, he couldn’t even look over at Kakashi. He was so nervous, he felt like he couldn’t do so much as drink the tea without throwing up again. It was all he could do to keep his hands from shaking, and he didn’t think he’d be able to say the same about his voice.

“Kakashi…I wanna tell you about—about why I reacted the way I did,” he said softly, staring into the swirls of steam rising from his mug. “About the night I…I…” he trailed off, feeling tears threatening to well up in his eyes again. He could do this. He could _talk_ about it.

“Iruka,” Kakashi murmured, reaching a hand forward but hesitating just before touching Iruka’s knee. “You don’t have to tell me anything you’re not comfortable with. You don’t—owe me an explanation.”

“I know I don’t,” Iruka said, a little more forcefully than he intended. “This isn’t—I want you to know, Kakashi, I need you to know what happened so you—” he paused, taking in a deep, steadying breath. “So…so you know, so you understand why I’m—like this.”

“Okay,” Kakashi relented, setting his mug down on the coffee table, and facing Iruka with his full attention.

Iruka swallowed heavily. This was it. He’d spent the better part of a week after the…incident, fighting himself over whether or not to tell Kakashi everything that had happened to him. It didn’t seem right, having Kakashi not know. But at the same time, having someone in his life who had no idea was freeing. The people who knew tended to look at Iruka like they pitied him, and he couldn’t bear it if Kakashi started to look at him like that too.

But he needed to know.

“A little over a year ago, I…There was a guy who worked at the elementary school with me. He was a few years older, he’d just gotten out of school and was working at the school as a substitute. His name was Mizuki,” Iruka paused, shutting his eyes for a few seconds. He could do this. Just stay calm. Repeat facts. Don’t get emotional. “He, uh. Flirted with me a lot, in the teacher’s lounge at lunch, or in my classrooms after school. When the teachers and TAs went out for drinks on Fridays, he’d always pester me to go. He’d always sit with me and buy me drinks…we started dating pretty soon after I started there.”

He paused again, chancing a glance up at Kakashi’s face. It was stone, completely unreadable. Iruka averted his eyes again, staring into his tea like it had a script he had to follow.

“I didn’t…I was younger, and didn’t have a lot of…experience. And it was my first ‘real’ relationship, so I kind of—I had rose-colored glasses, you know? Kotetsu and Genma and Anko…they kept telling me that they didn’t like him, that he was only nice when I was around and when I wasn’t there he—and that he gave them weird vibes, but I didn’t listen, I don’t even know why. And that’s when—Mizuki started to get…clingy, I guess? Possessive, you know? I didn’t realize at the time but he was keeping me away from all of them—I only ever really saw Kotetsu at work and Anko in class, I didn’t see Genma at all anymore. The only person I ever really hung out with was Mizuki, because he’d cut me off from them. He’d tell me all the time how much he didn’t get along with them—he hated Anko especially, they always fought. So I didn’t wanna have them be together…but since I was always with him, I ended up just never seeing her. But Naruto…he was the most jealous of Naruto. And it seemed so stupid, like how could you be jealous of a kid? But he was, so... I…saw him less and less…”

Iruka fidgeted a little, curling his knees up close to his chest.

“After that, he…he kind of always had this temper. He was really insecure, and it—it turned into jealousy really easily,” he murmured, picking at a small hole in his sweatpants. “I started…watching my words around him, being on my guard constantly, because he was scary when he got mad. Everything that made him angry felt like my fault. He treated it like it was my fault…so it felt like walking on eggshells whenever he was around, but he was around all the time. He…got let go from his job at the school about four months into our dating. He couldn’t handle it, he was so angry that he got let go but I was still there. He hated me working when he wasn’t around. Said he wanted to be close to me, and got so _angry_ when I said I wouldn’t leave…he started drinking a lot after that,”

Iruka glanced up again, looking over at Kakashi. His face was the same, blank and emotionless. But his hands were in fists. Iruka looked away again.

“He got even angrier when he drank,” Iruka said, the words coming out faster, the things he held in tumbling out in a rush. Like if he got it out quickly, maybe it wouldn’t hurt. Rip the band-aid off. “He’d yell, scream at me, threaten me…but when he sobered up he’d always apologize, and cry, and beg me to stay with him because I was all he had left. It was…so overwhelming. He would always tell me that he’d kill himself without me. I didn’t know what else to do…”

He squeezed his eyes shut, holding his knees to his chest.

“One night, when he’d been drinking a lot…I had gone out, with the TAs, because it was a Friday…I hadn’t been the past few weeks, but that week was Kotetsu’s birthday. I went for him. Mizuki was furious. Told me I was worthless and stupid, accused me of cheating on him…he was yelling and slurring and knocking things over…he knocked a bunch of his empty bottles onto the floor, and broke another in his hand…”

Iruka didn’t realize how badly his hands were shaking until he felt Kakashi’s hands on his own, gently taking the tea from him and setting it on the table. Kakashi kept Iruka’s hands in his own, holding them in a loose, comforting grip.

“He’d never hit me before,” Iruka felt his voice break, hot tears spilling over his cheeks finally. His fingers tightened over Kakashi’s squeezing his hands tightly. “But that night he—he was so angry, he was yelling so much and I was yelling back because I’d just had it, I couldn’t take being treated like—and he hit me, he hit me across the face with the broken bottle and it cut—it cut across my nose, and into my cheeks, and broke my nose…and I fell, he hit me so hard I fell, and I landed on my back on top of the broken bottles…”

He pulled his hands away from Kakashi, curling in on himself and wiping his tears away forcefully.

“He changed as soon as he realized. Stopped yelling. I was afraid to move. I didn’t even know if I _could_ move. I was begging him to call for help, to get me an ambulance. He kept repeating the same thing. “You can’t tell them I did this. You can’t tell them I did this to you.” Over and over and over…I had blood in my eyes from my nose and glass embedded in my back and he was worried about _him_. He went to the bathroom, to get something to clean my face, and I did it. I dragged myself to my cell phone. I dialed 911, told them “help”, and passed out…I woke up on a gurney. Everything was blurry, and everything sounded too close and far away at the same time. I could hear him screaming…screaming at the cops, he kept repeating “you have no right to do this to me!”…I was losing feeling in my legs because he almost cut into my spine…and he said _they_ had no right to do that to _him_ …”

Iruka took in a deep breath, the last part of the story coming out nonstop, in a frantic rush. A heavy sob racked his entire body, and he felt Kakashi slowly pull him against his chest. Kakashi held him, securely but not tightly, letting Iruka cry into his shirt until he managed to regain his breath.

“I…when I woke up again, I was in the hospital,” he whispered, his fingers tightening into Kakashi’s shirt. “Nobody was there but the nurse. As soon as she saw I was awake, she called for…these cops came in, and they—they were asking all these questions all at once…what our relationship was, how long we’d been sleeping together, if he’d ever—if it was always consensual…if he’d ever hurt me before…and I—I told them no, and they took all these pictures of me and then they just. They just left. They said they’d be in touch. And the hospital counselor came to talk to me, and I had to relive it _again._ And then everyone was gone, and I was alone, and my entire body hurt and I had so many bandages on my face I could barely see…”

Iruka sniffled softly, wiping his nose on his hoodie sleeve, and burying his face further into Kakashi’s chest.

“They…they asked me if they should call anyone for me. But I don’t—I told them to call Anko. She came immediately, and she was so…she was so angry. She tried to hide it because I—but I could tell. She and Kotetsu visited every day. I…I almost couldn’t bear to tell Naruto,” he whispered, squeezing his eyes shut. “He was so…I didn’t want him to see me like that. But I told him once I’d started to recover…and he came to see me, but he was so…quiet. Everyone who came to visit me just had this _look_ on their face the whole time, like they pitied me, I couldn’t fucking stand it…”

Iruka let out a deep sigh, pushing his hair out of his face.

“So…that’s it, basically. That’s…what happened…”

Kakashi pressed a kiss to Iruka’s forehead, holding him a little tighter. Iruka let out a shaky breath, almost laughing. It was a relief, weirdly enough, having the story out. He hated reliving it, trying to put it in words had been hard enough immediately after it happened. But now, having it out there…the last wall between the two of them was down. It didn’t have to be a terrible, shameful secret anymore.

“What happened to him?” Kakashi asked quietly.

Iruka did laugh then, but it was a hollow, emotionless sound.

“He was served with a temporary restraining order for 20 days. Couldn’t be within 100 yards of me,” Iruka muttered. “The bastard could have paralyzed me. But his daddy was rich, and I was the little fag slut who corrupted his boy. I deserved what I got, so daddy got him a fancy lawyer. So that’s all I got.”

“So he got nothing?” Kakashi asked, anger evident in his voice despite all attempts to keep himself under control. “He’s still around?”

Iruka shook his head. “No. Moved away. Nobody around here would hire him in a school, after that.” He sighed heavily, drained. “The police are fucking useless. I was lucky to get what I got. And he…he left me alone after that. I got out pretty easy,”

“ _Easy?_ ” Kakashi asked, incredulous. “Iruka, he put you in the _hospital_. He isolated you from your friends, and manipulated you, and hurt you physically. You don’t have to make light of this,”

Iruka seemed to shrink, shrugging his shoulders noncommittally.

“I’m okay,” he insisted, his voice small. “I’m alive, and he’s gone. And I’m…mostly unscathed. The scars are—I’m used to the scars. But I didn’t…the other day, I hadn’t ever—”

“You’d never had a flashback before?” Kakashi asked gently.

Iruka laughed the same hollow laugh again, shutting his eyes. “A flashback? Is that what that was?” he asked, rubbing at his eyes. “No…that never happened before.” He paused. “It was fucking awful,”

Kakashi nodded, rubbing Iruka’s back gently. “No, they’re terrible,” he agreed.

“I did hear you,” Iruka murmured. “When you told me about…I remember,” he looked up at Kakashi, biting his lip gently. “I’m sorry about your dad. That must have been so scary,”

Kakashi shrugged a shoulder, looking down at his lap. “It was a long time ago. I’ve mostly dealt with it. But I…I recognized, at least a little, what was happening…and I still didn’t know how to help.”

“I didn’t know what would have helped, either,” Iruka shook his head a little. “And if it happens again…”

“If it happens again, at least I’ll know more, right?” Kakashi offered. “I didn’t know how to help last time, in part because I had no idea what caused it. Now that I know…for one, I can be more careful to make sure it doesn’t happen again. And I feel like I can have a better idea of how to calm you down…”

Iruka frowned questioningly as Kakashi trailed off, his eye widening in realization.

“This is why, isn’t it?” Kakashi asked. “This is why I worried your friends, why Naruto tried to come check me out. It’s because of this,”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “Yeah, this would be why,” he sighed softly. “After we hooked up the first time, Kotetsu—he thought it was a bad idea,” he muttered, frowning. He couldn’t quite bring himself to tell Kakashi exactly what Kotetsu had said. It would just make Kakashi feel bad, anyway. “And Naruto…he really worries about me. He tries not to let it on, but I know he does. But they both know you now, and they know you’d never…” he sighed softly, shaking his head a little. “They trust you. I trust you. I wouldn’t have told you all of this if I didn’t,”

“I know,” Kakashi murmured, squeezing Iruka’s shoulder gently. “I do everything I can to deserve that trust,”

“You don’t have to do anything different,” Iruka insisted, turning to bury his face in Kakashi’s chest again. “Kakashi…I didn’t know how to put it into words before, really, but I…I feel safe when I’m around you. I…I feel like I’m home,”

Iruka’s voice was small, and muffled, and he worried for a second that Kakashi was silent because he hadn’t heard him. But then he let out a small sigh, wrapping both arms around Iruka and pulling him fully into his lap in a firm hug. Iruka smiled his first genuine smile in almost a week, wrapping himself around Kakashi and relaxing against him. He felt Kakashi run his fingers through his hair gently, and almost melted into Kakashi’s chest at the sensation. He missed the affection and the comfort Kakashi gave him so much the past few days, and was mentally kicking himself for being too scared to come forward to Kakashi about his history sooner. The relief he felt with Kakashi now was indescribable.

Kakashi nuzzled into Iruka’s neck, kissing his jaw softly. “I love you,” he murmured lowly, sending a shiver down Iruka’s spine. “So, so much,”

“I know,” Iruka whispered, hugging Kakashi tighter. “I love you, too…so, _so_ much,”

Iruka pulled back far enough to rest his forehead against Kakashi’s, lacing their fingers together. He smiled when Kakashi brought their hands to his lips, feeling his cheeks grow hot as Kakashi gently kissed his fingers.

“Kakashi?”

“Hm?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“You’ve told me a lot about you today, I suppose that’s only fair,” Kakashi replied with a small smile.

Iruka bit his lip gently, glancing into his lap quickly before back up at Kakashi.

“You don’t have to answer if you…but I just wanted to ask about you and…what you went through after your dad,” he said softly. “How did you…get yourself through it?”

Kakashi’s eyes widened slightly, clearly not expecting the question. He was silent for a few moments, considering. 

“It took me a really long time,” he murmured, his brow furrowing as he thought. “Nobody really talked to me about it. I was kind of a terror as a child, as you’ve heard. I was written off pretty fast as a troubled foster kid with an attitude problem…and I guess they were kind of right. But it didn’t really hit me how bad it fucked me up until that day with Asuma,”

He paused, biting his lip gently. “And I guess, after that…Asuma wouldn’t let it go. He had no idea what caused it—he had his guesses, of course—but he didn’t know the whole story. It wasn’t like he pestered me or anything, he didn’t even demand to know. He just…was friendlier, I guess? More concerned with making sure I was getting fed and stuff. Turned into a real big brother type real fast,”

Kakashi smiled fondly at the memory, before shrugging. “I dunno. At that point, the only people who knew what happened that night were Asuma, Tenzo, and Gai. Tenzo was the first person who wormed the whole story out of me. After that, I told Asuma…not all of it. But enough that he knew where I came from. And it just…it felt a little better every time. Obviously it still hurts, it’s probably gonna fuck me up forever. I still feel kind of panicky every time I see someone passed out drunk, or whatever. But it hasn’t incapacitated me in years,” he paused, smiling a little. “I probably should have seen a therapist.”

Iruka snorted. “Yeah, we probably both should have,”

“It’s not too late to,” Kakashi pointed out, shrugging a shoulder. “I’m kinda a lost cause, I figured my shit out pretty well. But yours was more recent, it still could help. If you wanted.”

Iruka sighed, wrinkling his nose up. Anko, Kotetsu, Genma, _and_ the psychiatrist at the hospital had all bothered him to go see someone after he was released from the hospital. He knew they were probably right, but at the time, the thought of talking and thinking about Mizuki made him nauseous and panicky. He’d shut down the idea of therapy quickly and firmly, opting instead for trying to forget the whole ordeal. Perhaps it was time to reconsider.

“I do get free counseling through school,” he murmured. “At least for another month, until I graduate.”

“Hey, you gotta start somewhere,” Kakashi smiled. “But it’s your choice. I’m behind you either way,”

Iruka smiled, leaning back into Kakashi’s chest and letting his eyes slip shut.

“I’ll think about it…later,” he promised. “Now I just want to snuggle,”

Kakashi laughed softly, wrapping his arms around Iruka’s shoulders.

“Then that’s what we’ll do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh I just want all these characters to seek therapy somehow and if I have to write it myself I will. This was a super emotional chapter for me to write, I hope you all are enjoying it. <3 It's almost done!


	14. Chapter 14

“So, I…talked to someone today,” Iruka looked up from his textbook, glancing back toward his kitchen, where Kakashi was preparing dinner.

“Mm, so very specific,”

“Okay, shut up,” Iruka rolled his eyes, turning to shoot a small glare as he heard Kakashi snort in laughter. “I mean, I saw…I saw a counselor today. About…yeah,” Iruka murmured, shrugging a shoulder.

Iruka glanced back again when he heard Kakashi pause, feeling his cheeks heat up slightly when he met Kakashi’s gaze.

“Yeah?” Kakashi asked. “How was that?”

Iruka shrugged again, setting his book on the couch beside himself and drawing his knees up to his chest. “I don’t…I don’t know. It was weird, but she was nice, and I…we talked about it. A little. Not the whole story, but. I told her that something happened the other week that made me want to talk to someone, so…” he trailed off, looking up at Kakashi.

Kakashi smiled softly, stepping close enough to press a kiss to Iruka’s forehead. “I’m proud of you,”

Iruka wrinkled his nose, smiling shyly. “I mean…it’s not that big a deal. It was just talking,”

“that’s not true at all,” Kakashi insisted. “It’s not like you were chatting, Iruka. Talking about this shit is hard, and getting help is scary. And I’m never not gonna be proud of you,”

Iruka flushed darker, letting out a small noise in embarrassed protest. It just felt weird, being told that he was being brave or treated like he was doing something heroic when he was just talking to someone about his issues. The counselor he saw today had done the same thing, telling him that he should feel proud of himself for coming in to talk. Iruka just wanted people to not make a bigger deal out of it than it needed to be.

Kakashi laughed softly, gently running his fingers through Iruka’s hair before returning to the kitchen to resume cooking.

“I had something I wanted to talk to you about, too,”

Iruka raised an eyebrow, shutting his book and turning his attention toward Kakashi, who’s back was turned to him as he cooked. “Oh?”

“Yeah. Remember, a while ago, I told you that you made me want to…be better?”

Iruka bit back the impulse to reaffirm that Kakashi didn’t have to improve anything about himself on Iruka’s behalf, opting instead for a small noise of confirmation.

“Yeah. Well, I looked into enrolling in some classes today. Nothing major, I obviously have a job and can’t afford to do more than maybe one or two night classes a semester. And I don’t exactly have a high school diploma or anything, so…but it doesn’t look impossible. So…I’m thinking about it,”

Iruka’s face split into a wide grin. “Kakashi, holy shit, that’s great!” he stood, walking to the kitchen and wrapping his arms around Kakashi’s waist. “You might have to get your GED first, before any college classes. But I can probably help with that,”

“You sure using my own private teacher isn’t cheating?” Kakashi teased, turning to kiss Iruka’s nose quickly.

Iruka giggled softly, burying his nose into Kakashi’s shoulder. “Yeah, maybe. But I won’t tell if you don’t,”

“Deal,” Kakashi chuckled, turning back to take their dinner off the stove. He turned around in Iruka’s arms, careful to hold the hot pan away from their bodies, and allowed Iruka to press a soft kiss to his lips.

“I’m really proud of you, Kakashi,” Iruka murmured, smiling. He bit his lip, smiling wider as Kakashi’s cheeks flushed pink. “I love you,”

“I love you, too,” Kakashi answered, kissing Iruka’s forehead before stepping toward the table. “But we should eat dinner while it’s still hot.”

___

Kakashi smiled, leaning up against the doorframe of Iruka’s bedroom, watching as Iruka fretted in front of his mirror. He was done up in black slacks and a deep red button down, a necktie draped untied around his neck as he struggled with his hair. Kakashi didn’t understand exactly why Iruka was struggling, his hair looked much the same as it did every day, despite the fact that Iruka had done and re-done it at least four times. He let out a huff in frustration, letting his hands drop to his sides and his hair fall around his shoulders.

“What’s up, hm?” Kakashi murmured, pushing away from the door to come up behind Iruka.

Iruka leaned back against Kakashi, relaxing against his chest. “I’m nervous,” he admitted in a small voice. “I don’t know _why_ , but I am,”

Kakashi chuckled as Iruka pouted, rubbing Iruka’s shoulders gently.

“Yeah, I don’t really know much about college, but I would have thought graduation would be the easiest part of it,”

“Yeah, you’d think,” Iruka muttered, melting a little against Kakashi’s chest as he ran his fingers through Iruka’s hair. “Can’t we just skip it?”

“We can do whatever you want, Princess,” Kakashi murmured, grinning when Iruka wrinkled his nose and whacked his shoulder gently. “No, really. We can play hooky if that’s really what you wanna do. Prove everyone who called me a bad influence right,”

“No, I’m gonna go,” Iruka’s heavy sigh turned into a soft, appreciative hum as Kakashi ran his fingers through his hair more purposefully, tugging gently as he drew Iruka’s hair up into its signature ponytail. “I just…I don’t know. I feel like there’s all this pressure now to like…go out and do something with my fancy degree,” he wrinkled his nose. “And like…people will be bragging about all the cool shit they’re gonna be doing. I don’t have any cool shit,”

“Do too,” Kakashi countered, finishing Iruka’s ponytail and moving on to his necktie. “Sure, it might not be super glamorous. But after how excited you were for that job offer, you’re not allowed to say it isn’t exactly what you wanted.”

Iruka smiled sheepishly, kissing Kakashi’s nose quickly when he finished tying his necktie. “I mean…you’re right,” he admitted. “And besides, I always have my hot biker boyfriend to brag about,”

Kakashi snorted, rolling his eyes. “Not many people around here think that’s much to brag about,”

“Well, they don’t know what the hell they’re missing.”

Kakashi rolled his eyes again, but felt his cheeks and ears heat up regardless.

“Well, now that we’ve settled that you’ve got just as many bragging rights as anybody…you ready?”

Iruka smiled, reaching out to lace his fingers with Kakashi’s.

“I think I am.”

_—Epilogue—_

Iruka came to a pause in his closing sentence as he was cut off by intrusive sound of the end of day bell. He couldn’t help but smile a little as all his students jolted to collect their things and rush out the door. Iruka couldn’t be boring them or overworking them yet, it was only the first day. He shook his head gently, first days never changed no matter the class, he supposed. He raised his voice slightly to be heard over the din of shuffling papers, zipping backpacks, and squeaking chairs.

“Remember, we start chapter one tomorrow! You don’t have to have it read, but make sure you have your books!” he called out after his students’ retreating backs, allowing himself to laugh quietly once they all had gone. He began packing up his own things, breaking into a full grin when his phone on his desk lip up with a text. He shoved the last of his papers into his bag, grabbing a familiar old, scarred leather jacket off the back of his desk chair and throwing it on over his button down. Most days, he knew he’d probably end up staying late to grade and to work with students. But today, he made sure that he could have the evening off. It was special, after all.

Some of his new students and colleagues were still milling about in the lobby and outside when Iruka head towards the exit, and he overheard several of the kids he taught murmuring under their breath. When he caught a few of their hushed words his grin only widened, and he pushed open the front doors of the middle school.

Just as he expected, waiting for him out front was none other than Kakashi; still on his old bike, still with his personalized helmet, but with a new shiny leather jacket to replace the one Iruka had effectively stolen. Iruka all but skipped out to meet him, hearing more than one curious noise from his students behind him.

Iruka wasted no time in pulling off Kakashi’s helmet, tossing it onto the seat behind him and pulling Kakashi in by the lapels to kiss him thoroughly. Kakashi met him with a grin and a raised eyebrow once they parted, slipping a hand around Iruka’s waist and into his back pocket.

“What, you miss me or somethin’, Mr. Umino?”

Iruka felt his cheeks flush and swatted Kakashi on the shoulder gently. “My students have to call me that, don’t you dare ruin it for me,”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Kakashi grinned, reaching into his pack and procuring a second helmet for Iruka. “Ready to go?”

“Of course,” Iruka smiled, pulling his helmet on and handing Kakashi his own back. “It’s our anniversary, after all. Can’t keep you waiting any longer,”

Iruka wrapped his arms around Kakashi’s waist tightly as Kakashi revved the engine, pulling out of the parking lot and speeding back towards their apartment. If Iruka had been able to glance behind him, he would have been overjoyed to see the slack-jawed looks of shock from a group of his 8th graders at what their straight-laced Mr. Umino had just done.

When he returned in the morning, with his worn leather jacket, badly-concealed hickies, a beaming smile, and brand new gold ring, he found himself laughing off a lot of persistent questions about motorcycles and the cool man with the white hair who made him blush.

Later, when he told Kakashi about the trouble he’d stirred up, he’d been met with a wicked grin.

“Wait till you come in as Mr. Hatake. Talk about stirring up trouble,”

Iruka raised an eyebrow, smirking a little. “What makes you think I’m taking your name, hm? Maybe you should take mine,”

Kakashi shrugged. “I’m open to that. It’d be an honor,”

“It was a joke, you weren’t supposed to make it sweet,” Iruka pouted, flopping onto the couch with his head in Kakashi’s lap. He hummed contentedly when Kakashi pulled his hair free and ran his fingers through it slowly.

“Sorry to disappoint,” Kakashi murmured. “Seeing you in that ring makes me feel all sappy,”

“You big softie,” Iruka grinned. “I’m telling everyone that the infamous Kakashi Hatake is a big damn romantic.”

Kakashi rolled his eyes, flicking a piece of Iruka’s hair against his nose teasingly. “Yeah, you go right ahead and do that,” he laughed. “Tell them Kakashi Hatake fell head over heels for a smart mouthed teacher, and it was the best thing that ever happened to him.”

Iruka laughed, sitting up and wrapping his arms around Kakashi’s waist, nuzzling into his neck.

“Glad I yelled at you until you took me home?”

“Best botched hookup of my life.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I'm posting this, I'm currently on a plane moving across the country! But holy shit, it's done! Sorry this took me so long, I had a lot of school and loose ends to tie up this last month. I do really feel like I'm not done with this world, there may be some oneshots in the future because I love Awkward Biker Kakashi and Smart Mouthed Student Iruka so goddamn much. Thanks for sticking with me through this ride, I've got so much more coming soon if you're interested in more from me. Every one of your comments on this made my day every time. <3


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